Questionnaire on *You* & Before and After forum

tools to help you assess your urges before you give in to them, and to help you understand and learn from slips after they happen. by posting here, you're saying that you are serious about exploring the feelings behind your self-harm in depth, whether you're ready to stop hurting yourself or not. to request posting access, click usergroups above and join before and after.

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Beasty
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Post by Beasty » Tue Oct 09, 2007 12:30 am

Why do you visit before and after?

I visit because sometimes I can tell that the urge is coming and I really really don't want to give in and this proves itself useful.

What do you get out of it?

I usually understand better where the urge came from, which helps me squish it.

What prompts you to think posting might be a good idea? i.e. what thought, feeling, or what happens

Usually it's desperation thing brings me here: sort of as one of the last attempts to curb the urge before giving in.

Do you find the replies helpful in understanding what happened or what you might try in the future?

I don't usually get many replies and usually I have figured it out in my own head by the end of the questions

Have you had a go at putting what you've learnt into practise?

I haven't really considered that. The things I learn are usually so situation-specific that there isn't really an available opportunity

Have you noticed a decrease in your si since interacting with this forum?

I don't think so. Well...maybe. I dont know. My posting here is so erratic that I'm not sure of its affect. Maybe I should do the "before" things more often as well as the "afters".

Would you recommend this forum and activity of using quesitons to help deal with urges to others?

Yes
"No boom today. Boom tomorrow. There’s always a boom tomorrow. What? Look, somebody’s got to have some damn perspective around here. Boom, sooner or later. BOOM!" - Susan Ivanova

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ChaosCat
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Post by ChaosCat » Fri Nov 09, 2007 11:50 pm

Why do you visit before and after?
I want to explore why I SI each time. I know the reasons I do can be different depending on what I am going through and looking to get out of it.

What do you get out of it?
I actually learn a lot about myself and have learned other people SI for some of the same reasons I do.

What prompts you to think posting might be a good idea? i.e. what thought, feeling, or what happens
I post here sometimes in hopes that maybe someone will see my answers and know they aren't alone in their reasons or in still feeling the need to SI even if they haven't for a while.

Do you find the replies helpful in understanding what happened or what you might try in the future?
I didn't get any replies when I posted here. I can usually understand why when I answer the questions and go to the coping board to see what to try in the future.

Have you had a go at putting what you've learnt into practise?
Some of it.

Have you noticed a decrease in your si since interacting with this forum? Yes. When I make myself sit and answer all the questions before I let myself do anything it usually gives me time to calm down and get to a more rational and less emotional state of mind and that usually keeps me from going through with it.

Would you recommend this forum and activity of using quesitons to help deal with urges to others?
Yes. I have actually told some of the people I know IRL to come here and look at the questions.
:1cat:
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rather than nonconformist and a liar."

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rhiannon
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Post by rhiannon » Sat Mar 22, 2008 12:50 am

Why do you visit before and after?
To get it all written out and on paper, almost like documentation- "See, it's not like I didn't try to fight it." To help sort it out and delve ever so slightly deeper into the urges before. I can't ever really do after. Either the questions scare me right now or... I just can't. I only ever do before.

What do you get out of it?

Proof I'm not crazy.
<s>... Or proof I am, but I'm not alone.</s>
Some vague system of organization for my feelings.


What prompts you to think posting might be a good idea?
i.e. what thought, feeling, or what happens
I know I have an urge, I see the "before," and I click. Because even if it doesn't help, it can't hurt.

Do you find the replies helpful in understanding what happened or what you might try in the future?
Yes. The one reply I've ever gotten was very understanding and probably helped infinitely more than the form itself. I was able to wake up without SI the next morning, read that comment, and it suddenly made struggling through the night without SI worth it.

Have you had a go at putting what you've learned into practice?
This forum is my learning and practice all in one.

Have you noticed a decrease in your si since interacting with this forum?
Probably. Yeah.

Would you recommend this forum and activity of using quesitons to help deal with urges to others?

