opening up/being loved... help?

nirvana · Post by **nirvana** » Sat Jun 19, 2004 11:37 pm

hey everyone... i guess i don't post on this board much, but if anyone has any tips, i'd appreciate them.

i have trouble letting myself be loved by other people. it's not so much a trust thing with them, more with myself. i'm not as afraid that i'll get hurt; i'm more afraid i will hurt the other person. and i couldn't take that, and don't want to put anyone through hell.

so i don't know if i'm asking for tips on letting myself be loved, or on loving other people. but either one would be nice. i probably didn't make any sense.

if anyone understood it, please reply...
thank you.
love, tara.

thisisme · Post by **thisisme** » Sun Jun 20, 2004 7:30 am

hello tara,
i kind of understand how you feel about trusting people and yourself and being loved. i often feel like i hate myself and like i dont deserve love from people but i want it soo much at the same time. i hate trusting people and telling them how i feel. i dont like being a burden and i feel like it makes me more of one and so i dont do it.i have before to a few people but they just dont understand.
i hope we talk about this
love
char

real · Post by **real** » Sun Jun 20, 2004 12:18 pm

Hey, good topic Tara. I relate very much, having difficulty loving, letting in love, & trusting. People in other threads have told me that they love me (which I feel guilty not being able to feel/allow in), that I'm lovable (which I don't believe, although they tell me that the evidence is there), etc.

Tara & Char, I really hope you get what you need to feel love & loved. I will keep an eye on this topic.

Antlion · Post by **Antlion** » Sun Jun 20, 2004 3:58 pm

It is understandable why people wouldn't want to open up. Not wanting to get hurt, hurting someone else, ect...

As a guy, my only advice is standard guy advice ie "Don't think, just act". How do you know you will get hurt unless you take a chance?

Just remember that time old quote: "It is better to have love and lost then to have never loved at all".

nirvana · Post by **nirvana** » Sun Jun 20, 2004 4:32 pm

thank you for your replies everyone.

it's nice to hear people in similar situations, insight, and advice.

if anyone else has similar situations, please share, or pm me if you don't want to post it here.

love, tara.

eyeris · Post by **eyeris** » Mon Jun 21, 2004 5:32 pm

hey,
um, I feel pretty much the same about all that love stuff. I have HUGE problems expressing emotions or taking other people's emotional gestures towards me. I do, however, have trust issues and an inability to let my guards down and be vulnerable, so I guess it's a little different. I don't know, the issue of "love" just makes me feel awkward and uncomfortable, but I really don't know why. Anyway, just my thoughts.
-e

Diamond Dog · Post by **Diamond Dog** » Fri Jun 25, 2004 2:58 am

I know how you feel.

The thing is I've notlet love and affection in when it WAS offered to me and then later when I finally felt ready to, the person who wanted to give it had moved on.

So accept love.

Jude · Post by **Jude** » Fri Jun 25, 2004 9:54 pm

I agree. Accept love. And if those people really know and love you, theyll understand the way you are without you hurting them

take a risk.

Jude x

bus

opening up/being loved... help?

opening up/being loved... help?

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