Things Left Unsaid *LA*

[Annybelly]

Fuck off, you arrogant old twat. Tell T yourself, imma not about to be your arrogant little messenger. You can shove your advice where the sun dont shine.. your bellybutton.

[strider 151]

i just want to be noticed. just notice me please. i'm alive. i have breath in me. i will do anything to have ur attention, oh please

[mande]

I hate the way you speak. I avoid reading your statuses because of that.

[Isis]

knowing what i've could have but i ruined is killing me. i want to kiss you, i want to hold you and hug you

[Birdie]

I couldn't do it. I'm weak and pathetic and needy and I NEED HELP. I can't do it alone. It's getting increasingly difficult to push away the bad thoughts and the depression and all the other shit. I'm still sick, and I hate to admit defeat, but I have to if I want to avoid another nervous breakdown. My mind is just fucked...somebody tell me it's not my fault. Maybe i'll believe it.

[volta]

hey S,
i miss you like freaking crazy.
i know i told you some of this already, so it really doesn't count as something "unsaid."
but i really want you to come home.
i know you can't. i know you're an RA at school so you have to stay there and take care of your residents.
but i'm like your little sister. whenever i call or text you, or talk about you to anyone, i always refer to you as my brother. and right now i'm being selfish and kinda whiney and i really really want you to hold me.
i miss J like this all the time. but tonight it's you.
i remember this summer before school started, when we were at your friend's house after the beach party. i told you i didn't want to go home. you said, "i know you don't." and that's all you said. but you held me tight in your arms, and i felt safe. and cared for. and cared about. loved.
it's so hard being around these boys constantly. i mean, i do consider JJ and V good friends. but they're not you. and i'm constantly having to tell myself not to treat them like they are you. we're not to that stage yet, and i honestly don't know if i will get there with them. but you, i know that you can bring me out of the maze of my mind. you don't have a problem with holding my hand when my hands start to shake, or letting me rest my head on your shoulder.
as i said before, right now i'm being selfish. i want you here so i can talk to you. so i can talk to someone and be honest and real and me. the me i'm used to. and i want you here to hold my hand, and hug me, and not pull away.
i miss you, big brother.
i miss you so much.
it hurt a lot to hear that you don't know when you're coming home. i could tell in your voice that you were sad about it, too. i'm sorry.
i just wish we both weren't so alone right now.

love,
b

[Isis]

i don't know if you really mean it or not, but i was really happy today when you said you just want to spend some time and laugh with me

[strider 151]

ok, so he was nice, but hes taken and hes bad and he is 100% off limits. but if he was single and approached me, maybe.......oh please, im a fool for attention, even in the worst possible forms. i know if i follow this route i will end up somewere i really dont wanna be, hurting a load of people, and destroying my chances of a pure marriage.

[Nothingness]

To my mother:
Why did you ask me if you should stay with him?
Why did you left him do that to you?
I was just a ----ing boy, I couldn't protect you... I had to watch you suffer but it was YOUR CHOICE! I wanted us both out! I needed to save BOTH OF US!
And now, I've lived all my life next to a monster I was conditioned to love, and you keep denying that there is a problem. Mind your own business? How the ---- can you say that?
We need to address this and I know you're scared and insecure but what you fail to realize is that I'm not attacking you, I'm asking you for help because I've grown up scared and insecure and hateful like no other person, but I've had to fight it. I've had to block my feelings, I've had to eat them and I want to die, to stop existing. And I can't believe I can be saved from myself and I don't believe I deserve anything good... I don't see clear any more... I need so much help, but we all do and I'm scared to leave you because I can see how paralyzed you are and I don't understand it.

To the part of my step father that's still an alcoholic:
You hurt me by hurting my mother, you drunk beast. You should ----ing die.

To anyone at military high school:
You don't matter anymore.

To my real father:
Soooo, what's up?

[Stefani140]

That's really rich, you get pissed at me when your the one who just spent 10 minutes trying to make me feel like an idiot. Oh wait I forgot, you were "kidding" so that makes being a jackass perfectly alright. I really hate the person I get to talk to when your brother's around, how about you just spare us both and avoid me when he's there.

[strider 151]

M im so sick of this, sort youself out!!!!!!! f sake


you say ur just friends, look how u act with him, im starting to really dislike you

sorry, but i cant hide how i feel anymore & im not the only one.

[Annybelly]

I hate you facebook. I spent ages organising those photos, when you just decide to close. For the record, i hate this damn desktop as well, and Im not too chuffed with the computer guy who was apparently sorting it out WEEKS AGO.
Oh, and J? Shut up. Now. Noone wants you in this house.

*eugh* how the hell do i now do homework with that much noise?

[Isis]

i'm not going to ask my friend to come with us.i don't know why i mentioned it anyway.i want to be alone with you

[calypso]

Just fuck off. Have some fucking consideration.

[Brit]

Just when I think I can't cry another tear, here comes a whole new stream of tears.
I just can't stop thinking about you.

[strider 151]

no i dont want to hug u, sort yourself out because ur not worth it

[Stefani140]

Sometimes I wonder how much longer I can deal with all this. I find myself annoyed with you more than happy the past week.

[DuchessN]

If your girlfriend is so amazing why is it ME that you text in the early morning hours? Why is it ME you turn to when you're having a problem? You're my friend, and I love you more than you will ever know. . . so why is it that SHE gets the best of you and I am left to tend your bruised and wounded soul? If she is as amazing as you say, then why is it that you don't wake her up and tell her your problems? Why is it that you don't realize? I'M the one who knows you inside and out. I'M the one who loves and accepts every part of who you are, past, present and future. I'M the one who tells you what you NEED to hear, I'M the one who never plays stupid head games with you. I'M the one who wants happiness for you.

YOU are the one missing out on a good thing. . .

[strider 151]

HELLO??????

i'm here


im alive!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111


i live in this house 2, just cos u have them doesnt mean u have to ignore me. dont u get it???? i need you to give me attention, i need equal attention as them, because if not the voices that lie in my head get stronger and drown god out, and then all the bad stuff comes back and i cant fight it anymore, i could never fight it. but your not helping. dont u understand?


every. single. second. you. spend. with them. HURTS.


but u cant see it, so stay ignorant because if u knew what was in my head u would die

[Stefani140]

Why do you insist on doing this to me over and over and over again! You tell me to tell you everything, and then I do and you go completely quiet on me for almost 5 minutes?! And then just laugh and say you needed a drink. Real brilliant timing there genius. I really don't know why I keep expecting that the next time will be different, the next time you'll actually act like a mature adult and not a whiny teenager who thinks I'm blaming him for everything. I'll just keep my mouth shut from now on.