last time i wanted to si, i didn't because.......

lovemeplease · Post by **lovemeplease** » Fri Feb 27, 2004 4:37 am

...because someone IMed me and got me interested in a bridge builder simulator..I was completely distracted =D

Yaki · Post by **Yaki** » Fri Feb 27, 2004 5:25 am

I looked at my knife and said this was you....but this isn't you now

I made a conscious choice to be happy

limestone · Post by **limestone** » Mon Mar 01, 2004 1:01 pm

listened to music, danced and then read the rest of the play I had to read for this week. Plus I really don't want to break the promise I made in December and I know I'll regret it if I do si - I do not have time to be messing about with the pratical arrangements that si brings. Getting ready in the morning takes ages already, and I don't need the extra hassle.

I've already told two people how long I've not si'ed for. I don't want to si and then feel as if I have to tell them even though they don't have to know, I'd feel bad.

don't really have anywhere to say this, so this thread is pretty cool to do it. I'd like to not si ever again in the future - I know it's far fetched and people talk about slip-ups etc etc - but I want to believe that for me, there will be no slip-ups and I want to make that a reality.

Plus, I want to feel more of how I'm feeling now, because even though I'm having a crap day today, not si'ing feels good and I never thought I'd actually be typing that here!

pink1 · Post by **pink1** » Wed Mar 03, 2004 12:09 am

I spoke to Claire, Jen, Jann and Mummy Pamela on Im. Oh and my trusty Meds too

x x x x x x

Chiara · Post by **Chiara** » Wed Mar 03, 2004 7:39 am

I was doing a presentation for my college's honor council all day, and then my friends made me go to dinner and watch American Idol with them. Then I came back to my room and wanted to SI, but I took a nap instead, and when I woke up, the urge had passed.

One day. So little and so much, all at once.

teacher2B · Post by **teacher2B** » Wed Mar 03, 2004 2:22 pm

Last time I wanted to si and didn't, I reminded myself how I didn't want to go back to the way I was when I was si-ing every day. I forced myself to be with people and I told some of my friends I was struggling.

pretty · Post by **pretty** » Wed Mar 03, 2004 6:10 pm

...because I don't deserve to hurt, I deserve to be taken care of, and I'm starting to see that.

{ Phoenix } · Post by **{ Phoenix }** » Wed Mar 03, 2004 8:22 pm

Last time I wanted to SI, I didn't because...

I am a beautiful person, and I don't deserve to hurt.

I have many people who love me and want me to be healthy.

I have made a committment to stay Cut-Free.

I have gone so long (13 weeks as of tomorrow) without cutting.

I read a few chapters in one of my favourite books, instead.

I know that I am worth the energy it takes to stay safe!

~Me~

joeiy · Post by **joeiy** » Wed Mar 03, 2004 9:05 pm

Last time I wanted to, I punched the wall (but that hurt, so I stopped because it was too much like SI), then I punched my pillow. Then I got out of bed, put some clothes on, and went for a walk in the cool night air (it was snowing earlier in the day so it was very cold!). I was looking for a drink but it was a Sunday night so no shops were open, or at least none that I could find. So I ended up getting KFC instead, and by the time I'd gotten home, eaten my KFC and warmed up again, I only really wanted to go to sleep.

limestone · Post by **limestone** » Wed Mar 03, 2004 11:04 pm

What I did instead was:

sat down and ran through the list of support people who are uncontactable atm

remembered that part of how I was feeling was lack of sleep

then I thought I'd listen to music and then cried a bit

but then I remembered I'd always been meaning to to write down one line of a song that I usually si badly to.

One line turned into the whole song and then a few more songs. It took an hour and 15 minutes and then by that time I was so hungry (hadn't eaten breakfast yet) and had a headache (volume of music) that I no longer wanted to si.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Thu Mar 04, 2004 10:09 am

........beating the crap out of a pillow helped instead

amyfairy · Post by **amyfairy** » Thu Mar 04, 2004 10:19 am

I squahed an ice cube in me hand and it bloody kills

becs · Post by **becs** » Sat Mar 06, 2004 8:07 pm

I fell asleep...

always · Post by **always** » Sun Mar 07, 2004 2:37 am

I curled up under my blanket and held a pillow tight for comfort... all the while listening to "the cure" and slowly drifted into some much needed sleep...

theatregeek · Post by **theatregeek** » Sun Mar 07, 2004 4:54 am

kinda funny actually....i was running upstairs to get my tool, and i tripped and fell down the stairs, i was completely humored and i just started alughing.... made me feel better

P!nk · Post by **P!nk** » Sun Mar 07, 2004 7:04 am

I knicked Psyches idea of tying a red ribbon around her wrist while feeling the urge and so I did so today and well, haven't yet... So it has worked so far and a good reminder of how much my friend loves me even if I don't love myself that much atm... *RaR*

freak_number12 · Post by **freak_number12** » Sun Mar 07, 2004 7:06 am

I didn't Si just a few days ago becuz I have made it so far and I didn't want to have to cover it up again it's to much work. Even more now that soccer is starting and also becuz my best friend who I would never ever lie to or break a promise with made a pack with me that niether of us would as long as we stick together. She has let me get away with a couple scarws but what I was going to do I know she wouldn't pass. I'm glad I didn't becuase lately my mom is starting to notice my scars but I guesses urges will come and go.

butterflygirl348 · Post by **butterflygirl348** » Mon Mar 08, 2004 5:31 am

because I'd given my friend the "razor" for safekeeping and she wouldn't give it back because she thought I should think about cutting for a few days before actually doing it.

Reflections · Post by **Reflections** » Mon Mar 08, 2004 6:44 am

i had made it one of my goals for the month not to, and it meant more to me at the time to attempt to stick to my goal than to SI, and when the end of the month came I didn't feel like it any more.

Ra · Post by Ra » Mon Mar 08, 2004 7:24 am

because my 3 friends who know have helped me so much, and it's not fair to them not to do anything myself. Also, that would give me something to do besides hating myself and realizing how awful I am, and event hough it would be not a nice alternative, I didn't think I deserved what I wanted to do. (I can't really put it into words, sorry) Hrm, not very positive, sorry.

bus

last time i wanted to si, i didn't because.......

This is such a cool thread :)

Last time I thought about SI I didn't becuase....

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