Things Left Unsaid *LA*
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- bus mechanic
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Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA*
seeing you today braught all my old feelings back. thanks. not helpful.
PBH, Telling my parents, My place - All welcome [hugs, stars, challenges, questions are all ok
In the end, it doesnt matter where you have been or who you were,
it only matters who you want to be and where you want to end up.
[Working Towards Recovery]
*I can do all things through christ who strengthens me, Philippians 4:13*
In the end, it doesnt matter where you have been or who you were,
it only matters who you want to be and where you want to end up.
[Working Towards Recovery]
*I can do all things through christ who strengthens me, Philippians 4:13*
Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA*
Please, come back
- capricorn
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Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA*
Meh, I guess I'm not allowed friends then.
I spose I know the way things are ...
I spose I know the way things are ...
~Capri
xoxo
"Awake and unafraid."
My Chemical Romance
"I am haunted by humans."
The Book Thief
"Been trying hard not to get into trouble, but I've got a war in my mind."
Lana Del Rey
"It's always darkest just before the dawn. So stay awake with me. Let's prove them wrong."
Rise Against
"I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain."
Dune
xoxo
"Awake and unafraid."
My Chemical Romance
"I am haunted by humans."
The Book Thief
"Been trying hard not to get into trouble, but I've got a war in my mind."
Lana Del Rey
"It's always darkest just before the dawn. So stay awake with me. Let's prove them wrong."
Rise Against
"I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain."
Dune
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- bus mechanic
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- Contact:
Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA*
you fustrate me. can't you see whats been done for you? the sacrifices that have been made? your free!! your standing in prison when the door is so wide open!! i know things are hard, but just walk into what god has for you, and stop spinning the pity stories and standing like a vegatable in church. its a celebration because he died for you, hes done all the work, all for you, and you dont even appreciate it. its difficult to watch, but i have no choice. please, open your eyes.
PBH, Telling my parents, My place - All welcome [hugs, stars, challenges, questions are all ok
In the end, it doesnt matter where you have been or who you were,
it only matters who you want to be and where you want to end up.
[Working Towards Recovery]
*I can do all things through christ who strengthens me, Philippians 4:13*
In the end, it doesnt matter where you have been or who you were,
it only matters who you want to be and where you want to end up.
[Working Towards Recovery]
*I can do all things through christ who strengthens me, Philippians 4:13*
- stripysocks4christ
- awe-inspiring
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Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA*
i hate how none of you can ever understand how hard it is for me. to stand there while you all sing and praise god. when i feel nothing. how hard it is for me to just make it through each service. cos unlike you guys, im not perfect. not at all. i believe in god, sure, but there is so much more you wouldnt understand. i know you think im being stupid and childish or whatever, and maybe i am. but i have my reasons. and before you ask - im NOT going to share them with you.
and you - how did we get here? things were so good now look at us. i dont like being in a friendship revolves around jealousy and fighting. im not sure how much more i can take...
and you - how did we get here? things were so good now look at us. i dont like being in a friendship revolves around jealousy and fighting. im not sure how much more i can take...
"Good friends lift you up when your wings forget to fly"
"Let Go and Let God"
"God will never let us fall without a plan on how to save us"
"For I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength" – Philippians 4:13
"I only lied so I didn't have to see the tears of disappointment in your eyes"
"I don't want the world to see me, cos I don't think that they'd understand..."
xx Kitti xx
my place
my poems
Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA*
*SI, Sex*
You drive me batshit crazy. I dreamed of kissing you last night, as I have done several times before. It drives me mad, knowing the sensation in my mind, yet never knowing it truly. I feel like a teenager again, driven by hormones. Yet, here I am, gone mad by the thought of you. I want your kisses, your hands, your breast and heartbeat. Your love. It's so ridiculous and embarrasses me immensely. I can only say it here.
Strangely, oh so strangely, it makes me want to walk through the walkways covered by a thousand cuts. Bleeding and bleeding until this madness is gone from me. An angel of destructive lunacy. I never would, never could, but it seems fitting.
You drive me batshit crazy. I dreamed of kissing you last night, as I have done several times before. It drives me mad, knowing the sensation in my mind, yet never knowing it truly. I feel like a teenager again, driven by hormones. Yet, here I am, gone mad by the thought of you. I want your kisses, your hands, your breast and heartbeat. Your love. It's so ridiculous and embarrasses me immensely. I can only say it here.
Strangely, oh so strangely, it makes me want to walk through the walkways covered by a thousand cuts. Bleeding and bleeding until this madness is gone from me. An angel of destructive lunacy. I never would, never could, but it seems fitting.
Eisa = Beasty's Twin
Beasty's Place!
- Licentia Poetica
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Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA*
Oy, BITCH
You don't go through my bag
You don't go through my stuff
You don't ransack my room while I'm at work
You don't try to turn my family against me
and
You don't rely on me for money
GET IT THROUGH YOUR FUCKING HEAD.
You don't go through my bag
You don't go through my stuff
You don't ransack my room while I'm at work
You don't try to turn my family against me
and
You don't rely on me for money
GET IT THROUGH YOUR FUCKING HEAD.
