Rant, rave, rage and riot *la*
- steady hands
- quintessential regular
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- the edge of the world
- knows the ropes
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- Location: the edge of the world, duh!...
I hate therapy. I hate sitting there and talking about me. I hate sitting there and explaining all the details of my life and getting nowhere. I hate the question "how did that make you feel?" I don't fucking remember how I felt when I was seven years old. I can barely remember what I ate for breakfast or whether I ate breakfast. How am I suppose to remember how i felt at seven? I don't care how I got here. I just want to get better. I hate this. I hate feeling like I have to hide my mind because it's dark. It's not like I'm going to kill myself anymore, but of course they thoughts haven't completely disappeared. They've shifted. I hate that everything is dull. I hate that this distant remembering just makes everything feel more dull. I hate that I pay money and go through all this effort with my stupid health insurance just to sit there and fester while jabbering on about nothing in particular. There is NOTHING in what we talk about. It makes me want to break something. It makes me what to hurt to just to feel something again than to be reminded, you are dull you are dull you are dull. NOd nod, and how does that make you feel? bang bang, that's how it makes me feel, dammit! there are no strong feelings right now, I don't know how I feel, STOP ASKING!
- steady hands
- quintessential regular
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- MusicalMorphine
- growing roots
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- Location: Hastings, England
I cannot write this stupid essay at all. It's been nearly two weeks since it was set, I was supposed to hand it in monday but I hadn't finished it and I didn't have that teacher for the rest of the week, and I didn't go see him for help because I didn't want to and I figured I would be able to pull something out. But I really really don't know what to write.
*think Prof. Higgins in My Fair Lady* Damn damn damn damn damn. I really didn't mean for anyone to see me! I want a gosh darned invisibility button!!!! Can I order one of those?
Eisa = Beasty's Twin
Beasty's Place!
- Licentia Poetica
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I CANT DO ALL THESE FREAKING ASSIGNMENTS.
I'M TOO STUPID.
I'M TOO STUPID.
If we knew each other's secrets, what comforts we should find.
John Churton Collins
- Arcana
- forum moderator emeritus
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- Location: My body's with me, no idea where my mind's at
I KNOW that I don't have schitzophrenia. I am well aware of that fact. Did I say I was afraid of being schitzophrenic? No. I said I was unhappy and had eating issues.
So fuck you very much, and goodnight!
So fuck you very much, and goodnight!
"I'd rather be hated for who I am than loved for who I am not."-- Kurt Cobain
I'm not a work of art, I'm a piece of work.
I'm not a work of art, I'm a piece of work.
- xunwrittenx
- sprouting branches
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- sprouting branches
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- Porcelain_Doll
- growing roots
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Why don't you get what this means to me?!?!?!
Never to suffer would never to have been blessed.
-Edgar Allan Poe
http://buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php?t=110034
-Edgar Allan Poe
http://buslist.org/phpBB/viewtopic.php?t=110034
- MusicalMorphine
- growing roots
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- Joined: Wed Jul 19, 2006 5:51 pm
- Gender: Female
- Location: Hastings, England
Most people have at least one person that they can talk to about anything, someone they know is going to be there for them no matter what, someone to laugh with and to cry with, a brother, a sister, a best friend. I have no one.
It's Saturday afternoon and I'm still sitting at home. I wanted to go to the cinema today, I posted a bulletin on myspace to see if anyone wanted to come, then go down to the bonfire tonight, but no-one replied. I text my friend, who half the the time doesn't reply to me anyway, and asked her what she was doing tomorrow, but no reply.
I must be a really lame person not to be able to find one single person to go to town with.
I suck, maybe even more than I thought.
It's Saturday afternoon and I'm still sitting at home. I wanted to go to the cinema today, I posted a bulletin on myspace to see if anyone wanted to come, then go down to the bonfire tonight, but no-one replied. I text my friend, who half the the time doesn't reply to me anyway, and asked her what she was doing tomorrow, but no reply.
I must be a really lame person not to be able to find one single person to go to town with.
I suck, maybe even more than I thought.
-
- sprouting branches
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- Licentia Poetica
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I have fucking scars. Yes. Get over it.
What's done is done, how is yelling at me now going to help? What do you want me to fucking do, wave my magic wand and make them go away?? WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO.
They are SCARS not cuts. If they were CUTS they wouldn't be half FADED, would they?
Fuck you.
What's done is done, how is yelling at me now going to help? What do you want me to fucking do, wave my magic wand and make them go away?? WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO.
They are SCARS not cuts. If they were CUTS they wouldn't be half FADED, would they?
Fuck you.
If we knew each other's secrets, what comforts we should find.
John Churton Collins
fucking major league baseball. taking up House's time slot.
