Before (this is helping!)

[half/hearted]

how will this situation or feeling change if i hurt myself?
It will numb the pain. My chest feels like it's being crushed.

what will hurting myself bring to the situation? what will it take away from the situation?
Control. It will both bring it and take it away.

how do i want to feel about this in the long run? is hurting myself likely to get me closer to or farther from feeling that way?
I want to feel rightly guilty about what I did, but I also don't want to have hurt myself. I have about six months clean and I don't want to screw that up.

if hurting myself seems like my best option right now, how long will the relief it brings last? what will i do then?
An hour, tops. After that I'll feel even worse, and I don't know what I'll do.

what is something i could do now instead of hurting myself? how will it change the situation i'm in? how long will that change last, and what will i do then?
I could watch a movie. It will distract me and hopefully get this chest-crushing feeling to go away.

how will i feel tomorrow if i hurt myself? how will i feel tomorrow if i do the other thing i came up with?
If I hurt myself, I will hate myself even more tomorrow (if that's even possible). If I just watch a movie and then go to bed, I will feel proud of myself for not SI'ing (or attempting SU).

what do i really want to do right now? how can i best honor the self-protective instinct that has me wanting to self-injure right now?
I can be proactive instead of passive. Being passive is what got me here in the first place. If I'm proactive, I can get control of the situation and my depression won't be in control anymore.

Why do I feel I need to hurt myself? What has brought me to this point?
I haven't been a responsible student this semester. This is the breaking point. I am really going to change because this hurts so bad I can't bear the thought of ever feeling like this again.

Have I been here before? What did I do to deal with it? How did I feel then?
Not really. I've always been pretty responsible. It's just that things have really gone to shit this semester. I don't know why. I think it's because I fell behind in the beginning of the semester and just never really felt it was worth trying to catch up, because I felt like I was gonna fail anyway.

What I have done to ease this discomfort so far? What else can I do that won't hurt me?
I've posted here. That helped. I rephrased what happened to my mom, and I'm trying to reframe it in my mind to fit what I said to her.

How do I feel right now?
Horrible. I feel like I'm dying. I feel like something with claws is squeezing my heart. I feel like I'm having a heart attack, but it goes on and on.

How will I feel when I am hurting myself?
Numb.

How will I feel after hurting myself? How will I feel tomorrow morning?
Horrible again. I'll be kicking myself mentally and emotionally and, honestly, probably hating myself even more then.

Can I avoid this stressor, or deal with it better in the future?
Hell yes. I can be more proactive, less passive, and feel that it is always worth it to try.

Do I need to hurt myself?
...No. I hate to say it, but no.

And I'm not going to. I'm going to go watch a movie, and it won't make everything better, but it will hopefully at least get my mind off things.

[NobodyToYou]

First, I am glad this is helping. It sounds like you have a pretty good idea of other options and why you don't want to SI, which is good.

I don't know the situation (and don't need to know... it is entirely up to you what you want to share or don't want to) but I wondered what the main feelings are that are overwhelming you right now? It sounds like there might be some anxiety in there (I am usually feeling anxious when I feel like I can't breathe) and maybe some anger with yourself?

I am asking because sometimes I was able to get past the crisis better if I used coping ideas that were kinda targeted to what I was feeling. Eventually the feelings will change anyway, and distraction might be all you need at this point. But if anxiety is something you are feeling, then choosing a scary movie might be a mistake where a silly movie might be better. Or if you are feeling sad but can't express it, sometimes a sad, dramatic type movie worked better for me... I can sometimes cry about a movie when I can't cry about my own life. When I was angry, I often coped better if I did something active and physical.

I hope you are doing better now and that the evening is getting easier.