no answers - AFTER

[ambivalent red]

Im not here to answer questions. I will try tho. I already SI'd. I know why. I was scared. I could only keep it from husband for 1 day. It was bad. I was scared about my T and losing her bacause insurance. But I didnt. My husband took me to the store to buy bandages and saftey stuff. I kept thinking that this will help on my next/future SI. He said "this is not for you to SI. This is for yor current SI."

I will try~


Why do you visit before and after?


What do you get out of it?
makes me mellow sometimess

What prompts you to think posting might be a good idea? i.e. what thought, feeling, or what happens
I needed to vent


Do you find the replies helpful in understanding what happened or what you might try in the future?


Have you had a go at putting what you've learnt into practise?

Have you noticed a decrease in your si since interacting with this forum?

Would you recommend this forum and activity of using quesitons to help deal with urges to others?

[ambivalent red]

I guess I didnt really try to look at the questions before. I said my peace. But I will try this time. Sometimes i dont like to look in the mirror. Of all my tools and I come accross my favorite. I miss it and wanna use it.




Before:

Before You Self-Harm
write down the shadow that's hiding behind the urge. look at it. ask yourself:
im scared about money. even tho we have my SSD back pay coming up.

• how will this situation or feeling change if i hurt myself?
  it will give me something to feel other than stress. I can have it all night.
• what will hurting myself bring to the situation? what will it take away from the situation?
• how do i want to feel about this in the long run? is hurting myself likely to get me closer to or farther from feeling that way?
• if hurting myself seems like my best option right now, how long will the relief it brings last? what will i do then?
  take care of it like a baby
• what is something i could do now instead of hurting myself? how will it change the situation i'm in? how long will that change last, and what will i do then?
  I am high, drunk and took many pills, that would do it, except mt husband is gone tonight.
  it leaves me all alone
• how will i feel tomorrow if i hurt myself? how will i feel tomorrow if i do the other thing i came up with?
  another scar...stay on bus and drink and smoke
• what do i really want to do right now? how can i best honor the self-protective instinct that has me wanting to self-injure right now?

I wanna SI, bad. I dont have a self protecrive instinct


urges aren't necessarily the enemy. they happen for reasons, and they're an expression of a desire to stay alive and stay sane and keep coping. remember that.

More Before Questions To Answer

• Why do I feel I need to hurt myself? What has brought me to this point?
• Have I been here before? What did I do to deal with it? How did I feel then?
• What I have done to ease this discomfort so far? What else can I do that won't hurt me?
• How do I feel right now?
• How will I feel when I am hurting myself?
• How will I feel after hurting myself? How will I feel tomorrow morning?
• Can I avoid this stressor, or deal with it better in the future?
• Do I need to hurt myself?

wanna