Secrets(inspired by PostSecret)-Please Stay Safe!
i pretend like im gettin better but that's just it, i'm pretending. i still hate myself. i'd still give anything to be as thin as a catwalk model. i still think about cutting. i'm still afraid that you'll just turn around one day and say you never loved me and that it was all a lie and that your leaving me because you're bored and because i'm not good enough in bed.
PM's ok
drinking makes me feel confident. it makes me feel better about being me. it makes me feel happy. and that's the reason why i drink, to feel something good for a change.
edited to add:
seeing hot girls that are my type turns me on more than you do right now
drinking makes me feel confident. it makes me feel better about being me. it makes me feel happy. and that's the reason why i drink, to feel something good for a change.
edited to add:
seeing hot girls that are my type turns me on more than you do right now
Last edited by Callisto on Sat Sep 30, 2006 10:46 pm, edited 1 time in total.
- Quiet little Angel
- just plain inspiring
- Posts: 7754
- Joined: Wed Nov 02, 2005 2:10 pm
- Location: somewhere between blue tulips and anxiety...
i sometimes wish my dad would actually hit me... that way i'd have something to show for the pain he's causing me... that way people might understand it...
pm's ok...
pm's ok...
Last edited by Quiet little Angel on Sun Oct 01, 2006 11:24 am, edited 1 time in total.
/May
Never underestimate the power of silence...
micro-chipped mental cyber twins taking over NewZealand...
ever reached out for someones hand only to find it wasn't there?
My place of happy-scared-random-thoughts dealing with motherhood and anxiety, visitors welcome
Never underestimate the power of silence...
micro-chipped mental cyber twins taking over NewZealand...
ever reached out for someones hand only to find it wasn't there?
My place of happy-scared-random-thoughts dealing with motherhood and anxiety, visitors welcome
PM's ok.
I want people to hate me, yet I'm so scared of being alone.
I'm so scared of judgement that I stop myself from doing things.
I hate Hawaiian people who think that Hawaii is theirs and that haoles should leave. I know it's racist, but I can't help it.
I think I like someone else. I may not love him anymore. And I'm scared that he may not really love me. It's been so long.
I am so nervous. His return is going to change everything. Is it wrong of me to not want him to go to my school? I'm trying to build a new life, I may not be able to do that with him there.
I plagiarized work for the last three years. I'm still going to, just not in English.
I want people to hate me, yet I'm so scared of being alone.
I'm so scared of judgement that I stop myself from doing things.
I hate Hawaiian people who think that Hawaii is theirs and that haoles should leave. I know it's racist, but I can't help it.
I think I like someone else. I may not love him anymore. And I'm scared that he may not really love me. It's been so long.
I am so nervous. His return is going to change everything. Is it wrong of me to not want him to go to my school? I'm trying to build a new life, I may not be able to do that with him there.
I plagiarized work for the last three years. I'm still going to, just not in English.
The lightning and the thunder
They go and they come
But the stars and the stillness
Are always at home.
<a href="http://www.fastweb.com/ib/aff-1f/6NP98A4H90UNCJF" title="FastWeb: Scholarships, Financial Aid and Colleges" target="blank"><img></a>
They go and they come
But the stars and the stillness
Are always at home.
<a href="http://www.fastweb.com/ib/aff-1f/6NP98A4H90UNCJF" title="FastWeb: Scholarships, Financial Aid and Colleges" target="blank"><img></a>
- mephistopheles
- cow control
- Posts: 24355
- Joined: Thu May 26, 2005 4:40 pm
- Location: London
- mephistopheles
- cow control
- Posts: 24355
- Joined: Thu May 26, 2005 4:40 pm
- Location: London
I love you. I don't tell you because...well...I think you know. I hope you know. But I do. Anyway. I love you more than him. Even if you don't believe it. Even if I didn't believe it to start with.
- powdahchica
- growing roots
- Posts: 960
- Joined: Mon Sep 06, 2004 10:53 pm
- MusicalMorphine
- growing roots
- Posts: 819
- Joined: Wed Jul 19, 2006 5:51 pm
- Gender: Female
- Location: Hastings, England
I need someone. I know people say they don't, and it's kinda materialistic, but I do. And I'm afraid I won't have for a long time. Even If I did, I don't know if I'd be able to get close. I dream about having someone that would understand, and be cool about it.
How am I ever going to if I can't ----- and I can't-----?
