ED Recovery Advice

[-manda-]

Not really sure where this goes exactly, but oh wells.....

I just don't know what to do right now. I know I need to get better, but don't meet the ED requirements anymore for an official diagnosis and a treatment plan, that I know of anyway. I'm not underweight and my weight doesn't really bounce around. I have the mind of an anorexic/bulimic but not the body, and basically cannot get help unless I go to a psych that specializes in EDs, which I have no idea where to find one. And besides, it's too expensive and my parents insurance doesn't cover any kind of treatment, whether it be IP or OP. I feel stuck, which makes me feel out of control, which makes me want to restrict/purge. Anyone have any advice on what I should do? I want to get better before this gets way out of control, but I know alot of people won't think I have a problem since I'm not underweight/super skinny. I really need help, and would appreciate any kind of advice. Thanks -x-hugs-x-

[NobodyToYou]

I think any professional worth the name would take your situation quite seriously. EDs are not really about the person's body, they are really more concerned with the person's mind (and then what the actions do to the body). A diagnosis of bulimia has no weight requirement at all. Most people with bulimia are normal or slightly overweight, and it is still a very real disorder. Anyone familiar with eating disorders is going to understand that they are an issue, no matter what weight the person is. You probably wouldn't have to be involuntarily hospitalized at a normal weight since you aren't in as much physical danger... but you don't have to be underweight to get help. People who are struggling but don't meet the specific diagnosis for anorexia or bulimia can still get help, and they often use the diagnosis of Eating disorder not otherwise specified.

As far as where to get help... I know there is a message board for ED issues that some people have used, but I can't remember the address. The name was... um... somethingfishy? Maybe? I really don't remember.

I don't know what is available where you live, but one way to find a T in your area is to search things like "mental health provider" with your city, or to look at the licensing information for your area (in the US, it is done by state). Many people in private practice have a website. The other thing to look for is "sliding scale fees" which means that they will reduce the price if you don't have a lot of income... it may not be enough, but it can make therapy much more affordable and there are usually several places that offer it in any decent sized city. You would still want to try to find someone with experience working with people with eating disorders, but you probably don't need someone who does ONLY eating disorders... as long as they are familiar with how to help, it is ok if they do other things as well. The important thing is to find someone you can afford who you think you can work with.

As far as other options, I would look into workbooks, or see what books on ED recovery might be at your local library. Then you could get a feel for several different books without having to pay for them unless you think they will be useful.

I hope some other people comment with more ideas... that is about all I have come up with so far. But there are options out there for you, even without a lot of money and you DO deserve to be taken seriously. You don't need to let things get worse to prove to other people that you need help.

[imoverit2007]

I don't know what to tell you about the cost part, other than to look into the sliding scale places, but you definitely can get some help without falling into the exact definition of an ED. In fact, it's definitely better if you recognize some of the disordered behaviors in yourself and you're interested in getting help before it does develop into a full-fledged ED. Good for you to recognize it and for being motivated to change!! There shouldn't be a single T out there who will turn you away for that just because you don't weigh 95lbs. Basically, I just wanted to reassure you, from personal experience, that there are plenty of professionals willing and wanting to help people out with EDs "in the making", which it sounds like is what you're dealing with. Just because you don't fit in an anorexic or bulimic box perfectly doesn't mean that there isn't help available, and it sounds like you're really motivated. Good on you for that!!

[badgirl22]

Its great that you want to recover. Its great that you want to change. Wish I was there. A little tiny part of me is but the ed voice is so loud it just drowns all that out. Its great that you are seeking help for it. You deserve it. Just don't give up like I did.
-Badgirl22

[joangel]

Eating disorders are MENTAL disorders with physical consequences. Despite the stereotype, you don't have to be emaciated to have issues with food. Good treatment providers know this. I know I've been sicker mentally and emotionally when I was at a healthy weight than when I was really underweight. You deserve to live without thoughts about food and weight plaguing you.

Good luck!

[jaded melody]

I think you need to talk to your parents about finding you some professional help. If their insurane won't cover it, then together you need to find a way of paying for it. Yes, it is expensive, but, as my mother always said to me when she paid for my private medical care, your health is SO much more important than money. If they have such little money that it would leave them unable to pay the bills, then you ought to qualify for some sort of financial aid or medicare.

Seeing a psychiatrist who specialises in eating disorders is a good start, since you need to be completely evaluated to make sure there's not some other psychiatric issues going on, like depression, for which you could need medication. You don't necessarily have to see them more than once. If your problem is an ED, they can refer you to a therapist for your actual treatment, and that is generally cheaper than seeing a psychiatrist. Most psychiatrists do not actually offer psychotherapy.

Apart from that, I would do a search for self-help groups in your area which are run by charities. They tend to be free of charge, and talking to other people with the same problems can be really helpful. I cannot more highly recommend a book called "Life Without ED" by Jenni Schaefer. It's a really honest but non-triggering and very helpful recovery-orientated book. You can also try reading about Cognitive Behavioural techniques - online or in books. They can be very useful.

Good luck. x

[-manda-]

Thank you everyone for all the advice!!! After attempting suicide twice in one weekend, they took me to Laureate in Tulsa and now I'm doing OP treatment for my mood swings and we're working on my ED as well. I got diagnosed by my Pdoc as Bulimic, Depressive Disorder NOS,and Anxiety Disorder NOS for initial dxs. I will keep you all updated on how I'm doing!

-manda-