Strike Back of Secrets! [The Secrets Thread - Read 1st Post]

tips on how to cope: dealing with your feelings, dealing with the consequences of self-harm in your life. share your ideas and maybe pick up some new skills, too. you don't have to want to stop to learn something new here.

Moderators: Spidey, noldo

Locked
User avatar
DecemberLivy
just plain inspiring
just plain inspiring
Posts: 7474
Joined: Tue Sep 21, 2004 10:38 am
Location: London

Post by DecemberLivy » Sat Nov 01, 2008 10:16 am

I'm not crazy about him anymore. I don't know whats changed but somehow this life long crush has just fizzled out. But I feel I have to pretend to still be in love with him to keep his spirits up. I still do love him, in a sense, but I've realised what a mistake that is. I confused love for friendship.
<center>my walpole cafe

"My life's a mess"
"That's the way it's supposed to be" - soap -
</center>

I think I'll paint roads
on my front room walls
to convince myself
that I'm going places.

User avatar
acdcrocker1909
forum moderator emeritus
forum moderator emeritus
Posts: 10453
Joined: Fri Dec 10, 2004 3:42 am
Gender: Transguy
Location: Little Blue dot in a sea of Red

Post by acdcrocker1909 » Sat Nov 01, 2008 4:54 pm

I never knew what falling head over heels felt like.. now I think I do. And the scary thing is, I've fallen in love with a girl. And I can't tell anyone..

:bluestar:
It does not do to dwell on dreams, and forget to live - APWBD.


Music is life.. we each have our own symphony.. and we control it for the most part.. sometimes instruments drop out.. and others join in.. but when the music fades and the symphony is done.. then we have created a beautiful, personal piece. - Me.

Less Traveled Roads <-- Everyone Welcome.

Image

User avatar
kgraff
meeting the neighbors
meeting the neighbors
Posts: 385
Joined: Tue Sep 23, 2008 10:02 pm
Location: Maine

Post by kgraff » Sun Nov 02, 2008 11:55 pm

sometimes the only reason i dont kill myself is because of you, because im in love with you. but i cant tell you because your a girl and you can never love me back.

i want to tell you everything. my dad hits me. im anorexic, i cut...alot, i take lots of pills, and drink by myself to ingnore my pain and i think about SU all the time.

but if i did tell you then whatever small chance that you could love me like i love you would be gone. im so alone
PM box wide open
and I LOVE HUGS!!!!

My PLace~~~~
http://buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php?t=128510

My writings and stuff~~~
http://buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php?t=129393

User avatar
ambivalent red
growing roots
growing roots
Posts: 768
Joined: Wed Aug 20, 2008 7:58 pm
Location: buried deep inside of me

Post by ambivalent red » Mon Nov 03, 2008 6:27 pm

I want to move in with my best friend. I love my husband, but I think we want different things.
There's no where to run
There's no where to hide
From what's in your mind - It's a Ghetto
-Supreme Beings Leisure

User avatar
steady hands
quintessential regular
quintessential regular
Posts: 2245
Joined: Fri Sep 02, 2005 2:05 am

Post by steady hands » Wed Nov 05, 2008 2:02 am

ugh

I hate being sick.
hate hate hate.
I need to eat healthily to get over this.

I don't know if I can handle that.

User avatar
VowsOfSadness
sock rocker
sock rocker
Posts: 3975
Joined: Sat Dec 04, 2004 1:33 am
Gender: Female
Location: Pittsburgh, PA AGE:20
Contact:

Post by VowsOfSadness » Wed Nov 05, 2008 5:28 am

I've always had this thing where I wanted to get you, I wanted you to fall for me, even though I didn't "like" you that way and knew you were dating another friend. And then unexpectedly we became best friends and its as if I still stive to have you fall in love with me EVEN THOUGH you are STILL in this relationship. And maybe the more I deny the fact that subconciously I am trying to get you to fall for me the more I fall for you on some level.