Of course! Definitely. Sometimes, when I'm online and I've just posted, I'm tempting to IM my RL friends (who know) with the link to my post. I haven't had the guts yet...
<center>N’oublie jamais que le corps n’oublie jamais.
Never forget that the body never forgets.
0 days SI free
[since 3/29/08]
Slips: 5


I screwed up. Again.

Maiden and Chaos
The Luscious Shadow
</center>

zazie
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Post by zazie » Mon Mar 23, 2009 10:11 am

Why do you visit before and after?

Because I want to get away from the impulsive "Feel/think something - SI" mindset and towards a state of thinking it over and understanding the urges. I think it'll make it easier both for me to avoid SI and to get a better idea of what's behind it.

What do you get out of it?

Motivation to slow down and think it over. One more thing that isn't SI to do when I get an urge. A way I can attempt to satisfy any attention or validation-seeking elements of urges without SI. A way to get a better understanding of what pushes me to SI.

What prompts you to think posting might be a good idea? i.e. what thought, feeling, or what happens

Hard to say. I'm new, and I haven't successfully analyzed this yet.

Do you find the replies helpful in understanding what happened or what you might try in the future?

Yeah. Only just started using this, but it has helped me slow down and think things over. I'm hoping it'll help me get a better idea of what provokes urges, and what are effective way to resist them.

Have you had a go at putting what you've learnt into practise?

Very little, and not successfully. But I've only just started. I'm expecting more success in the future.

Have you noticed a decrease in your si since interacting with this forum?

No, but again, it's only been a day or two.

Would you recommend this forum and activity of using quesitons to help deal with urges to others?

Yeah. At least it's worth a shot.

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strmdncr
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Re: Questionnaire on *You* & Before and After forum

Post by strmdncr » Wed Apr 21, 2010 3:46 am

Why do you visit before and after?
To put something in the way of myself and giving into si urges, yet one more step I have to take.

What do you get out of it?
Sometimes nothing more than frustration. Other times a better idea of what is going on for me which allows me an opportunity to find different choices to go with other than si'ing.

What prompts you to think posting might be a good idea? i.e. what thought, feeling, or what happens
It's not so much about posting as it is about just going through the questions and taking the time to answer them. Generally I find it's rare that someone will respond to a post in before/after.

Do you find the replies helpful in understanding what happened or what you might try in the future?
Not particularly so, as I said I find it rare to receive replies to this particular place. I use it more as an introspective thing myself.

Have you had a go at putting what you've learnt into practise?
Most days, other days I'm in a "who cares" mood and then I tend not to.

Have you noticed a decrease in your si since interacting with this forum?
Hard to say if it's related to interacting with this forum or otherwise as I don't often use this forum.

Would you recommend this forum and activity of using quesitons to help deal with urges to others?
Not necessarily to help deal with urges but as a way of identifying where the urges come from and taking the time to determine if you really want to give into them then yes.
A friend is someone who believes in you even when you've ceased to believe in yourself. (unknown)

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moon raver
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Re: Questionnaire on *You* & Before and After forum

Post by moon raver » Tue Apr 01, 2014 1:24 pm

:blush: Why do you visit before and after?
:ylwstar: i visit this board so i can take a look at my feelings so i won't have to push them down until i explode in anger at my family.
:blush: What do you get out of it?
:ylwstar: just as i've said above. relief of my feelings.
:blush: What prompts you to think posting might be a good idea? i.e. what thought, feeling, or what happens
:ylwstar: when i si i want to analyze my feelings so maybe it won't happen again
:blush: Do you find the replies helpful in understanding what happened or what you might try in the future?
:ylwstar: yes, i encourage replies
:blush: Have you had a go at putting what you've learnt into practise?
:ylwstar: not yet, but i will work on it.
:blush: Have you noticed a decrease in your si since interacting with this forum?
:ylwstar: not more than usual. i go through phases of si, where i do it a lot, and then not at all.
:blush: Would you recommend this forum and activity of using quesitons to help deal with urges to others?
:ylwstar: if people are easily triggered by talking about it, then no, but otherwise, yes.

