Before You Self-Harm
write down the shadow that's hiding behind the urge. look at it. ask yourself:
- how will this situation or feeling change if i hurt myself?
The feeling will change a lot. I am hoping I won't feel so down. That I will just feel calm. - what will hurting myself bring to the situation? what will it take away from the situation?
SI will take away 12 days of being SI free. It will bring that calm and content feeling. - how do i want to feel about this in the long run? is hurting myself likely to get me closer to or farther from feeling that way?
I don't want to feel like I have tto SI. I want to feel in control of my life any myself. - if hurting myself seems like my best option right now, how long will the relief it brings last? what will i do then?
It will last for a few hours. Then I won't be alone anymore. - what is something i could do now instead of hurting myself? how will it change the situation i'm in? how long will that change last, and what will i do then?
Go have a warm cup of tea or hot chocolate. Stay here and read the boards. Cuddle with my dogs. It won't change the situation, but it might change the feeling. - how will i feel tomorrow if i hurt myself? how will i feel tomorrow if i do the other thing i came up with?
Like a failure. Completely out of control. If I do the other thing I won't feel better, but I won't feel worse. - what do i really want to do right now? how can i best honor the self-protective instinct that has me wanting to self-injure right now?
I want to get out of here. I want to run away from everything.
More Before Questions To Answer
- Why do I feel I need to hurt myself? What has brought me to this point?
I have felt this way for a few days. I just can't shake the urge. I talked to some people from my past and it is making me nervous and urgey. - Have I been here before? What did I do to deal with it? How did I feel then?
I have been here before and I didn't cut. I just dissociated. I don't want to do that either. - What I have done to ease this discomfort so far? What else can I do that won't hurt me?
Came on here. I can try some self soothing. - How do I feel right now?
Like I might be able to get through this without cutting. - How will I feel when I am hurting myself?
Relieved and calm. - How will I feel after hurting myself? How will I feel tomorrow morning?
- Can I avoid this stressor, or deal with it better in the future?
Yes. Avoiding the people and situations that make me nervous and make my head all swirley inside (i don't know how else to describe the feeling). - Do I need to hurt myself?
I don't know. I will try other things before I resort to SI.
