Pelagic's Coping List

tips on how to cope: dealing with your feelings, dealing with the consequences of self-harm in your life. share your ideas and maybe pick up some new skills, too. you don't have to want to stop to learn something new here.

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Pelagic's Coping List

Post by pelagic » Tue Jun 24, 2008 1:39 am

There are a LOT of coping methods in this forum, but what I really need is a huge list for myself. Things that I actually do and will do, instead of just think about. So, here they are. I want to visit my post every day or so, or at least every time I'm online, so that I'll always be remembered by it.

If you want, you can post an idea too. Butyou don't have to. This is really just for me (though you might get some ideas, hopefully?).

Before I SI, I have to do these things first:

-Play my guitar, whether its for five minutes or five hours.
-Stretch for ten minutes. Stretching is good.
-Fifteen sit-ups. Preferably with a lot of upbeat music.
-If I'm able to, go online and talk to youthinbc counsellors through IM. If I cannot talk to them through a computer, then call them. (shudder-- hate talking to people on the phone)
-Have a cup of tea, or a cup of hot water.

Okay. So I have five things I need to do before I SI. These five things are also beneficial (well, the cup of tea is simply indulgence, but I love being warm).

Now, a list of coping methods...

-Play a lot of upbeat/happy music.
-Play videogames.... Super Mario World on my Supernintendo 8) or maybe Super Metroid!
-Watch Invader ZIM.
-Ride my bike.
-Take my dog for a walk.
-Draw or something.
-Write down a bunch of stuff. Anything, just a bunch of stuff.
-Learn something. Go to the library and get a nonfiction book about something.
-Write down THREE positive things about my day. NO NEGATIVES. And write them down no matter what.
-Write down THREE positive things I have done in my life. NO NEGATIVES. And write them down no matter what.

Okay... I will write more later today.

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Post by pelagic » Tue Jun 24, 2008 2:22 am

A bunch of ways to deal with anger!

-Make something, then destroy it.
-Shout out your feelings. Very very loud.
-Make a doll (or use one you already made), and hit it, stomp on it, punch it, call it names, rip off its limbs, etc. Repair it later on.
-Clap really hard.
-Blow up a bunch of balloons, then pop them. Find out different ways to pop them. Sitting on them, kneeling on them, punching them, etc.
-Throw ice in the bathtub, hard enough to shatter it.
-Throwing socks at the wall.
-Throwing bouncy balls at the wall.
-Scribble over people in magazines.
-Make a lot of noise with pots and pans.
-Smash a large stick against a rock.
-Write all the things you hate about yourself. Then rip it up/burn it.
-Pile some pillows together and punch/kick them.
-Run around the living room and up and down the stairs until you can't breathe any more.
-Run around a field while screaming obscene curse words.
-Snap chopsticks in half.
-Rip up a phone book/burn the pages that make you angrier.

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Post by pelagic » Tue Jun 24, 2008 2:35 am

You notice that your speaking in second-person.
You wonder why you seem to do that when writing lists.

Ahem. I'm going to start a list on stuff to keep my mood STABLE.

I think I have bipolar or something, because I'm either really depressed or really angry. i'm only really happy when I'm with somebody and doing something I enjoy. and then i get apathetic if im not all that. all of my moods are extreme, except for the apathy.

So. I want to create a mood that keeps me stable. Something that keeps me happy, yes, but calm and relaxed and comfortable. NOT SAD. Whenever I strive to be really really happy, I sometimes acheive that, but I'm always brought back down to a horrible depression. I don't wnat to be sad, I want to be calm and relaxed and content with my surroundings. And being warm is good. Not being hungry, not being cold, and not being lonely (being alone and lonely are too different things. I like my own company, I don't like being lonely) is a must.

Things to keep me stable:

-Keep myself warm/don't let myself be cold. Wear comfortable clothes.
-Wear fuzzy/happy socks.
-Drink hot water or tea. Or decaf coffee or hot chocolate.
-Aromatherapy essential oils... Light a Vanilla/Ylang Ylang candle, or use a diffuser with warm, strong scents.
-Have a very warm bath with bubbles or bath salts. Light a bunch of candles and read a really good book.
-Snuggle a stuffie and read a book.
-Bundle up in blankets and knit.
-Breathe deeply and keep myself calm.
-Go for a calming walk outside.
-Have a shower.
-Listen to happy, or calming music.
-Hug Hershey and hold Houdini (not at the same time, mind..)
-Watch bees, or birds, or fish (a documentary).

