Secrets Thread - Read first post!

tips on how to cope: dealing with your feelings, dealing with the consequences of self-harm in your life. share your ideas and maybe pick up some new skills, too. you don't have to want to stop to learn something new here.

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bearcat
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Re: Secrets Thread - Read first post!

Post by bearcat » Sun Oct 26, 2014 3:55 am

I am really struggling here people. Can someone please answer a text? Like is it really that you're busy or am I just that annoying. What have I gotten myself into?
Be diligent, dutiful, and hardworking; be rational, consistent, and trustworthy; be kind, open, and forgiving.


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So it went right, too."
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Re: Secrets Thread - Read first post!

Post by awkward-shark » Mon Oct 27, 2014 4:44 am

I'm bad dog owner.... I'm aware of that. "I don't have time" it's not an excuse. I do have time but I spend it somehow else. I didn't took him to the training classes at the park because I didn't wanted to go by myself because it would make me feel really really anxious and I didn't want to cry in front of a bunch of strangers that were judging me because I'm a super bad dog owner. I want to put him up for adoption but that's kind of hard here and it's not up to me only... but maybe we should... I don't even like to walk him, he's a huge dog and... being out... it's not easy. But that's not an excuse.
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Re: Secrets Thread - Read first post!

Post by Scatterbrain » Sun Nov 09, 2014 5:25 am

Believe it or not, I'm utterly terrified about my residency next semester. I have no fashion sense, no desire to try and I know nothing about make up and other feminine things. Somehow I gotta get it together so that they will take me seriously at work. I just wish that appearance didn't matter and I could do whatever I wanted. Why am I so defective and can't understand fashion and how to act like a normal 25 year old woman?? :( :(
"The impossible just takes a little longer."
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Re: Secrets Thread - Read first post!

Post by Spidey » Tue Nov 18, 2014 6:00 am

I don't know how to go on without you. I'm muddling through but I don't know what I'm doing.

I hurt in ways that no one could ever hope to comprehend. I feel untethered.

I don't know how to go on. How do I go on. Just give me a sign mok
there is, in the end, the letting go.
-marya hornbacher

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(spidey ever onward)

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Re: Secrets Thread - Read first post!

Post by Kaleb » Tue Feb 24, 2015 2:53 am

Massive anxiety attack .. I need to get this under control .. It's going too far .. I need to for my family
:purpstar: Hold Fast To Your Dreams, For If Dreams Die, Life Is a Broken Winged Bird, That Cannot Fly :purpstar:

If you think outside the box there's no such thing as square one.

No matter which sleeve you wear your heart,
Whichever way you wear your crown,
Tomorrow is another day to turn it all around
I will stop when I'm ready I'll shown everyone my cards
But for now I'll keep on playing even when the game gets hard.


:redstar: 19/07/1952 - 30/12/2013 Never Ever Forgotten :redstar:

13/05/14 - I Love Her

19/4/15 - The Day I Said Yes

17/06/17 - Rings swapped, Hearts interlocked

:moove: <-- Marlo & Mookau--> :moove:


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Re: Secrets Thread - Read first post!

Post by roseleaf » Tue Feb 24, 2015 11:47 pm

I don't think I even know what coping is any more. I don't understand the word.
For among these winters there is one so endlessly winter
that only by wintering through it all will your heart survive.
~Rainer Maria Rilke

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Re: Secrets Thread - Read first post!

Post by Kaleb » Wed Feb 25, 2015 12:31 am

I'm glad you're okay ... Stupid as it makes me ... I still worry.
:purpstar: Hold Fast To Your Dreams, For If Dreams Die, Life Is a Broken Winged Bird, That Cannot Fly :purpstar:

If you think outside the box there's no such thing as square one.

No matter which sleeve you wear your heart,
Whichever way you wear your crown,
Tomorrow is another day to turn it all around
I will stop when I'm ready I'll shown everyone my cards
But for now I'll keep on playing even when the game gets hard.


:redstar: 19/07/1952 - 30/12/2013 Never Ever Forgotten :redstar:

13/05/14 - I Love Her

19/4/15 - The Day I Said Yes

17/06/17 - Rings swapped, Hearts interlocked

:moove: <-- Marlo & Mookau--> :moove:


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Re: Secrets Thread - Read first post!

Post by treasure » Sat Feb 28, 2015 11:44 am

there's a grey area between a bad week and depressive episode that i have no idea how to communicate. i think i'm ok right now, i'm not going to hurt myself, but i think about it every day. that's over the line into depression, i think, but i feel unsure still, like it's still something i should take care of by myself. i am sharing with people, but they see me unsure and in this grey space, and i don't know how to get help without freaking people out.
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virtual hugs welcome.
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Re: Secrets Thread - Read first post!

Post by Selene » Mon Mar 23, 2015 9:41 pm

Sometimes I wonder if I'm a smart as everyone thinks I am.

