Things Left Unsaid *LA*

[Neviah]

i'd marry you today if you asked

[guest567]

I am pissed off with you hence why I am not replying to your texts. Why would you get with him in the same room as I was trying to sleep for the entire time I had to sleep last night? You must have known I wasn't asleep as soon as you switched the light off and you kept waking me as soon as I got to sleep when you rolled into something in the room or the sofa I was sleeping in or talked in your normal volume. He only lived down the street - why did you not go there? Plus you were both blocking the door so I couldn't have gone out of the room to sleep on our friend's floor even if I wanted to as I could hardly interrupt you. Then he spent the morning after I was very sleep deprived boasting about how great he is - I had already heard it the night before and don't think I need to hear it over and over again. Yes I am being bitchy, but I am very sleep deprived and needed to be energetic for my seminar this morning and energetic I was not.

[capricorn]

WHY can't you UNDERSTAND what I am TRYING to SAY?

[xXelmoscaresmeXx]

I'm not fucking BULIMIC!
I do NOT BINGE!
Fuck you.
Fuck you.
Purging does not equal bulimia!
STOP GOING THROUGH MY SHIT! It's MINE! I gave you my tools, and the band-aids and the rest of the stuff goddammit!
FUCK OFF! I'm 14, being secretive is fucking NORMAL! Wanting privacy is fucking NORMAL!

[Neviah]

if this is true, i'll never forgive you

[capricorn]

Oh God, I miss you both so much.
N, just get in touch with me, please, I miss you, I need you. I can't stand feeling like my right arm has been cut off and that you don't care. I just wanna hear your voice so bad.
And J ... Fucking hell, man, I have so much to tell you. So many times I've needed you. I'm just. Gah, fuck my back, fuck the work, I hate not being able to get online at your times ... it is so unnatural not to talk to you. I love you, I miss you so much.

[Annybelly]

WTH dad. I was talking to F. I was being honest, and I took the step, and then you barge in. I was nearly able to get some adivce I fuckind NEED. Cheers. Thanks a lot. Insensitive bastard.

[Neviah]

Ive been checking the other forum you joined several times a day, logging onto chat to see if anyone has heard from you.. please be ok.....please be ok... i need you to be ok.. need our chats, need your words.. your mobile number doesnt work.. can't get in touch with your family because all i have for them is your surname. The only person I can contact is dependant on her logging in.. i feel like im smacking my head against a wall trying to find you.. there's so many things i wish i had said to you last time we spoke, so many things I want to talk about now.. i can't believe its you on that site i found. I need it not to be you..

[Stawberry_Lollipops]

I don't blame you. I don't hate you. But gawd, I sure as hell resent you. Just so fucking much. How can you not see? How can you think it's just me being ungrateful, lazy, inconsiderate? Don't you think I want to help, to do these things for you? It's fucking bad enough I beat myself up about it over and over again. Why can't you understand that I can't? I physically can not do all these things you ask of me otherwise I would do it wouldn't I?! I wish I had a broken leg or arm or some physically obvious disability instead of it all being in my head, then maybe you would understand better. I don't know how to make you understand. I am so lost and just so desperately want you to understand.

[Eva]

Dear X

I'm not even sure if I'm ready to write all this to you, but I feel like I have to do something.

This weekend has been really bad. I've felt empty, stupid and pathetic. I've cried because of you and because of this situation we're in. I said to myself that it wouldn't happen again, but it did. But it can't happen again..it just can't. I have a choice and I know what's right, but I don't listen to my reason. I just keep going on. But I can't do that anymore. It has to stop now. It hurts too much.

I'm letting you go and this time I mean it. Or deep down inside I don't. I don't want it to stop..I don't want to give up, but I feel like I have to. Because it won't go as I want it to. I hate myself for hurting myself.

I feel dead inside. I can't recognize myself anymore. I have been happy, but now I'm not. And it's because of this.

So goodbye..I will have to forget my feelings. There's nothing else I can do.

[Butterfly.]

For crying out loud! Not a secretive household? Bull!!! We've kept some of the biggest possible secrets over the years. So don't try telling me that we don't keep secrets. And just get over the fact I don't need to tell you everything. You don't need to know where I am. I'm good, you know I won't do anything stupid. I just need away from all of you. That's why I keep going out. I don't want to be under this roof, I don't want to be near any of you. I just want space. Can't you just get that?

[Neviah]

it's confirmed, but i dont want to lose hope for you.. i don't want to admit it.. i don't want it to be true, i want it to be a sick joke

[Stawberry_Lollipops]

FFS! What part of 'I DO NOT WANT TO TALK TO YOU' do you not understand???

[capricorn]

Please can't you understand, it's not as simple as me just trying. It's not just a train. I am fighting against everything in me that is screaming at me not to, that is telling me to run and hide, it is like there is a barrier to me, a wall that comes down in my head and I can't. I just CAN'T.

If I could cut this out of me I would. If I knew a way to stop it I would. There is nothing that makes me despise myself and be ashamed of myself more. I love you deeply and that is the truth of it, but some things make me feel physically ill.

Please, I am so understanding of everything of yours, just ... don't make me feel worse about this than I already do.

[Neviah]

whenever anything happens i come to you..so who do i go to now?

[Birdie]

If you dare lay a finger on her...I swear to god. She DOES NOT deserve this. You are making our lives a living fucking hell. What the fuck is wrong with you?! WAKE UP!
You are the most heartless, inconsiderate, selfish bastard i've ever known.
You are un-fucking-believable.
FUCK. YOU.

[strider 151]

i would do anything for your attention, even if i have to take drastic measures. sometimes i just wish i had the guts to tell u what i really think, but i know that if i did then u would call a mental institute.


i really need help

[Licentia Poetica]

I'm listening, everyone. Your words are not unheard

[mande]

I wish I felt more about what you did. But all I feel is numb because I'm just so sick of this.

I wonder if you felt this way about me when I was a teenager.

[Birdie]

Thanks, Licentia

-You're just using me. I'm just a pawn in your pathetic game. What I don't know is if i'm really your best friend. Do you really give a shit? Do you really love me?

-Just...no. You piss me off. We're completely different people. I've accepted it, why can't you?

-Why do I feel the desperate need to get your attention? I am a fucking sick person. But I just want you to care about me.