WHAT IS THIS. god this is bad news
*Challenges welcome*
I always love a :lpurpstar:

I woke up this morning, I suddenly realized we're all in this together.

Drop by my place & say hi :)
Ask me anything!!!

I'm fully Recovered!

User avatar
Dorky&Weird2
part of the fixtures
part of the fixtures
Posts: 2386
Joined: Thu Sep 11, 2008 6:39 am
Gender: Chicka~Age:19
Location: New England,Usa

Post by Dorky&Weird2 » Wed Nov 05, 2008 6:30 am

i think ur really cute and funny and i wish you would have flirted with me instead of someone 6yrs older than you,i know shes 100 times prettier than me but i still wonder if you will ever like me
:1hug: & PM's are ok with me!
~My Place-*She* will be ~Loved~...{SI}
LAST SI-{2/8/10} :clover:<1year>
Image
R.I.P.-Steve Irwin-9/4/06<3
"They took her moments of feeling alive,And made them moments of dying inside."~Annie-SafetySuit
~Tree Avvy made by the wonderful WDS
I love my cats :cystar: :cat4: :cystar:

User avatar
kgraff
meeting the neighbors
meeting the neighbors
Posts: 385
Joined: Tue Sep 23, 2008 10:02 pm
Location: Maine

Post by kgraff » Thu Nov 06, 2008 4:24 am

i hate myself so much. it makes sicude feel like a good option. like the only option
PM box wide open
and I LOVE HUGS!!!!

My PLace~~~~
http://buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php?t=128510

My writings and stuff~~~
http://buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php?t=129393

User avatar
acdcrocker1909
forum moderator emeritus
forum moderator emeritus
Posts: 10453
Joined: Fri Dec 10, 2004 3:42 am
Gender: Transguy
Location: Little Blue dot in a sea of Red

Post by acdcrocker1909 » Thu Nov 06, 2008 6:54 am

I have fallen in love with a girl, and I don't give a flying fuck what people think at the moment. But, I am terrified my brain will kick in with "you dumbass" and rattle off how fucked I am due to loving an amazing woman.

:bluestar:
It does not do to dwell on dreams, and forget to live - APWBD.


Music is life.. we each have our own symphony.. and we control it for the most part.. sometimes instruments drop out.. and others join in.. but when the music fades and the symphony is done.. then we have created a beautiful, personal piece. - Me.

Less Traveled Roads <-- Everyone Welcome.

Image

User avatar
Never Again
quintessential regular
quintessential regular
Posts: 2069
Joined: Mon Dec 27, 2004 3:55 am
Location: USA

Post by Never Again » Thu Nov 06, 2008 6:58 am

i feel like i'm a different species. i have never fit in, ever. and i dont expect that i'll ever find someone who will understand me, or put up with me. i can't even find someone to pay to listen to me. i call my mom to talk about regular stuff, but i know she only talks because she feels obligated because she's my mom. i feel like the most gigantic loser ever.
I have love. I have love but I don't know where to put it.

User avatar
caged bird
board admin emeritus
board admin emeritus
Posts: 22909
Joined: Mon Jul 15, 2002 2:51 pm
Location: UK Age 24
Contact:

Post by caged bird » Thu Nov 06, 2008 1:12 pm

i have more self hatred then i ever thought was humanly possible
visit my website
My Place

Being almost devastated is horrible because it lingers. But total devastation brings a kind of peace. It lets you give up.
Thieves and Kings: Volume Two by Mark Oakly

The line between normal and crazy seemed impossibly thin. A person would have to be an expert tightrope walker in order not to fall.
Running with scissors - Augusten Burroughs

User avatar
vampirelover
spiffy maximus
spiffy maximus
Posts: 4149
Joined: Tue Apr 17, 2007 8:45 pm
Gender: F
Location: London ish(England), age : 21

Post by vampirelover » Thu Nov 06, 2008 2:35 pm

your the only thing keeping me from slipping back , but im afraid thats not enough
longest with no slips - 2 years , 6 months
time since last slip : 2 days

