Just One Victory - Coping With Substance Abuse Problems

[Spidey]

Awesome!

[StarChild]

I've been sober for um...20 months. So a little over a year and a half. Each day is "just one victory." I go to 12 Step meetings regularly (about 3 or 4 a week) and I have a sponsor...though I don't talk to her enough. :/ Need to work on that. But I'm doing good with my sobriety other than that. Every day is a little victory. I just say to myself, "If I don't drink today, that'll be really cool."

loki

[Just Pomegranates]

That's fantastic you're doing so well Loki! Keep it up!

[Jamas]

I've been sober for um...20 months. So a little over a year and a half. Each day is "just one victory." I go to 12 Step meetings regularly (about 3 or 4 a week) and I have a sponsor...though I don't talk to her enough. :/ Need to work on that. But I'm doing good with my sobriety other than that. Every day is a little victory. I just say to myself, "If I don't drink today, that'll be really cool."

loki

Hey, AMAZING, Loki!!!
20 months - WOW!




One victory, one day at a time!

Take good care,

Jamas

[Spidey]

Hey folks:

I've noticed that there's not been many replies to this thread lately, so I figured I'd post here to "liven" it up a notch

Anyway: How are you doing? Where are you at with regards to your sobriety? Remember: It doesn't matter what tool you use to get sober/clean, as long as it WORKS for you. Every situation is different, every outcome is different, every programme is different. This is about YOU and not a programme.

Post your successes and your struggles. There is NO judgment here.

[Jamas]

Thanks, Spidey. Cool name, BTW!

Meh... I am still using benadryl or melatonin every night to get to sleep, even though it makes me feel sick during the day. I regularly kick the coffee habit, then pick it back up again.

Recently my partner opened up a bottle of wine and we left it in the fridge for several days, so I would have a glass of wine at night. But I don't like the fact that I can't get to sleep without added chemicals.

[childofchaos831]

I just celebrated 2 years of sobriety at the end of June. Going a little crazy, because the summer is a major trigger for me. Anniversary time. I got sober because I ended up in the hospital and had to detox cause I was there, and just kept going with it when I got out. I have been trying to get and stay sober since 2006, and have accumulated sober time before, but this is the longest I've had ever. I dunno, just posting for the heck of posting...

Coffee

[Jamas]

Hey, wow, congratulations on your two years!

[Jamas]

It's weird:

I oppose criminal drug penalties from a public safety standpoint. I'm in favor of substance abuse specialty courts from a public health perspective. (These are two positions that many advocates and public administrators consider to be legally and ideologically in contradiction.) ... From a personal preference, though, I'd love to live in a world where alcohol and other dangerous drugs just plain weren't sold, and weren't available!

I'm a bundle of contradictions, I know -- I just hate having to see alcohol in the grocery store. And if a social, community, or political event takes place in a bar, or even worse, involves the sale of alcohol as a fundraiser? Forget it!

My neighbors always asked why all my potlucks and parties were expressly dry functions, and I generally answered that as a host I wanted to have a space that was safe and welcoming for everyone present -- including myself! People don't get that it's completely reasonable and not an unfair imposition to ask them to content themselves with OJ for one night, in exchange for the privilege of my company.

[Spidey]

Jamas -

May I ask why you oppose alcohol/drugs so strongly? I don't want to come down on you, I'm just curious?

As for having your parties be completely dry functions - that is totally your call. If you don't want alcohol in your home, people should be willing to abide by that - after all, it is your house, your wishes, and your party. If they don't want to abide, they don't have to attend.

[Jamas]

Hey Spidey,

It's really more alcohol that I oppose. A childhood friend of mine killed his foster mother while high on marijuana laced with crack cocaine, and is spending what is basically his whole life in prison for a juvenile offense, so I strongly oppose allowing youths access to drugs like cocaine and amphetamines, which can make you aggressive and impair your judgment.

As for alcohol, I consider alcoholism to be a disability, and hosting dry events as basic as ensuring wheelchair access or sign language interpretation. People should not have to risk their health and well being just to attend a social, cultural, or political event, or to buy groceries. I've known and been friends with many alcoholics, and I know that inviting them to a party where alcohol is served is just putting them in danger. I have very low alcohol tolerance, so i can't drink and remain functional, and I feel uncomfortable around loud drunk people in bars.

