Finding a therapist

searching_for_solace · Post by **searching_for_solace** » Wed Mar 12, 2008 8:24 pm

I need to find a new therapist. I also need to figure out how to tell my parents that I think I need to go see a different one.

We've quit going to my current one, and we were planning on not going to anyone else. She's just too far and too expensive, and I never felt comfortable talking to her, and in the family sessions I never said anything at all.

How do I go about finding a therapist in my area? What do I say to my parents? They don't want to pay for it. It's expensive, and we're tight on money, but not enough to qualify for anything I don't think.

Our income is always changing year to year cause he is self-employed. My dad paints houses, and it depends on how many people want him to paint their house.

Chaocontrol6 · Post by **Chaocontrol6** » Thu Mar 13, 2008 12:24 am

Hmmm that is a toughy. Could you perhaps talk to your GP or regular doctor to see what else there is available to you? That way he maybe able to point you to a Therapist or the such and it maybe affordable and easy to reach

Jason

searching_for_solace · Post by **searching_for_solace** » Thu Mar 13, 2008 3:59 am

I don't know, perhaps I could try that... but I don't know. I dont think I could talk to her about that. My mom is always in the room, and I hate talking about anything like that in front of my parents.

searching_for_solace · Post by **searching_for_solace** » Fri Mar 14, 2008 2:35 am

Someone, please, answer this? I want things to change for the better but I don't know how. I'm tired of sitting around hoping that I'll just feel better out of nowhere without doing anything about it.

funkymusic · Post by **funkymusic** » Fri Mar 14, 2008 2:59 am

Well, I just read somewhere on here, someone said that finding a T is like finding a pair of jeans! You've got to keep trying them on till you find one that fits. Maybe try explaining this to your mom? Also, my school counselor was very helpful in giving me names. I got my current T as "highly recommended" by her. You should try your school counselor?

Good luck!

With Love and Squalor,
Lena

Cuppy · Post by **Cuppy** » Fri Mar 14, 2008 3:19 am

..but you are doing something about it

right here right now, its a start.

A recommendation from a school counselor seems like a great idea.

searching_for_solace · Post by **searching_for_solace** » Fri Mar 14, 2008 3:26 pm

I am in collage now. There isn't a school counselor.

There is a Personal Wellness Consultant or something like that, but I would have to make an apointment, and drive over an hour to main campus. <_< not going to happen.

balletomane · Post by **balletomane** » Sat Mar 15, 2008 9:58 pm

How old are you? You can ask your mom to leave the room at the doctor's office so you can ask for a referral to a new therapist. Or you can call your old therapist and ask for a referral.

searching_for_solace · Post by **searching_for_solace** » Sat Mar 15, 2008 11:54 pm

Just turned 16.

And I'd have to make an appointment and drive over an hour to get to the other campus to talk to the personal wellness counselor the collage has. Not going to happen.

I am so paranoid. I shut down when people I know well ask me difficult questions, like my family or my friends. I don't trust them for some reason. And I can't talk to my parents about this because I get so anxious and won't answer.

Even if I could work up the confidence to just say it, if they asked me if I wanted to go see someone or get some help, I'd say no by reflex. When asked about problems with me, I deny there is anything wrong, though I know all too well that I need serious help.

Writing a letter would make it into this big thing, which is exaclty what I don't want. Any mention of me not being perfectly fine, my parents get this serious tone and it makes me so uncomfortable. I really, really hate it.

When I first told my parents that I cut myself and I wanted to stop, they were like really?! and I said no, and denied the whole thing. lol. *rolls eyes*

And we talk to the doctor over the phone, and my mom does all the talking. She asks me if there is anything I want to talk to the doctor about and I say no. She tries to hand me the phone, but I won't talk about my issues over the phone cause i'm paranoid my parents are listening in, but i'm too embaressed to take the call outside or in my room, and so I just say nothing.

Cuppy · Post by **Cuppy** » Sun Mar 16, 2008 3:38 am

Just want you to know I read and I care

Can't really think of anything that would help...yet, I'll think on it.