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Post by pelagic » Tue Jun 24, 2008 8:17 pm

How to keep myself from being scared:

-Stay calm.
-Sleep.
-Ask for hugs from everybody.
-Ask for someone to say that they love me.
-Cry until I feel better.
-Go on BUS and lurk.

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Post by angelic212 » Fri Jun 27, 2008 8:16 am

you know this is really helpful post.

this is something i should do myself.
thanks for making this post.

i will try and do this in my journal.

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Re: Pelagic's Coping List

Post by SisterMidnight » Sat Jun 28, 2008 7:01 pm

Great thread, lots of good things to help you cope. I like the idea of making a list of 5 things you have to do before you SI. I also like the suggestion to write down 3 positive things about your day, no negatives. Thanks for all the good ideas.

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Post by pelagic » Tue Jul 01, 2008 12:30 am

^^ Glad you two like the lists...
Hopefully you get some great ideas out of them!

Things to do when I'm alone and it's a nice day:

-walk my dog
-ride my bike
-sunbathe
-take my dog swimming
-go jogging

Things to do when I'm alone and it's night/a gross day:

-have a warm bubble bath
-read
-bake cookies
-make soup
-walk my dog if its just a gross day--if night, hug my dog.
-paint my nails, wear my summer dress, and drink tea.

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Post by pelagic » Tue Jul 08, 2008 7:44 am

Ways to get outside my comfort zone:

-Re-organize my room
-Sleep outside on the trampoline
-Engage in conversation with random strangers
-Go outside every day, instead of staying in and sleeping
-Wear bold outfits as much as possible instead of the average t-shirt and jeans.
-Go for walks without make-up on.

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Post by pelagic » Thu Aug 07, 2008 2:36 am

I realized that I /need/ to be alone every once in a while. While I hate being lonely, I need to have 24hours of alone-ness every week in order to keep my moodiness in check, and to take time to take care of myself. I think I should pick a day where I simply take care of myself and stop worrying about others.

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Post by pelagic » Mon Aug 18, 2008 11:43 am

I used to SI when I was bored.
When I am bored and have access to the computer, I'll keep myself distracted with webcomics and whatnot.

When I do not have access to a computer, I will clean. Yus, clean, even though I hate it with a burning passion.

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Post by I'm.that.forgettable. » Tue Aug 19, 2008 7:08 pm

hey.. I really like the idea of this.
I read somewhere that you're supposed to spend time with just yourself everyday.. it can be doing anything I guess, but I like to spend it not on the computer, or doing anything that involves other people if I can help it.

Oh, and I saw something that I really liked somewhere awhile ago.. It said that everyday, take a couple of minutes and practice breathing.. Sit up as straight as you can, in quiet if it's possible.. leave your arms to your sides or on your lap, just not doing anything... close your eyes and take deep, slow breaths in and out... feel the air coming in and out of your lungs.. filling you up. I think the breath coming out is the most relaxing.. I dunno if it will work for you, but it's something I love to do, if I ever remember :)
hugs and pms are perfectly okay.

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"You know the thing about hope, how it sneaks up behind you when you're sure everything's in the toilet, and starts whispering to you that maybe, just maybe, things could turn around." --Joan Bauer, from Rules of the Road

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Post by angelic212 » Sat Oct 11, 2008 4:27 pm

i like your coping alternatives , i think i will do something similar to this

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Post by pelagic » Mon Oct 13, 2008 11:21 am

^^ Glad you guys like the list!

I'm.That.Forgettable (although you most certainly are not ^^), breathing is actually a great way to elavate your mood and boost your health. I try to do really deep breathing when I feel a panic/anxiety attack coming on. It seems to help a lot!

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Post by pelagic » Mon Oct 13, 2008 11:24 am

Something I just found out today:

I just cried in my mums arms for about twenty minutes tonight. I can't remember the last time I cried near someone else (most people think I simply don't care because I refuse to cry around others).

Getting hugs and being reassured that you are loved can help battle SU urges (actually, I feel incredibly SU when somebody seems to express any love towards me whatsoever, but I feel less inclined to actually do the deed as I am reassured I would hurt my family). If I'm feeling rock bottom, perhaps breaking down in front of my mum will help prevent any nasty urges from becoming reality.

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Post by ReineDuSommeil » Fri Oct 17, 2008 9:52 am

I love this thread! It's amazing!

Thanks honey!

xx

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Post by pelagic » Wed Oct 29, 2008 8:08 am

:D Thanks, ReineDuSommeil!

I will go out with friends at least twice a week outside of school.
I keep sulking and hiding in my misery at home. It's getting out of hand.

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