User avatar
red umbrellas
beyond inspiring
beyond inspiring
Posts: 8175
Joined: Mon Mar 01, 2004 8:50 am
Location: Sydney

Post by red umbrellas » Fri Nov 07, 2008 3:35 am

the three things i need most seem to be the things i will never, ever have
It's all life and fire and lunacy
And excuses and excuses and excuses

Hold On To Yourself - Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds

"We paint a picture of a scenario - and then we become afraid of it" - Andrea Fella

User avatar
Geordie
sprouting branches
sprouting branches
Posts: 1159
Joined: Fri Jan 11, 2008 12:21 pm
Location: Australia
Contact:

Post by Geordie » Fri Nov 07, 2008 10:39 am

I really want her out of my life. I lied about it just being a 'personality clash' between us. I HATE her. And she hates me. I don't know how you missed this.

I hate her because she's an immature, manipulative, selfish bitch. And because she has you.
*HUGS WELCOME* *PMs AWESOME*

http://buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php?t=120671
My place

Not well. Never well. Never will?

User avatar
fadingbutterfly
bus mechanic
bus mechanic
Posts: 3198
Joined: Sat Aug 25, 2007 9:34 pm

Post by fadingbutterfly » Fri Nov 07, 2008 2:23 pm

I'm more suicidal at the moment than I have been in 5 years.

User avatar
ambivalent red
growing roots
growing roots
Posts: 768
Joined: Wed Aug 20, 2008 7:58 pm
Location: buried deep inside of me

Post by ambivalent red » Fri Nov 07, 2008 10:52 pm

I want the phone call to say 'I'm outside- lets go!'
There's no where to run
There's no where to hide
From what's in your mind - It's a Ghetto
-Supreme Beings Leisure

User avatar
Geordie
sprouting branches
sprouting branches
Posts: 1159
Joined: Fri Jan 11, 2008 12:21 pm
Location: Australia
Contact:

Post by Geordie » Sat Nov 08, 2008 12:40 am

I think I'm too lazy to live.
*HUGS WELCOME* *PMs AWESOME*

http://buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php?t=120671
My place

Not well. Never well. Never will?

User avatar
VowsOfSadness
sock rocker
sock rocker
Posts: 3975
Joined: Sat Dec 04, 2004 1:33 am
Gender: Female
Location: Pittsburgh, PA AGE:20
Contact:

Post by VowsOfSadness » Sat Nov 08, 2008 1:08 am

surprise surprise my secret is about the same person as the last secret I posted was about so lets just make this blunt

I've fallen for my best friend & she is taken.
and I'm sure there is some reason I am a horrible person because of it
*Challenges welcome*
I always love a :lpurpstar:

I woke up this morning, I suddenly realized we're all in this together.

Drop by my place & say hi :)
Ask me anything!!!

I'm fully Recovered!

User avatar
Geordie
sprouting branches
sprouting branches
Posts: 1159
Joined: Fri Jan 11, 2008 12:21 pm
Location: Australia
Contact:

Post by Geordie » Sat Nov 08, 2008 3:42 am

I lied about everything.
*HUGS WELCOME* *PMs AWESOME*

http://buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php?t=120671
My place

Not well. Never well. Never will?

User avatar
acdcrocker1909
forum moderator emeritus
forum moderator emeritus
Posts: 10453
Joined: Fri Dec 10, 2004 3:42 am
Gender: Transguy
Location: Little Blue dot in a sea of Red

Post by acdcrocker1909 » Sun Nov 09, 2008 6:10 am

I don't want you to join me at my college. I love you to death, but I don't know if having you around will be good.

:bluestar:
It does not do to dwell on dreams, and forget to live - APWBD.


Music is life.. we each have our own symphony.. and we control it for the most part.. sometimes instruments drop out.. and others join in.. but when the music fades and the symphony is done.. then we have created a beautiful, personal piece. - Me.

Less Traveled Roads <-- Everyone Welcome.

Image

Locked

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 105 guests