Hang in there and know that people care, ok.

searching_for_solace · Post by **searching_for_solace** » Sun Mar 16, 2008 7:01 pm

Thank you...

I am getting increasingly agitated and paranoid. I know i need to do something, but the longer I wait the harder it gets.

Cuppy · Post by **Cuppy** » Mon Mar 17, 2008 11:18 am

I'm not really coming up with any good solutions. It sounds like it would work best if you could use the phone when no one is around or maybe while you're at college possibly to call your GP and explain the situation to her, she may have some excellent advice or a referral that is in your area and also affordable.
OR
Would it be possible to call and ask for an appointment to talk to the personal wellness consultant over the phone as you're unable to drive there, it could be worth a try anyway.
OR
Can you go thru your phonebook and call T's locally and explain your situation, even if it ends up they can't help, they may be able to offer a referral or something helpful.
As far as being affordable, some T's will work on a sliding scale, they charge depending on income, even if your dad's income fluxuates.

I really feel like it would be best if you could get the lines of communication going with your parents. There may be some helpful info here: http://www.wikihow.com/Talk-to-Parents- ... Understand

or other more in depth info about how to talk to your parents if you do a few searches.
I used to be the same way with my parents at your age, like you were saying, just shutting down like that, so I kinda can understand what you mean. Is it just their initial reaction to kinda freak out?
Maybe if you can just hang in there past their initial over reaction, they'll calm down and be able to discuss things with you in a way you can both handle. Maybe they just aren't understanding the seriousness of your situation because they can't read your mind and if you don't tell them clearly, calmly, and specifically what you need, how are they gonna know?

I wish I could be more helpful, but that's all I can really come up with atm.

Nobody has ever accused me of being too smart that's for sure.

lol

Cuppy · Post by **Cuppy** » Mon Mar 17, 2008 9:02 pm

I've also found http://www.1-800-therapist.com/ in the 'Phone numbers and web links for people in crisis' thread in the Sourcebook here on BUS. I bumped it to the top of Sourcebook so its easier to find. There are quite alot of things there that might be helpful too.

searching_for_solace · Post by **searching_for_solace** » Wed Mar 19, 2008 5:12 pm

Thank you.

I am looking at the link. I want to call the number, but my family is around.

I could take the cell phone and go hang out somewhere in the undeveloped part of the neighborhood. I may do this.

Cuppy · Post by **Cuppy** » Wed Mar 19, 2008 6:56 pm

Good Luck

searching_for_solace · Post by **searching_for_solace** » Wed Mar 19, 2008 7:56 pm

My cell phone wasn't going though with any 1-800 numbers. It went though for normal numbers, but either of the two helplines I tried didn't work! It connected for like one second and then the call ended, and I never heard any rings or anything.

I don't know what to do about this? I want to call from my house but my dad is around and I hate talking on the phone (especially about things like this) in front of my parents.

And now my mom is coming home and i am frustrated.

Cuppy · Post by **Cuppy** » Fri Mar 21, 2008 6:26 pm

Possibly a different phone?
Or maybe you could go to some of the websites connected to the phone #'s and email them instead.

searching_for_solace · Post by **searching_for_solace** » Sun Mar 23, 2008 3:10 am

They don't do emails, says right on the site.

*sigh* it is the end of the week and the parents said they'd have found someone and set up an appointment by now but they haven't.

idork · Post by **idork** » Sun Mar 23, 2008 3:24 am

If they still haven't found someone maybe bring that up to them calmly. Maybe tell them that this is important to you. Tell them that you don't want to wait. Do some research about T's in your area. http://www.psychcentral.com has a search thing where you can find T's in your area. Show them your research. I wish you good luck. Take care.

searching_for_solace · Post by **searching_for_solace** » Wed Mar 26, 2008 6:19 pm

I feel so lost. I am going to break soon if I don't get some help.

I did research, showed it to the parents, and they finally told me last night that they didn't have the money and brushed me off.

No help is coming now.

...

What do you mean there is no ambulance?!

bus

Finding a therapist

Finding a therapist

Who is online