Things Left Unsaid *LA*

strider 151 · Post by **strider 151** » Sat Mar 26, 2011 5:27 pm

seeing you today braught all my old feelings back. thanks. not helpful.

Eva · Post by **Eva** » Sat Mar 26, 2011 10:59 pm

Please, come back

capricorn · Post by **capricorn** » Sat Mar 26, 2011 11:27 pm

Meh, I guess I'm not allowed friends then.

I spose I know the way things are ...

strider 151 · Post by **strider 151** » Sun Mar 27, 2011 1:54 pm

you fustrate me. can't you see whats been done for you? the sacrifices that have been made? your free!! your standing in prison when the door is so wide open!! i know things are hard, but just walk into what god has for you, and stop spinning the pity stories and standing like a vegatable in church. its a celebration because he died for you, hes done all the work, all for you, and you dont even appreciate it. its difficult to watch, but i have no choice. please, open your eyes.

stripysocks4christ · Post by **stripysocks4christ** » Sun Mar 27, 2011 2:06 pm

i hate how none of you can ever understand how hard it is for me. to stand there while you all sing and praise god. when i feel nothing. how hard it is for me to just make it through each service. cos unlike you guys, im not perfect. not at all. i believe in god, sure, but there is so much more you wouldnt understand. i know you think im being stupid and childish or whatever, and maybe i am. but i have my reasons. and before you ask - im NOT going to share them with you.

and you - how did we get here? things were so good now look at us. i dont like being in a friendship revolves around jealousy and fighting. im not sure how much more i can take...

Beasty · Post by **Beasty** » Mon Mar 28, 2011 7:09 am

*SI, Sex*

You drive me batshit crazy. I dreamed of kissing you last night, as I have done several times before. It drives me mad, knowing the sensation in my mind, yet never knowing it truly. I feel like a teenager again, driven by hormones. Yet, here I am, gone mad by the thought of you. I want your kisses, your hands, your breast and heartbeat. Your love. It's so ridiculous and embarrasses me immensely. I can only say it here.
Strangely, oh so strangely, it makes me want to walk through the walkways covered by a thousand cuts. Bleeding and bleeding until this madness is gone from me. An angel of destructive lunacy. I never would, never could, but it seems fitting.

Licentia Poetica · Post by **Licentia Poetica** » Mon Mar 28, 2011 8:03 am

Oy, BITCH

You don't go through my bag
You don't go through my stuff
You don't ransack my room while I'm at work
You don't try to turn my family against me
and
You don't rely on me for money

GET IT THROUGH YOUR FUCKING HEAD.

strider 151 · Post by **strider 151** » Mon Mar 28, 2011 10:01 pm

this doesnt seem like a good idea, but i just cant help it

i dont wanna hurt anyone

Descent · Post by **Descent** » Mon Mar 28, 2011 10:24 pm

Today was so much better than I ever could have hoped.
I've never felt this way. You make my life amazing.

My Hazey Clarity · Post by **My Hazey Clarity** » Wed Mar 30, 2011 2:25 am

Yes my life will be better after you pass away. It will allow me a way to finally let all it go with off with you. I dont like the pain i always feel even thinking about you and the love you denied your own child. Its just not enough to be out of my life, i really need you gone for good. So i can finally be free.

Kaleb · Post by **Kaleb** » Wed Mar 30, 2011 3:40 pm

Thinking back - I now realise what a bad girlfriend I was .....
I was just so insecure and so shy and so worried about the repercussions of what would happen if I did something.
That I guess got too much ....
I wish I could go back to that time and be the person I am now ..... cause I don't take any crap from anyone anymore .... I tell them to go to hell and leave me alone, and I could have stood up for us how I should have, could have told all the haters where to go without worrying and could have been a decent girlfriend.

But everything happens for a reason - lives that crossed separate and sometimes they cross over again and sometimes they stay apart, sometimes thats for the best.

I just wish I could time travel, I was happy then. I wish we could still have those convos where we used fridges and dinosaurs as code words ... cause they were the best - or those long talks just sat together sharing our deepest secrets and our biggest hopes and dreams, or where we could sit in class and scare the pants off the teacher cause we could finish eachothers sentences, even regarding work - or with the 'you go' 'no its okay you go' thing in Mr B's class about who would answer first and the look on their faces.

times that even when I think about them now .... I smile. I wish I could go back and be the person I am now.

Stawberry_Lollipops · Post by **Stawberry_Lollipops** » Wed Mar 30, 2011 5:48 pm

I am so disappointed in you. I couldn't even begin to describe how disappointed I am.
I really thought that maybe you'd be okay with it. Just maybe you could be open-minded and
see it for what it is. See past all the prejudices and just see me as a girl in love.
I know now that you would never be able to accept that part of me so there is no point in
even telling you. Why should I put myself through that grief?

But I just thought...maybe you'd be okay with it and I'd be able to share with you, this
wonderful relationship, this wonderful love, this wonderful person I have in my life. I thought
maybe I'd actually be able to sit with you and tell you all about my first true love and how
happy they make me. How content I feel in her arms. You always said, you wanted me to
share that with you and I always thought we would. It saddens me greatly that we'll
never get that opportunity to be honest and open. That you'll never get to be happy for
me. That I'll have to keep on hiding and keeping everything a secret. I really had hope that
you wouldn't be judgemental but I realise now I was living in a fantasy world. I was naive to
ever think you could accept me as a bisexual woman. I'm so sorry you'll never get to know
that part of me or experience this part of my life.

I am so sorry mum. But this is who I am and I can't change that. It's your loss in the end.

strider 151 · Post by **strider 151** » Thu Mar 31, 2011 7:29 pm

this isnt worth the pain and hurt its gonna cause everyone. im not worth it, your not worth it. why are we in this? you dont even like me, you like A. and yet you have power over me, i cant help it. please, break this spell.

Descent · Post by **Descent** » Thu Mar 31, 2011 10:25 pm

I'm terrified that this won't last.
I need you.

Jamas · Post by **Jamas** » Fri Apr 01, 2011 3:59 am

I need sex in my life. I've been thinking about other people, in part because I don't have that with you.

daisy_chain · Post by **daisy_chain** » Fri Apr 01, 2011 7:42 pm

You are such a wonderful friend and i love you dearly, but i am afraid of overburdening you if i tell you about ed stuff. I don't want to push you away. I have lost friends due to them not being able to deal with mh stuff, and i don't want that to happen with you too. I know you have always been there for me before with everything that has happened, but i don't want to keep on burdening you.

strider 151 · Post by **strider 151** » Sat Apr 02, 2011 1:26 am

T - that really hurt. i deserved it, but it really hurt. for now i will pretent it didnt, but it went deep. ouch

ambivalent red · Post by **ambivalent red** » Sat Apr 02, 2011 2:46 am

I think it was crappy you didnt skype with me. i know I was sarcastic but you deserved it. you act like you are 15.

capricorn · Post by **capricorn** » Sat Apr 02, 2011 6:04 pm

Why are you both such twats?

Descent · Post by **Descent** » Sat Apr 02, 2011 8:38 pm

I'm sorry.
This is my fault.
You're perfect.
I'm just broken.
I will never be good enough.
Don't feel bad about this.
I'm sorry.

bus

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