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Tips For Self-Care
by Kali Munro, M.Ed., Psychotherapist
In this day and age of fast living, it can be hard to take care of ourselves. But it's important to find even a few moments here and there where you can do something good for yourself. I've written out a few suggestions -- take what works for you, and discard the rest.
Take time for yourself.
Having time and space to ourselves can help us feel refreshed. Even finding just five minutes where you can close your eyes and focus on yourself can help you feel better. But if you can set aside a larger chunk of time where you only focus on yourself and what you need to do, that's even better.
Do something nice for your body.
It's easy to ignore our bodies aches and pains, or to forget to take care of ourselves. But we live in our bodies. Try taking a bath with some bath salts, get a massage, ask someone for a hug, or just stand up and stretch.
Find some comfort.
We all need comfort sometimes, and it's good to recognize when we do and try to get what we need. You can call a friend, make yourself something warm to drink, wrap yourself up in a blanket, hold a pillow or teddy bear, write in your journal, eat a particular comfort food (whatever food makes you feel good), or find a smell that brings you particular comfort (some common smells are cinnamon, vanilla, lavender, baby powder, lilacs, bread being baked, and coffee brewing).
Transport yourself into another world.
We all need a break sometimes from the realities of our world. You can curl up with a good book, movie, or magazine, or just let your mind drift where it wants to go.
Be playful or silly.
Being playful and silly can bring out the kid in us, and help us feel more light-hearted. You can blow some soap bubbles, throw confetti around, make cookies, blow a dandelion puff and make a wish, watch the clouds and make up ideas of what they look like, hug your dog, rollerblade down the sidewalk, or swing on the swings.
Take a mental health day.
When you need to really take care of yourself and you're fed up with work, take a day off work, and then do whatever you heart wants to. Make the day all about things you want to do. A mental health day can help more than a week of Sataurdays.
Take a walk in nature.
Sometimes we forget to notice the world around us. Reconnecting with nature can help us feel more grounded and calm. You can go for a walk in a park, look at and feel the trees, really notice the sky, and breathe.
Do something you've been wanting to for a long time.
Is there something you keep putting off for when you have more time, or for a better time? Why not do it now?
© Kali Munro, 2001
1. It does not matter if you feel frightened, bewildered, unreal, unsteady. These feelings are nothing more than an exaggeration of the normal bodily reactions to stress.
2. Just because you have these sensations doesn't mean you are very sick. These feelings are just unpleasant and frightening, not dangerous. Nothing worse will happen to you.
3. Let your feelings come. They've been in charge of you. You've been pumping them up and making them more acute. Stop pumping. Don't run away from panic. When you feel the panic mount, take a deep breath and, as you breathe out, let go. Keep trying. Stay there almost as if you were floating in space. Don't fight the feeling of panic. Accept it. You can do it.
4. Try to make yourself as comfortable as possible without escaping. If you're on a street, lean against a post or stone wall. If you're at the cosmetics department of the department store, find a quieter counter or corner. If you're in a boutique, tell the salesperson you don't feel well and want to sit for a while. Do not jump into a cab and go home in fear.
5. Stop adding to your panic with frightening thoughts about what is happening and where it might lead. Don't indulge in self-pity and think, "Why can't I be like all the other normal people? Why do I have to go through all this?" Just accept what is happening to you. If you do this, what you fear most will not happen.
6. Think about what is really happening to your body at this moment. Do not think, "Something terrible is going to happen. I must get out." Repeat to yourself, "I will not fall, faint, die, or lose control."
7. Now wait and give the fear time to pass. Do not run away. Others have found the strength. You will too. Notice that as you stop adding the frightening thoughts to your panic, the fear starts to fade away by itself
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8. This is your opportunity to practice. Think of it that way. Even if you feel isolated in space, one of these days you will not feel that way. Sometime soon you will be able to go through the panic and say, "I did it." Once you say this, you will have gone a long way toward conquering fear. Think about the progress you have already made. You are in the situation.
9. Try to distract yourself from what is going on inside you. Look at your surroundings. See the other people on the street, on the bus. They are with you, not against you
10. When the panic subsides, let your body go loose, take a deep breath, and go on with your day. Remember, each time you cope with a panic, you reduce your fear.
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