slips are chances to learn. you figure out what stresses are still too hard for you and you can work on how you'll deal with them next time you run into them. so instead of beating yourself up, take action.
- have you taken care of your physical wounds? if not, go do that now. we'll wait. Yesterday
- what had happened just before?
can't say - what were you thinking and feeling?
I was disgusted with how I have been acting. - why did you end up hurting yourself then instead of some other time? was there an event that was the final straw? what was it?
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Yes there was and no I can't "reenacting my first SA/SI" - how did the situation get to the final straw stage? trace it back through the events that led up to the last event. look for some point at which you could have made a different decision and not arrived at the final straw.By not acting out sexually after I had been sober for a while.
- were there outside factors like drugs, alsohol, being off your meds, lack of sleep, etc? can you address those in the future? how?
no - what other ways of coping did you try besides self-harm? how well did they work?
acted out. They didn't they just delivered me to SI ing. - in retrospect, are there coping methods that you now realize might have helped? what were they?
no - name at least two things you will do to help yourself remember those coping methods if you end up in this situation again.
- how do you feel about the situation that led to self-harm now? is it resolved? if not, what are some steps you might take toward resolution?
- are you likely to be in that emotional place again? how will you recognize it when you're in that situation?
probably I am naked - what will you try before you resort to self-harm if you're in that situation again? list three specific things you will commit to trying.
About Opportunities to SI
Opportunity to Self-Harm seems to be a common theme. Think about why opportunities are important to slips and learn why opportunity is important to you.
- What made that opportunity more appealing than any other?
Had the house to myself - Did you make an opportunity or was it there for the taking?
It was there - What would you have done if there was no opportunity, how would you have handled your urge?
I would not have had the urge - If there had been no opportunity would your urge to self-harm have increased or decreased?
decrease - What consitutes opportunity for you? Being alone? having new tools? waiting for the right feeling?
Alone and disgusted with my actions - If your opportunties were taken away, how would you feel?
After You Beat an Urge
How do you beat your urges? Examine how you beat the last one so it can help you beat the next one.
- Did I identify what feelings were leading me to want to SI?
yes - If Yes - What were they, and how did I figure them out?
humiliation and disgust - What coping skills did I use to deal with these feelings?
- Were these coping skills the most effective I could have used?
- If No - What coping skills got me through?
- Why do I think they worked?
- How can I deal with these feelings more effectively next time, before the urge to SI sets in?
