before

[Stormy Llwellyn]

•how will this situation or feeling change if i hurt myself?

It' won't. The situation is out of my control. I hate having someone taking control of my feelings, life, and decsions.

•what will hurting myself bring to the situation? what will it take away from the situation?

Absolutely nothing. I don't know if it will erase the memories or not.

•how do i want to feel about this in the long run? is hurting myself likely to get me closer to or farther from feeling that way?

Numb. I believe it will get me closer because I feel numb after, but then there is the feeling of regret and remorse, and shame.

•if hurting myself seems like my best option right now, how long will the relief it brings last? what will i do then?

The relief is only temporary. The more I hurt myself the more I need. I go deeper more and more and after I get more afraid.

•what is something i could do now instead of hurting myself? how will it change the situation i'm in? how long will that change last, and what will i do then?

Listen to music, go for a drive, call someone, but they don't get it. The situation may take away the urges but I can't be for sure when I go to sleep. As far as what will I do then? Probably pace the house all night.

•how will i feel tomorrow if i hurt myself? how will i feel tomorrow if i do the other thing i came up with?

Like holy crap, because I will have to work in long sleeves. Tired, Unable to focus.



•what do i really want to do right now? how can i best honor the self-protective instinct that has me wanting to self-injure right now?


Run and hide away from the people who are triggering me. Get in the car and drive.

[Spidey]

•how will this situation or feeling change if i hurt myself?

It' won't. The situation is out of my control. I hate having someone taking control of my feelings, life, and decsions.

Sometimes things happen that are out of your control - unfortunately, that's a part of life, although it sucks even more when it's someone you don't want taking control of things. Is there a way that you can either gain control of the situation, or your feelings? Situations are sometimes in others' hands, but more often than not, feelings are in yours.

Take a deep breath.

•what will hurting myself bring to the situation? what will it take away from the situation?

Absolutely nothing. I don't know if it will erase the memories or not.

•how do i want to feel about this in the long run? is hurting myself likely to get me closer to or farther from feeling that way?

Numb. I believe it will get me closer because I feel numb after, but then there is the feeling of regret and remorse, and shame.

•if hurting myself seems like my best option right now, how long will the relief it brings last? what will i do then?

The relief is only temporary. The more I hurt myself the more I need. I go deeper more and more and after I get more afraid.

These are all very, very good answers as to why you should think of re-directing your urge to SI. I know that right now you're in a grrr place, where hurting yourself seems like a very legitimate opportunity, but I encourage you to read your answers to these questions - I think you're on the right track in terms of dealing with this urge. Awesome

•what is something i could do now instead of hurting myself? how will it change the situation i'm in? how long will that change last, and what will i do then?

Listen to music, go for a drive, call someone, but they don't get it. The situation may take away the urges but I can't be for sure when I go to sleep. As far as what will I do then? Probably pace the house all night.

A quote I learned in recovery: Don't borrow worries. Go to sleep, and deal with tomorrow, tomorrow. If you can't sleep now, watch fun YouTube videos (I highly recommend Mishka the Talking Husky, Maru, Daym Drops Food Reviews, or just searching for funny cat/dog/rat videos)

•how will i feel tomorrow if i hurt myself? how will i feel tomorrow if i do the other thing i came up with?

Like holy crap, because I will have to work in long sleeves. Tired, Unable to focus.

•what do i really want to do right now? how can i best honor the self-protective instinct that has me wanting to self-injure right now?


Run and hide away from the people who are triggering me. Get in the car and drive.

I'd rather choose a day tired than a day in long sleeves, but it's hot as heck out here and that's just me.

Is driving a viable option right now? If not, what other things can you do besides SI that will help you? Would going to sleep now work, watching YT videos, punching pillows? I'd like you to challenge yourself and post three alternatives besides SI and driving that you can do right now. It can be as simple as petting your pet (if you have one) or as complicated as taking something apart and putting it back together again.