Strike Back of Secrets! [The Secrets Thread - Read 1st Post]

tips on how to cope: dealing with your feelings, dealing with the consequences of self-harm in your life. share your ideas and maybe pick up some new skills, too. you don't have to want to stop to learn something new here.

Moderators: Spidey, noldo

Locked
User avatar
Ruby Tuesday
just plain inspiring
just plain inspiring
Posts: 7103
Joined: Fri Nov 12, 2004 10:36 am
Location: on the floor of a library

Post by Ruby Tuesday » Sun Nov 09, 2008 11:02 am

I'm too scared to contact you to see how you are, because I think you'll tell me about her. I suspect she's living with him or that they're in engaged, and the suspicion is bad enough ... but hearing that it's true? I don't want to know. I know that makes me a bad friend to you, but at the same time, you're not exactly beating down my door to talk either.
"I saw spiders where there were no spiders" - patti smith
"'My hands', she said, 'I've left them somewhere and now I can't find them.' She was holding her hands in the air, helplessly, as if she couldn't move them.
'They're right there', I said, 'On the end of your arms'
'No, no', she said impatiently, 'Not those , those are no good anymore. My other hands, the ones I had before, the ones I could touch things with.'" - margaret atwood


place

User avatar
KLove24
just plain inspiring
just plain inspiring
Posts: 7363
Joined: Thu Jul 03, 2008 3:49 am
Location: somewhere, yet nowhere

Post by KLove24 » Sun Nov 09, 2008 9:24 pm

I just want to be able to call you and see what you are up too. I am scared to do that though. I am scared you hate me or that you are happy and want nothing to do with me.
<center>

Image


<A HREF="http://buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php? ... A>*replies welcome

Image
</center>

User avatar
mephistopheles
cow control
cow control
Posts: 24355
Joined: Thu May 26, 2005 4:40 pm
Location: London

Post by mephistopheles » Mon Nov 10, 2008 2:37 pm

It's back. It wins. I give up. Whatever.
“Where you used to be, there is a hole in the world, which I find myself constantly walking around in the daytime, and falling in at night. I miss you like hell.”

User avatar
vampirelover
spiffy maximus
spiffy maximus
Posts: 4149
Joined: Tue Apr 17, 2007 8:45 pm
Gender: F
Location: London ish(England), age : 21

Post by vampirelover » Mon Nov 10, 2008 3:50 pm

Although i get annoyed at people who selfharm for attention ,I have done it more then once
longest with no slips - 2 years , 6 months
time since last slip : 2 days

User avatar
vampirelover
spiffy maximus
spiffy maximus
Posts: 4149
Joined: Tue Apr 17, 2007 8:45 pm
Gender: F
Location: London ish(England), age : 21

Post by vampirelover » Mon Nov 10, 2008 3:51 pm

Im afraid if i tell my dad the truth he wont love me and his fake love is keeping me alive
longest with no slips - 2 years , 6 months
time since last slip : 2 days

User avatar
ambivalent red
growing roots
growing roots
Posts: 768
Joined: Wed Aug 20, 2008 7:58 pm
Location: buried deep inside of me

Post by ambivalent red » Mon Nov 10, 2008 4:13 pm

I'm glad. I could have made a huge mistake. I'm happy it did not work out.
There's no where to run
There's no where to hide
From what's in your mind - It's a Ghetto
-Supreme Beings Leisure

User avatar
kgraff
meeting the neighbors
meeting the neighbors
Posts: 385
Joined: Tue Sep 23, 2008 10:02 pm
Location: Maine

Post by kgraff » Mon Nov 10, 2008 10:18 pm

im glad my suicide attempt failed because i want to live. but im sad because im still in pain and dont know what to do
PM box wide open
and I LOVE HUGS!!!!

My PLace~~~~
http://buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php?t=128510

My writings and stuff~~~
http://buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php?t=129393

User avatar
caged bird
board admin emeritus
board admin emeritus
Posts: 22909
Joined: Mon Jul 15, 2002 2:51 pm
Location: UK Age 24
Contact:

Post by caged bird » Tue Nov 11, 2008 1:37 pm

it's my fault, i'm sorry. i've been waiting to hit rock bottom for so long that i dont think i realised that i've probably been here a long long time
visit my website
My Place

Being almost devastated is horrible because it lingers. But total devastation brings a kind of peace. It lets you give up.
Thieves and Kings: Volume Two by Mark Oakly

The line between normal and crazy seemed impossibly thin. A person would have to be an expert tightrope walker in order not to fall.
Running with scissors - Augusten Burroughs

User avatar
red umbrellas
beyond inspiring
beyond inspiring
Posts: 8175
Joined: Mon Mar 01, 2004 8:50 am
Location: Sydney

Post by red umbrellas » Wed Nov 12, 2008 5:54 am

I resent it. And I could never ever tell you and I won't. But in some ways, no matter how much I get angry or hurt, you mean the world to me. Everything flips backwards for me...it's ridiculous and foolish and it hurts.
But you do all the same
It's all life and fire and lunacy
And excuses and excuses and excuses

Hold On To Yourself - Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds

"We paint a picture of a scenario - and then we become afraid of it" - Andrea Fella

User avatar
(*Haven*)
cow control
cow control
Posts: 24497
Joined: Thu May 27, 2004 12:14 am
Location: The traffic jam of life

Post by (*Haven*) » Wed Nov 12, 2008 7:28 am

I will push those feelings away. I don't want to have them.
:ylwstar: My Place :ylwstar: Visitors are welcome. New First Post 12/16/08
Forever Satan of RW
Married to Reine, nicki, han & klove
WDS, snowangel, kicks, figment & Chey (plus kitties) belong to me!
Stef is my twin
Klove's partner....(in crime! Get your mind outta the gutter already!)