Of course, I haven't had a party in years; I left my friends behind when I moved away.

I'm hoping to meet some people eventually, though.

[Spidey]

I agree - drugs like that on developing brains are just destructive and awful.

While I disagree that alcoholism is a disability, I completely understand your reasoning.

[Jamas]

Thanks, Spidey.

[steady hands]

any tips for sober living in a not sober place?

I am going to school away from home right now, and there are seriously drugs everywhere, and I'm trying to kind of get away from that. (I don't want to seriously get back into using.)


gretchen.

Hi Gretchen,

I hope you're in a better place now -- I'm sorry this reply comes a year late! I tried to stay away from drugs and alcohol in school, and I did it by changing my living situation as quickly as I could -- moved into a co-op house with like-minded people who had made a commitment to keeping away from drugs and alcohol. That helped a lot.

Good luck!

Thanks for the reply.
The situation ended up being really detrimental to my sobriety at first. I used pretty much constantly, and when I wasn't using, the people around me were. Near the end of the semester I got extremely sick, and was able to see how much I was really using and that I had gotten sick because of it. I realized a lot of my behaviors were really self-destructive and I cut back quite a bit and tried to remove myself from situations where I would be tempted to use.

I have been struggling a little bit recently. I started drinking and getting high again. It hasn't been constant, but I know it's still self-destructive. I've been feeling very anxious and a little depressed, and have been using to cope in social situations I normally wouldn't be using in. I have also been having si urges, which hasn't happened in a while. I feel like I have been using because it's "less dangerous" for me to drink and/or get high just with friends than it is to relapse on self harm. Does anybody else ever feel like this?

g

[Jamas]

I've been down that path, G. It sounds like you have great insight into your situation.

I wish you all the best,

Jamas

[steady hands]

thank you, jamas.

[childofchaos831]

So, I have been trying to decide the best place for this post/question.

May trig for SI and also Drugs, so be aware...




So, this is where I am... really, really want to drink/use. I mean like I had some alcohol in my hands at the store, and only put it back, because I decided to go to the liquor store. On the way to that store, I opted to wait til tomorrow because I see my pdoc tomorrow. I have been having urges to drink use for a while now, pretty much since before I got two years, and I'm almost at 2 1/2 now (will be 12/27). My pdoc said last time that she may be willing to raise the dose of naltrexone that I am on, if I need it. I take naltrexone to reduce/handle urges/cravings.

The other part of this, is that I am not actively trying to stop SI'ing, but I do consider the possible consequences of doing it versus not doing it, and make a decision with all the facts. Right now, my brain is trying to argue that SI will have the same effect as drinking, and is less damaging in the long term (not not damaging at all, I mean like liver problems, cirrhosis and for me alcohol gives me leukocytosis), and is not something that I am actively trying to abstain from.

I don't want to excuse SI in this instance, but is it even possible for SI to be the lesser of two evils in this case?

I am so confused right now, and I hope that I made sense.

Coffee

[mande]

Hi Coffee,

It's difficult to deal with SI urges while staying sober. Good for you for using a version of the "I won't get this here, but I'll get it there. I won't get it there, but I'll wait until tomorrow." It might be something you can apply to SI, which I do frequently. "I won't SI today, but I can tomorrow if I still feel this need." And then I repeat that tomorrow. It's weird how it works.

I don't think there's a lesser of two evils here. You're almost comparing apples and oranges. Yes, both are tasty fruit, but they aren't the same. SI or using will both have negative affects. Maybe make a pros/cons list and bring it to your pdoc? Then you can explore that a bit more in a safe environment.

[childofchaos831]

Well the pdoc had to cancel. Apparently she is sick. Couldn't get in til January. Don't know if I'll make it that long. And honestly right now I don't care. If it keeps me alive it works at this point. When the drinking and si urges get this bad I start feeling su. I don't even know anything anymore.

[Spidey]

How is everyone doing?

I'm actually racking up a few sober days right now (straaaange!) and it's been real nice.