i need to know (could i be feeding my own maina swing)

tips on how to cope: dealing with your feelings, dealing with the consequences of self-harm in your life. share your ideas and maybe pick up some new skills, too. you don't have to want to stop to learn something new here.

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mikedemons
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i need to know (could i be feeding my own maina swing)

Post by mikedemons » Thu Dec 27, 2007 6:23 am

i have been wounder if maybe i could be feeding my own mania by takeing so much pride in this streak of si free days becuse it's after midnight so even thoe i wont add another day onto my streak untill i wake up tomorrow i havent had no real urges tonight so i'm happy and proud of that to and it seems like the joy in sayng that to myself out loud or just thinking it makes me feel i can just bounce off the walls like i go up way past the base line i have been at durning this up streak if fact this up streak started when i made it thru sunday night i took a shower to wash off the marker i had all over my arms from subing my tools for a marker that when it hit me i made it thru the night and tears came out then as i was washing the marker i started just laughing uncontrolable
and that was the last thing i can recall before the maina kicked in
Sometimes I feel like my sun as run away. Drifting from here to there and the feeling stays the same. The thoughts stay in my head and they always haunt me.......
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megseh
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Post by megseh » Thu Dec 27, 2007 6:59 am

I can't give you much advice about the mania (sorry) but I can agree with you on the happy and proud feeling you get when you've been a few days without SI. It's the first time in a long time I felt like I don't NEED it, and it makes me very happy.
"So, this is my life. And I want you to know that I am both happy and sad and I'm still trying to figure out how that could be."-The Perks of Being a Wallflower
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mikedemons
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Post by mikedemons » Thu Dec 27, 2007 7:06 am

that the way i am feeling tonight i normaly have urges all night long till finaly eather give up and give in to or stay strong and pass out for the night and going to sleep as not been and easy thing for me lately eather
i am so exsited that i am so close to one full week now
Sometimes I feel like my sun as run away. Drifting from here to there and the feeling stays the same. The thoughts stay in my head and they always haunt me.......
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megseh
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Post by megseh » Thu Dec 27, 2007 7:09 am

yay for us! It's only been 3 days for me, but that is an accomplishment for me.
"So, this is my life. And I want you to know that I am both happy and sad and I'm still trying to figure out how that could be."-The Perks of Being a Wallflower
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mikedemons
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Post by mikedemons » Thu Dec 27, 2007 7:12 am

:rofl: :1hug3: :moo: :moo:


CLAPS

yeah this streak as been my best in a while
Sometimes I feel like my sun as run away. Drifting from here to there and the feeling stays the same. The thoughts stay in my head and they always haunt me.......
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Licentia Poetica
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Post by Licentia Poetica » Thu Dec 27, 2007 2:38 pm

I very much doubt it's possible to "feed your mania". Well done on your streak :redstar:
:redstar: the time to tell a person you care is now :redstar: the paper crane chain of hope :redstar:

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mikedemons
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Post by mikedemons » Thu Dec 27, 2007 5:38 pm

thanks i've just noticed that when i think about good things about myself and exspeal my si free streak i get so exsided inside i feel i'll expode
Sometimes I feel like my sun as run away. Drifting from here to there and the feeling stays the same. The thoughts stay in my head and they always haunt me.......
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My place --->http://buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php?t=120025

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