after - no irl

tools to help you assess your urges before you give in to them, and to help you understand and learn from slips after they happen. by posting here, you're saying that you are serious about exploring the feelings behind your self-harm in depth, whether you're ready to stop hurting yourself or not. to request posting access, click usergroups above and join before and after.

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after - no irl

Post by the edge of the world » Fri Feb 15, 2008 10:07 am

After:

Questions to Answer After A Slip
slips are chances to learn. you figure out what stresses are still too hard for you and you can work on how you'll deal with them next time you run into them. so instead of beating yourself up, take action.
  • have you taken care of your physical wounds? if not, go do that now. we'll wait.

    don't need to, just scratches
  • what had happened just before?

    couldn't focus on homework because my brain went into hurt-self mode because I'm too tired and stressed
  • what were you thinking and feeling?

    I was feeling hopeless that I'd be able to finish my homework. I just want to finish and go to sleep
  • why did you end up hurting yourself then instead of some other time? was there an event that was the final straw? what was it?

    i'm not sure. no final straw event, really
  • how did the situation get to the final straw stage? trace it back through the events that led up to the last event. look for some point at which you could have made a different decision and not arrived at the final straw.

    I've been stressing about homework deadlines all week and getting a new roommate and therefore staying up late to distract myself from thinking, and being tired and stressed isn't the best combo
  • were there outside factors like drugs, alsohol, being off your meds, lack of sleep, etc? can you address those in the future? how?

    lack of sleep
    I will try not to procrastinate as much and do my work ahead of time.
  • what other ways of coping did you try besides self-harm? how well did they work?

    I tried
    eating chocolate
    drinking water
    getting online
    taking a nap
  • in retrospect, are there coping methods that you now realize might have helped? what were they?

    not really... just don't put myself in this situation every thursday night
    I guess being with people would have helped, but everyone is asleep
  • name at least two things you will do to help yourself remember those coping methods if you end up in this situation again.

    1. set a time limit on my internet time
    2. study with friends
  • how do you feel about the situation that led to self-harm now? is it resolved? if not, what are some steps you might take toward resolution?

    it's not resolved. i'll go finish the stupid chemistry when i'm done with this

  • are you likely to be in that emotional place again? how will you recognize it when you're in that situation?

    I wasn't in a very emotional place
    I'll recognize by how I talk to myself really not-nicely

  • what will you try before you resort to self-harm if you're in that situation again? list three specific things you will commit to trying.
1. looking at my snowflake book
2. getting online
3. setting an alarm and lying down for ten minutes

About Opportunities to SI
Opportunity to Self-Harm seems to be a common theme. Think about why opportunities are important to slips and learn why opportunity is important to you.
  • What made that opportunity more appealing than any other?

    no roommate, nobody around
    annoyed with myself
    tired
  • Did you make an opportunity or was it there for the taking?

    it was here for the taking, though I went and found something to hurt myself with in my bag
  • What would you have done if there was no opportunity, how would you have handled your urge?

    I probably would have found another way to hurt myself... or I would have stared at my homework blankly for a longer time.
  • If there had been no opportunity would your urge to self-harm have increased or decreased?

    it depends why there was no opportunity...
  • What consitutes opportunity for you? Being alone? having new tools? waiting for the right feeling?

    being alone
    feeling out of control of my negative thoughts
  • If your opportunties were taken away, how would you feel?
fucking pissed.

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Post by caged bird » Sat Feb 16, 2008 2:21 am

i' sorry you felt so bad and SIed. perhaps if you feel the urge again you sould spend some time writing a big list of alternative distractions.

perahps having your new roomate around will help a little with the urges, it's really good tha you can recognise some of the triggers for it.

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