:.*.:NO HUGS:.*.:

User avatar
Callisto
postmaster
postmaster
Posts: 37888
Joined: Sun May 04, 2003 3:22 pm

Post by Callisto » Wed Nov 12, 2008 1:15 pm

Before anyone lynches on me, no this is not related to anything on here.

I feel bad that I'm not in tears over this, but.....I also don't see why I should be because I'm fairly sure that my suspicions about your motivations are correct
Last edited by Callisto on Wed Nov 12, 2008 1:31 pm, edited 1 time in total.

User avatar
vampirelover
spiffy maximus
spiffy maximus
Posts: 4149
Joined: Tue Apr 17, 2007 8:45 pm
Gender: F
Location: London ish(England), age : 21

Post by vampirelover » Wed Nov 12, 2008 1:23 pm

I want you to ring me
longest with no slips - 2 years , 6 months
time since last slip : 2 days

User avatar
Never Again
quintessential regular
quintessential regular
Posts: 2069
Joined: Mon Dec 27, 2004 3:55 am
Location: USA

Post by Never Again » Thu Nov 13, 2008 6:02 pm

*si*
i 'wrote' love on my arms
and i liked it.
I have love. I have love but I don't know where to put it.

User avatar
Silent_Tears
spiffy maximus
spiffy maximus
Posts: 4278
Joined: Tue Nov 14, 2006 2:44 am
Gender: Female
Location: Kentucky

Post by Silent_Tears » Thu Nov 13, 2008 11:18 pm

I picked up my meds that my friend holds... even though I didn't need a refill yet. I guess I wanted to be able to be able to OD again. I don't know what's going on in my head. I'm so confused. I don't want her to know I have them. I want to be able to have those options again I guess. I hate that the thoughts are already coming back. I also bought a tool. I am not suppose to be here on bus... but here I am. I'm being bad all the way around. :bawl:
Silent's Poetry Spot

My Place- Everyone Welcome

My PBH

Fighting everyday to stay SI free. 8 years and counting. It does get easier. I just wish the thoughts would go away completely.

User avatar
daisy_chain
bus conductor
bus conductor
Posts: 5354
Joined: Mon Mar 28, 2005 8:55 pm

Post by daisy_chain » Sat Nov 15, 2008 8:46 pm

I just want to really matter to somebody and im scared that i never will.
I'm just dreaming out loud.

My Place

User avatar
steady hands
quintessential regular
quintessential regular
Posts: 2245
Joined: Fri Sep 02, 2005 2:05 am

Post by steady hands » Sun Nov 16, 2008 6:50 am

lumbar puncture hole, please stop hurting.

I am deathly afraid that at any second, you will start leaking spinal fluid and I will collapse to the floor.
I think I would've felt better if they'd stitched you up instead of just covering you with a bandaid.

I HATE the hospital, please do not make me go back so they can repuncture me and fill you with blood.


(I don't know if my irrational fear or the fact that I'm talking to a hole in my back is worse. :roll: )

User avatar
Geordie
sprouting branches
sprouting branches
Posts: 1159
Joined: Fri Jan 11, 2008 12:21 pm
Location: Australia
Contact:

Post by Geordie » Sun Nov 16, 2008 2:24 pm

I like her and I hate her. I hate being a teenage girl.

I finally worked out why I can't tell if he's lying.
*HUGS WELCOME* *PMs AWESOME*

http://buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php?t=120671
My place

Not well. Never well. Never will?

User avatar
acdcrocker1909
forum moderator emeritus
forum moderator emeritus
Posts: 10453
Joined: Fri Dec 10, 2004 3:42 am
Gender: Transguy
Location: Little Blue dot in a sea of Red

Post by acdcrocker1909 » Sun Nov 16, 2008 6:04 pm

I do love her. I want things to be perfect.

...and I want to make my love completely public, but I know I can't thanks to conservative bastards.

:bluestar:
It does not do to dwell on dreams, and forget to live - APWBD.


Music is life.. we each have our own symphony.. and we control it for the most part.. sometimes instruments drop out.. and others join in.. but when the music fades and the symphony is done.. then we have created a beautiful, personal piece. - Me.

Less Traveled Roads <-- Everyone Welcome.

Image

User avatar
SplinteredGirl
sock rocker
sock rocker
Posts: 3844
Joined: Thu Apr 26, 2007 11:11 pm
Gender: female
Location: Vancouver

Post by SplinteredGirl » Mon Nov 17, 2008 1:28 am

comming to your house has made me feel better before. just knowing that your there, and your still smiling. i can see her smile in your face. i know that each of us is the closest thing we have to her... i couldnt bring myself to call you back about the babysitting. ive done it before. and ive been fine..
..its just the house is to empty without her. i just dont think i could have done it. theres not one place in this town that i dont have a memory with her.and now i have no one to go on walks around town with.

i miss my best friend.

User avatar
SplinteredGirl
sock rocker
sock rocker
Posts: 3844
Joined: Thu Apr 26, 2007 11:11 pm
Gender: female
Location: Vancouver

Post by SplinteredGirl » Mon Nov 17, 2008 1:33 am

i slipped after a month..
no one knows i slipped..
no one knows about the SI...
i feel like if no one knows, because im hiding it so good, whats the difference?

.nothings going to change.

Locked

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 7 guests