If we knew each other's secrets, what comforts we should find.
John Churton Collins
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- bus mechanic
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Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA*
this doesnt seem like a good idea, but i just cant help it
i dont wanna hurt anyone
i dont wanna hurt anyone
PBH, Telling my parents, My place - All welcome [hugs, stars, challenges, questions are all ok
In the end, it doesnt matter where you have been or who you were,
it only matters who you want to be and where you want to end up.
[Working Towards Recovery]
*I can do all things through christ who strengthens me, Philippians 4:13*
In the end, it doesnt matter where you have been or who you were,
it only matters who you want to be and where you want to end up.
[Working Towards Recovery]
*I can do all things through christ who strengthens me, Philippians 4:13*
- Descent
- creating your space
- Posts: 191
- Joined: Sat Feb 19, 2011 10:01 pm
- Gender: Female
- Location: United States
Today was so much better than I ever could have hoped.
I've never felt this way. You make my life amazing.
I've never felt this way. You make my life amazing.
♥ "Don't follow your dreams; chase them." ♥
♥ "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." ♥
♥ "There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so." ♥
-->*My Place* *My PBH*<--
- My Hazey Clarity
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Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA*
Yes my life will be better after you pass away. It will allow me a way to finally let all it go with off with you. I dont like the pain i always feel even thinking about you and the love you denied your own child. Its just not enough to be out of my life, i really need you gone for good. So i can finally be free.
If you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.
~ Friedrich Nietzsche
Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go.
~ T. S. Eliot
~ Friedrich Nietzsche
Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go.
~ T. S. Eliot
Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA*
Thinking back - I now realise what a bad girlfriend I was .....
I was just so insecure and so shy and so worried about the repercussions of what would happen if I did something.
That I guess got too much ....
I wish I could go back to that time and be the person I am now ..... cause I don't take any crap from anyone anymore .... I tell them to go to hell and leave me alone, and I could have stood up for us how I should have, could have told all the haters where to go without worrying and could have been a decent girlfriend.
But everything happens for a reason - lives that crossed separate and sometimes they cross over again and sometimes they stay apart, sometimes thats for the best.
I just wish I could time travel, I was happy then. I wish we could still have those convos where we used fridges and dinosaurs as code words ... cause they were the best - or those long talks just sat together sharing our deepest secrets and our biggest hopes and dreams, or where we could sit in class and scare the pants off the teacher cause we could finish eachothers sentences, even regarding work - or with the 'you go' 'no its okay you go' thing in Mr B's class about who would answer first and the look on their faces. times that even when I think about them now .... I smile. I wish I could go back and be the person I am now.
I was just so insecure and so shy and so worried about the repercussions of what would happen if I did something.
That I guess got too much ....
I wish I could go back to that time and be the person I am now ..... cause I don't take any crap from anyone anymore .... I tell them to go to hell and leave me alone, and I could have stood up for us how I should have, could have told all the haters where to go without worrying and could have been a decent girlfriend.
But everything happens for a reason - lives that crossed separate and sometimes they cross over again and sometimes they stay apart, sometimes thats for the best.
I just wish I could time travel, I was happy then. I wish we could still have those convos where we used fridges and dinosaurs as code words ... cause they were the best - or those long talks just sat together sharing our deepest secrets and our biggest hopes and dreams, or where we could sit in class and scare the pants off the teacher cause we could finish eachothers sentences, even regarding work - or with the 'you go' 'no its okay you go' thing in Mr B's class about who would answer first and the look on their faces. times that even when I think about them now .... I smile. I wish I could go back and be the person I am now.
If you think outside the box there's no such thing as square one.
No matter which sleeve you wear your heart,
Whichever way you wear your crown,
Tomorrow is another day to turn it all around
I will stop when I'm ready I'll shown everyone my cards
But for now I'll keep on playing even when the game gets hard.
19/07/1952 - 30/12/2013 Never Ever Forgotten
13/05/14 - I Love Her
19/4/15 - The Day I Said Yes
17/06/17 - Rings swapped, Hearts interlocked
<-- Marlo & Mookau-->
Caffiene Addict since 2004
- Stawberry_Lollipops
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Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA*
I am so disappointed in you. I couldn't even begin to describe how disappointed I am.
I really thought that maybe you'd be okay with it. Just maybe you could be open-minded and
see it for what it is. See past all the prejudices and just see me as a girl in love.
I know now that you would never be able to accept that part of me so there is no point in
even telling you. Why should I put myself through that grief?
But I just thought...maybe you'd be okay with it and I'd be able to share with you, this
wonderful relationship, this wonderful love, this wonderful person I have in my life. I thought
maybe I'd actually be able to sit with you and tell you all about my first true love and how
happy they make me. How content I feel in her arms. You always said, you wanted me to
share that with you and I always thought we would. It saddens me greatly that we'll
never get that opportunity to be honest and open. That you'll never get to be happy for
me. That I'll have to keep on hiding and keeping everything a secret. I really had hope that
you wouldn't be judgemental but I realise now I was living in a fantasy world. I was naive to
ever think you could accept me as a bisexual woman. I'm so sorry you'll never get to know
that part of me or experience this part of my life.
