Before

tools to help you assess your urges before you give in to them, and to help you understand and learn from slips after they happen. by posting here, you're saying that you are serious about exploring the feelings behind your self-harm in depth, whether you're ready to stop hurting yourself or not. to request posting access, click usergroups above and join before and after.

Moderator: treasure

Post Reply
zaphriel
meeting the neighbors
meeting the neighbors
Posts: 480
Joined: Mon Feb 09, 2009 4:57 pm

Before

Post by zaphriel » Wed Jun 23, 2010 8:04 pm

how will this situation or feeling change if i hurt myself?
The situation won't change at all but I would relieve some of the stress.
what will hurting myself bring to the situation? what will it take away from the situation?
It will bring mainly negative problems between me and my partner. It will remove some of the stress I am feeling but add different stress.
how do i want to feel about this in the long run? is hurting myself likely to get me closer to or farther from feeling that way?
I want to feel like I have achieved things, and hurting myself probably won't further that.
if hurting myself seems like my best option right now, how long will the relief it brings last? what will i do then?
A few hours maybe.
what is something i could do now instead of hurting myself? how will it change the situation i'm in? how long will that change last, and what will i do then?
I could put it off like I have been doing for days, but I don't seem to be getting anywhere with it.
how will i feel tomorrow if i hurt myself? how will i feel tomorrow if i do the other thing i came up with?
I'll feel stupid and probably ashamed.
what do i really want to do right now? how can i best honor the self-protective instinct that has me wanting to self-injure right now?
I could talk about it, but my partner won't listen as she's too self absorbed at the minute. I don't know who else I could talk to.


Why do I feel I need to hurt myself? What has brought me to this point?
Everything just feels so overwhelming at the minute, the results I've waited for all academic year come out tomorrow and I can't deal with the thought of failing my own expectations.
Have I been here before? What did I do to deal with it? How did I feel then?
I dealt with it by SI - ing and it relieved the stress for a while, but I was in an environment where I was 'allowed' to SI with little consequence.
What I have done to ease this discomfort so far? What else can I do that won't hurt me?
I have snuck a couple of cigarettes behind my partner's back - just a different self destructive behaviour. I don't know what I can do. I'm running out of options.
How do I feel right now?
Lonely.
How will I feel when I am hurting myself?
Numb, clear headed, less stressed.
How will I feel after hurting myself? How will I feel tomorrow morning?
I'll be less stressed if I can do it without my partner knowing, tomorrow morning is results day, so who knows?
Can I avoid this stressor, or deal with it better in the future?
I can't avoid it for the next two years, I can probably deal with it better, but I don't know how.
Do I need to hurt myself?
I feel like I do, yes.

User avatar
teacher2B
building community
building community
Posts: 597
Joined: Tue Aug 12, 2003 4:28 am
Gender: female
Location: New Hampshire (USA) Age: 37
Contact:

Re: Before

Post by teacher2B » Mon Jun 28, 2010 1:04 am

The situation won't change at all but I would relieve some of the stress.
In the long run, won't the stress still be there?
how do i want to feel about this in the long run? is hurting myself likely to get me closer to or
I could put it off like I have been doing for days, but I don't seem to be getting anywhere with it.
What could you do instead of just putting it off? What coping strategies could you use?
Everything just feels so overwhelming at the minute, the results I've waited for all academic year come out tomorrow and I can't deal with the thought of failing my own expectations.
You won't know until tomorrow. Can you just wait and see rather than pre-emptively SI-ing becuase you *might* have done poorly?


User avatar
Glockenspiel
forum moderator emeritus
forum moderator emeritus
Posts: 28941
Joined: Wed Oct 03, 2007 5:13 pm

Re: Before

Post by Glockenspiel » Tue Jul 06, 2010 3:33 am

Congrats on not SI-ing.
I always enjoy myself, even when I'm crying -- Jen Johnson

My place

Post Reply

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 16 guests