That aside for the first time I'm truly happy with my life.
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Re: Secrets Thread - Read first post!

Post by StarChild » Sun Apr 05, 2015 8:37 pm

I want to have kids but I don't think anyone would want me as a parent.

Clean & sober since July 14, 2012.
SI free since January 29, 2016.
Cigarette free since May 12, 2017.

"i'm falling back in love with being alive."
- Kesha, "Rainbow"
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Selene
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Re: Secrets Thread - Read first post!

Post by Selene » Tue Apr 07, 2015 1:58 pm

So relieved.
I finally feel accepted for who I am.
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Re: Secrets Thread - Read first post!

Post by Spidey » Thu Apr 16, 2015 1:45 am

It is over.
there is, in the end, the letting go.
-marya hornbacher

spidey immer voran
(spidey ever onward)

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Re: Secrets Thread - Read first post!

Post by childofchaos831 » Thu Apr 16, 2015 3:34 am

Because of trauma, I am basically a sociopath. It happens sometimes, but it makes me feel like I am a bad person. Like I am capable of evil things.
"Do not be ashamed of the wars your soul has fought to save itself."
~isra al-thibeh

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Re: Secrets Thread - Read first post!

Post by moon raver » Mon Apr 20, 2015 12:01 am

:dkpurpstar: :purpstar: :lblstar: :grnstar: :ylwstar: :star: :redstar: rainbow confessions :redstar: :star: :ylwstar: :grnstar: :lblstar: :purpstar: :dkpurpstar:
:redstar: the only reason i haven't cut today is because my little brother drew a butterfly on my arm in sharpie
:star: i'm terrified of turning 18
:ylwstar: i've tried to kill myself 4 times in the past, the first two times i was disappointed when i didn't die
:grnstar: nobody knows that when i isolate i feel better, happier
:lblstar: i fear my girlfriend will leave me and i feel nothing but love for her
:purpstar: i have no idea who i am, right down to gender.
:dkpurpstar: love can't save me from myself
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Selene
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Re: Secrets Thread - Read first post!

Post by Selene » Sun May 31, 2015 5:57 pm

I would rather hurt myself than go to work tomorrow. I need an out
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Re: Secrets Thread - Read first post!

Post by moon raver » Sun May 31, 2015 9:48 pm

:redstar: last night i had an emotional breakdown because of my sexual assault
:star: i just want to starve myself, but i can not seem to stop eating, not for one second.
:ylwstar: i really hate myself for my weight and i just want to cut really badly
:grnstar: support forums like this, safe haven, ryl... they make me want to cut more so i can have something to contribute to the board like everybody else.
:lblstar: i want to fucking binge but i know i will hate myself if i eat tomorrow or the rest of the day today
:purpstar: the weirdest things trigger me, like knowing that i'm fat makes me want to binge more
:dkpurpstar: i want to cut
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Re: Secrets Thread - Read first post!

Post by moon raver » Mon Jun 01, 2015 1:25 pm

I FEEL LIKE I'VE EATEN TOO MUCH BUT I LOGICALLY KNOW I DIDN'T, I ATE A LOT OF FRUIT AND EVEN THAT MAKES ME FEEL FAT.
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Kaleb
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Re: Secrets Thread - Read first post!

Post by Kaleb » Mon Jun 08, 2015 5:44 pm

I'm feeling positive .. And better than I have in years .. That scares me a little bit.
:purpstar: Hold Fast To Your Dreams, For If Dreams Die, Life Is a Broken Winged Bird, That Cannot Fly :purpstar:

If you think outside the box there's no such thing as square one.

No matter which sleeve you wear your heart,
Whichever way you wear your crown,
Tomorrow is another day to turn it all around
I will stop when I'm ready I'll shown everyone my cards
But for now I'll keep on playing even when the game gets hard.


:redstar: 19/07/1952 - 30/12/2013 Never Ever Forgotten :redstar:

13/05/14 - I Love Her

19/4/15 - The Day I Said Yes

17/06/17 - Rings swapped, Hearts interlocked

:moove: <-- Marlo & Mookau--> :moove:


:morning: Caffiene Addict since 2004
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candor
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Re: Secrets Thread - Read first post!

Post by candor » Sun Jun 14, 2015 5:03 am

STOP ARGUING!!! There is a fucking point where you guys just need to not yell at each other or us for shifty things. Do you know how hard it is trying to keep you guys pleased? Doing a stupid sport because you want me to, not necessarily because I want to. Listening to your bickering in a freaking car for a lot of the day. Constant ARGUING. I want to tell you to your faces, but I've tried and it doesn't work...
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Re: Secrets Thread - Read first post!

Post by jadestarwalking » Sat Sep 05, 2015 3:00 am

I am thinking about being impulsive some how right now and it scares me
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Whether you think you can, or you think you can't, you're right.
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