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StarChild
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Re: Questionnaire on *You* & Before and After forum

Post by StarChild » Fri Apr 03, 2015 12:18 am

Why do you visit before and after?
Because it has saved me from cutting many times.

What do you get out of it?
The questions really help me step back and examine how my urges fit into the big picture - often letting me figure out what triggered me, so I can work on that rather than just cutting and wondering why I'm cutting.

What prompts you to think posting might be a good idea? i.e. what thought, feeling, or what happens
I generally only post when I have a really hellish urge, but lately I'm coming to before & after as soon as cutting crosses my mind.

Do you find the replies helpful in understanding what happened or what you might try in the future?
Yes. Like I said, it's saved me from cutting many times.

Have you had a go at putting what you've learnt into practise?
Yes, I often am able to come up with some strategies or realize that I ought to talk to my counselor/T/Pdoc.

Have you noticed a decrease in your si since interacting with this forum?
Well, I HAVE noticed that if I post here when I have an urge, I am MUCH less likely to SI.

Would you recommend this forum and activity of using quesitons to help deal with urges to others?
Absolutely! I want to find out if I would be allowed to print these questions off to give to my counselor, so she can use them with other people.

Clean & sober since July 14, 2012.
SI free since January 29, 2016.
Cigarette free since May 12, 2017.

"i'm falling back in love with being alive."
- Kesha, "Rainbow"

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pelagic
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Re: Questionnaire on *You* & Before and After forum

Post by pelagic » Mon Apr 13, 2015 6:54 am

Why do you visit before and after?
to cope with urges, or to analyze why i acted on an urge, or to identify how a coping method helped

What do you get out of it?
idk what i "get" out of it but it really helps me

What prompts you to think posting might be a good idea? i.e. what thought, feeling, or what happens
the "before" posts really help me beat urges. also, if i act on an urge and slip up, doing a post before and doing an 'after' post really helps me feel less like a failure. i tried, and i'm willing to learn from my slip.

Do you find the replies helpful in understanding what happened or what you might try in the future?
i don't really do this for the replies, but they do help

Have you had a go at putting what you've learnt into practise?
yup

Have you noticed a decrease in your si since interacting with this forum?
oh definitely. this forum is the main one i frequent since going "si free". like, i slip up occasionally every year, but without this forum i doubt i would be doing so well

Would you recommend this forum and activity of using quesitons to help deal with urges to others?
i have recommended this forum to others, and have copied and pasted the questions in blogs and printed them out. its nice to have it written out incase there's a power outage or i don't have access to internet.

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StarChild
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Re: Questionnaire on *You* & Before and After forum

Post by StarChild » Sat Feb 20, 2016 9:16 pm

Why do you visit before and after?
I visit before and after mostly to *delay* SI - ie, I tell myself "OK, you can SI, but you have to do a before post first."

What do you get out of it?
Often I end up not SI'ing after all.

What prompts you to think posting might be a good idea? i.e. what thought, feeling, or what happens
I just start getting urges to cut, and immediately come here. It's kind of a reflex at this point.

Do you find the replies helpful in understanding what happened or what you might try in the future?
Yes, it lets me see how SI'ing does NOT help me in the long run. I hate having to make an "after" post, but that calms me down. Also, it's let me brainstorm a lot over the years.

Have you had a go at putting what you've learnt into practise?
Yes, I've found some things that help - often I think "Oh, that won't help," but I go and do it and it does end up helping.

Have you noticed a decrease in your si since interacting with this forum?
Yes, definitely.

Would you recommend this forum and activity of using quesitons to help deal with urges to others?
Absolutely. I plan to possibly present this as an option (not linking to bus of course, just giving some of the questions as an example) to people I'll work with as a peer counselor.

Clean & sober since July 14, 2012.
SI free since January 29, 2016.
Cigarette free since May 12, 2017.

"i'm falling back in love with being alive."
- Kesha, "Rainbow"

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