I am so sorry mum. But this is who I am and I can't change that. It's your loss in the end.
I really thought that maybe you'd be okay with it. Just maybe you could be open-minded and
see it for what it is. See past all the prejudices and just see me as a girl in love.
I know now that you would never be able to accept that part of me so there is no point in
even telling you. Why should I put myself through that grief?
But I just thought...maybe you'd be okay with it and I'd be able to share with you, this
wonderful relationship, this wonderful love, this wonderful person I have in my life. I thought
maybe I'd actually be able to sit with you and tell you all about my first true love and how
happy they make me. How content I feel in her arms. You always said, you wanted me to
share that with you and I always thought we would. It saddens me greatly that we'll
never get that opportunity to be honest and open. That you'll never get to be happy for
me. That I'll have to keep on hiding and keeping everything a secret. I really had hope that
you wouldn't be judgemental but I realise now I was living in a fantasy world. I was naive to
ever think you could accept me as a bisexual woman. I'm so sorry you'll never get to know
that part of me or experience this part of my life.
I am so sorry mum. But this is who I am and I can't change that. It's your loss in the end.
* ~ * ~ * ~ *
“There is no use trying,” said Alice; “One can’t believe impossible things!”
“I dare say you haven’t had much practise,” said the Queen. “When I was your age, I always did it for half an hour a day
Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast.” - Lewis Carroll
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- bus mechanic
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Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA*
this isnt worth the pain and hurt its gonna cause everyone. im not worth it, your not worth it. why are we in this? you dont even like me, you like A. and yet you have power over me, i cant help it. please, break this spell.
PBH, Telling my parents, My place - All welcome [hugs, stars, challenges, questions are all ok
In the end, it doesnt matter where you have been or who you were,
it only matters who you want to be and where you want to end up.
[Working Towards Recovery]
*I can do all things through christ who strengthens me, Philippians 4:13*
In the end, it doesnt matter where you have been or who you were,
it only matters who you want to be and where you want to end up.
[Working Towards Recovery]
*I can do all things through christ who strengthens me, Philippians 4:13*
- Descent
- creating your space
- Posts: 191
- Joined: Sat Feb 19, 2011 10:01 pm
- Gender: Female
- Location: United States
I'm terrified that this won't last.
I need you.
I need you.
♥ "Don't follow your dreams; chase them." ♥
♥ "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." ♥
♥ "There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so." ♥
-->*My Place* *My PBH*<--
- daisy_chain
- bus conductor
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Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA*
You are such a wonderful friend and i love you dearly, but i am afraid of overburdening you if i tell you about ed stuff. I don't want to push you away. I have lost friends due to them not being able to deal with mh stuff, and i don't want that to happen with you too. I know you have always been there for me before with everything that has happened, but i don't want to keep on burdening you.
-
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Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA*
T - that really hurt. i deserved it, but it really hurt. for now i will pretent it didnt, but it went deep. ouch
PBH, Telling my parents, My place - All welcome [hugs, stars, challenges, questions are all ok
In the end, it doesnt matter where you have been or who you were,
it only matters who you want to be and where you want to end up.
[Working Towards Recovery]
*I can do all things through christ who strengthens me, Philippians 4:13*
In the end, it doesnt matter where you have been or who you were,
it only matters who you want to be and where you want to end up.
[Working Towards Recovery]
*I can do all things through christ who strengthens me, Philippians 4:13*
- ambivalent red
- growing roots
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Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA*
I think it was crappy you didnt skype with me. i know I was sarcastic but you deserved it. you act like you are 15.
There's no where to run
There's no where to hide
From what's in your mind - It's a Ghetto
-Supreme Beings Leisure
There's no where to hide
From what's in your mind - It's a Ghetto
-Supreme Beings Leisure
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Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA*
Why are you both such twats?
~Capri
xoxo
"Awake and unafraid."
My Chemical Romance
"I am haunted by humans."
The Book Thief
"Been trying hard not to get into trouble, but I've got a war in my mind."
Lana Del Rey
"It's always darkest just before the dawn. So stay awake with me. Let's prove them wrong."
Rise Against
"I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain."
Dune
xoxo
"Awake and unafraid."
My Chemical Romance
"I am haunted by humans."
The Book Thief
"Been trying hard not to get into trouble, but I've got a war in my mind."
Lana Del Rey
"It's always darkest just before the dawn. So stay awake with me. Let's prove them wrong."
Rise Against
"I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain."
Dune
- Descent
- creating your space
- Posts: 191
- Joined: Sat Feb 19, 2011 10:01 pm
- Gender: Female
- Location: United States
Re: Things Left Unsaid *LA*
I'm sorry.
This is my fault.
You're perfect.
I'm just broken.
I will never be good enough.
Don't feel bad about this.
I'm sorry.
This is my fault.
You're perfect.
I'm just broken.
I will never be good enough.
Don't feel bad about this.
I'm sorry.
♥ "Don't follow your dreams; chase them." ♥
♥ "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." ♥
♥ "There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so." ♥
-->*My Place* *My PBH*<--
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