write down the shadow that's hiding behind the urge. look at it. ask yourself:
- how will this situation or feeling change if i hurt myself?
i will be more focused. calmer. not so ... dissociated and angry. - what will hurting myself bring to the situation? what will it take away from the situation?
brings calm. takes away feeling of independence and security. - how do i want to feel about this in the long run? is hurting myself likely to get me closer to or farther from feeling that way?
i want to feel like i can battle these demons without causing further harm. hurting mysel fwill bring me farther from feeling tha tway. - if hurting myself seems like my best option right now, how long will the relief it brings last? what will i do then?
the relief will last for an hour this time, maybe. maybe less, maybe more. then i'll... i dunno. feel still relieved, just not AS relieved. - what is something i could do now instead of hurting myself? how will it change the situation i'm in? how long will that change last, and what will i do then?
snap rubber bands, continue playing with my spikey ball. throw my tennis ball aginst the wlal. it will bring calm. that will last for a little while. hten i'll... maybe ea tsomething? - how will i feel tomorrow if i hurt myself? how will i feel tomorrow if i do the other thing i came up with?
i will feel deeply ditsrssed coz my gf will get angry again. if i do the other thing, i'll feel a bit better probably. - what do i really want to do right now? how can i best honor the self-protective instinct that has me wanting to self-injure right now?
what i REALly want to do right now is SCREAM. in fear. and in rage. but i dunno how to reconcile those conflicting feelings. so i dunt know how to honor this either.
urges aren't necessarily the enemy. they happen for reasons, and they're an expression of a desire to stay alive and stay sane and keep coping. remember that.
More Before Questions To Answer
- Why do I feel I need to hurt myself? What has brought me to this point?
im overhwlmeed with school work. im trying to write a psych papoer on DID which triggers me lots. - Have I been here before? What did I do to deal with it? How did I feel then?
yes i have. i took a break. i felt better hten. - What I have done to ease this discomfort so far? What else can I do that won't hurt me?
ive tried to take a slight break. and release stress some other ways. but i thasnt worked so far. i can still try to play with my tennis ball. and mabye eat some peanuts if that works. - How do I feel right now?
overhwelmed. scared, angry. - How will I feel when I am hurting myself?
calm, calm calm. - How will I feel after hurting myself? How will I feel tomorrow morning?
ashamed. scared of my gf's reaction. tomorrow i'll feel ashamed. and sad probably and stuff. - Can I avoid this stressor, or deal with it better in the future?
i can't really avoid it. school stress WILl stress me out in the future. but i can take more breaks. - Do I need to hurt myself?
no. but i want to. still.