I IS NEEDING MAH HOUSE!!!
I IS NEEDING MAH HOUSE!!!
Eisa = Beasty's Twin
Beasty's Place!
roffle. heathenPink Spider wrote:i is needing mah baseballSilverCandlesticks wrote:fucking major league baseball. taking up House's time slot.
I IS NEEDING MAH HOUSE!!!
Eisa = Beasty's Twin
Beasty's Place!
xDSilverCandlesticks wrote:roffle. heathenPink Spider wrote:i is needing mah baseballSilverCandlesticks wrote:fucking major league baseball. taking up House's time slot.
I IS NEEDING MAH HOUSE!!!
i've never seen an episode of house....ever xD
-marya hornbacher
spidey immer voran
(spidey ever onward)
pink spider, you should watch house- it is legendary. I love House's cyniscm...
anywho- rant of the day:
*brace yourself*
THIS IS SO FREAKING RIDICULOUS! ALL I WANT TO DO IS STOP CUTTING MYSELF BUT IT IS SO HARD, I REALISE THIS- AM WILLING TO GO IP BUT PEOPLE ARE MAKING THIS EXCEPTIONALLY HARD FOR ME. I HATE BEING A CHILD AND HAVING TO RELY ON OTHERS TO BE COMPETENT AND GET STUFF DONE! MY FATHER DOES NOT UNDERSTAND THIS, IF HE DID HE WOULDNT HAVE USED MY THERAPY AS SOME TYPE OF LEVERAGE IN HIS DIVORCE FIGHTS AND SUCH. NOW THE SCHOOL COUNCILLOUR AND MY T (WHO ISNT MY T FOR THE MEANTIME, DUE TO COMPLICATIONS AND THE FACT THAT MY DAD IS A IMMATURE GIT!) ARE HAVING TO CONFER WITH EACHOTHER AND I DONT EVEN KNOW WHATS HAPPENING. I JUST WANT TO GET BETTER ASAP. I AM WILLING TO GO IP . I HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS. HOW OFTEN DO THEY HAVE A 16 YEAR OLD WHO IS WILLING TO DO THIS!!!!????I HAVE PAST THE WHOLE DENIAL THING AND JUST WANT SOME NORMALITY IN MY LIFE. I CANT DO IT ON MY OWN. HOW BAD DO THEY WANT IT TO GET???? I NEED MORE HELP. CANT THEY SEE THIS!???!! I SLIPPED AGAIN TODAY . THIS IS SO STUPID AND HAS GONE WAY TOO FAR!!
ahhh. feels better
anywho- rant of the day:
*brace yourself*
THIS IS SO FREAKING RIDICULOUS! ALL I WANT TO DO IS STOP CUTTING MYSELF BUT IT IS SO HARD, I REALISE THIS- AM WILLING TO GO IP BUT PEOPLE ARE MAKING THIS EXCEPTIONALLY HARD FOR ME. I HATE BEING A CHILD AND HAVING TO RELY ON OTHERS TO BE COMPETENT AND GET STUFF DONE! MY FATHER DOES NOT UNDERSTAND THIS, IF HE DID HE WOULDNT HAVE USED MY THERAPY AS SOME TYPE OF LEVERAGE IN HIS DIVORCE FIGHTS AND SUCH. NOW THE SCHOOL COUNCILLOUR AND MY T (WHO ISNT MY T FOR THE MEANTIME, DUE TO COMPLICATIONS AND THE FACT THAT MY DAD IS A IMMATURE GIT!) ARE HAVING TO CONFER WITH EACHOTHER AND I DONT EVEN KNOW WHATS HAPPENING. I JUST WANT TO GET BETTER ASAP. I AM WILLING TO GO IP . I HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS. HOW OFTEN DO THEY HAVE A 16 YEAR OLD WHO IS WILLING TO DO THIS!!!!????I HAVE PAST THE WHOLE DENIAL THING AND JUST WANT SOME NORMALITY IN MY LIFE. I CANT DO IT ON MY OWN. HOW BAD DO THEY WANT IT TO GET???? I NEED MORE HELP. CANT THEY SEE THIS!???!! I SLIPPED AGAIN TODAY . THIS IS SO STUPID AND HAS GONE WAY TOO FAR!!
ahhh. feels better
We are the girls with anxiety disorders, filled appointment books, five-year plans. We take ourselves very, very seriously. We are the peacemakers, the do-gooders, the givers, the savers. We are on time, overly prepared, well read, and witty, intellectually curious, always moving… We drink coffee, a lot of it. We are on birth control, Prozac, and multivitamins… We are relentless, judgmental with ourselves, and forgiving to others. We are the daughters of the feminists who said, “You can be anything,” and we heard, “You have to be everything." - Courtney Martin.
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