How am I ever going to if I can't ----- and I can't-----?
- ViolinPlayingGoat
- bus mechanic
- Posts: 3062
- Joined: Mon Mar 17, 2003 8:28 pm
- Location: MK, UK
- Contact:
i'm falling again. and i keep trying to tell myself that i;m not cos i think that will bring me back up, but i am. i can;t help it.
i thought i was doing so well.
i should never acknowledge that i am though, it always goes downhill when i say to myself 'i am doing well'.
but i didnt go to see her today. that was strong.
i thought i was doing so well.
i should never acknowledge that i am though, it always goes downhill when i say to myself 'i am doing well'.
but i didnt go to see her today. that was strong.
'cos i am a rocket on fire[[alone on its journey, home to the quickening ground with no-one there to catch it]]
-kate bush
You do it to yourself, you do, that's what really hurts,
you do it to yourself, just you, you and no-one else
{radiohead}
*~*happiness isn't happiness without a violin playing goat*~*
-kate bush
You do it to yourself, you do, that's what really hurts,
you do it to yourself, just you, you and no-one else
{radiohead}
*~*happiness isn't happiness without a violin playing goat*~*
- marshmallowfluff
- forum moderator emeritus
- Posts: 16914
- Joined: Tue Aug 16, 2005 11:52 pm
- Gender: Female
- Location: South Yorkshire, UK Age: 26
- MusicalMorphine
- growing roots
- Posts: 819
- Joined: Wed Jul 19, 2006 5:51 pm
- Gender: Female
- Location: Hastings, England
- Quiet little Angel
- just plain inspiring
- Posts: 7754
- Joined: Wed Nov 02, 2005 2:10 pm
- Location: somewhere between blue tulips and anxiety...
Pm's ok...
i'm scared of the sleep-over tomorrow... i'm scared they'll see my scars and recent cuts when i sleep... or that i'll panic and they'll see it... or i'll break down and cry for no reason... they're my friends and i love them, but i don't want them to ever see that side of me... it'd only freak them out...
i'm scared of the sleep-over tomorrow... i'm scared they'll see my scars and recent cuts when i sleep... or that i'll panic and they'll see it... or i'll break down and cry for no reason... they're my friends and i love them, but i don't want them to ever see that side of me... it'd only freak them out...
/May
Never underestimate the power of silence...
micro-chipped mental cyber twins taking over NewZealand...
ever reached out for someones hand only to find it wasn't there?
My place of happy-scared-random-thoughts dealing with motherhood and anxiety, visitors welcome
Never underestimate the power of silence...
micro-chipped mental cyber twins taking over NewZealand...
ever reached out for someones hand only to find it wasn't there?
My place of happy-scared-random-thoughts dealing with motherhood and anxiety, visitors welcome
After we broke up i cut once for everytime we had kissed everytime i had said i love you, so i couldnt forget them .....i though they would be the last time i would ever get to hold you or tell you how i felt, how much i love you, when we got back together i cut so i would remember it a noticeable mark that would stand out (but only to me). Then he has come along and is trying to spoil everything, he is the source of my anger but i dont want you to not be friends with him, she can buy you things when i cant and i am the person who loves you more than life, im jealous and so very ashamed to admit it, jealous of her and jealous of him, jealous of the people who can tlk to you whenever they like, jealous of the people who can meet you at the weekends......im so ashamed
~ pm's welcome~
~ pm's welcome~
If you think outside the box there's no such thing as square one.
No matter which sleeve you wear your heart,
Whichever way you wear your crown,
Tomorrow is another day to turn it all around
I will stop when I'm ready I'll shown everyone my cards
But for now I'll keep on playing even when the game gets hard.
19/07/1952 - 30/12/2013 Never Ever Forgotten
13/05/14 - I Love Her
19/4/15 - The Day I Said Yes
17/06/17 - Rings swapped, Hearts interlocked
<-- Marlo & Mookau-->
Caffiene Addict since 2004
- Licentia Poetica
- forum moderator emeritus
- Posts: 24935
- Joined: Sat Jan 25, 2003 10:06 am
- Gender: Female
- Location: Australia
- Contact:
I always fall asleep wishing it'd be the last thing I ever do.
If we knew each other's secrets, what comforts we should find.
John Churton Collins
- WorkDaySarcasm
- chasing buses
- Posts: 29333
- Joined: Tue Feb 21, 2006 11:14 pm
- Gender: Awesome
- Location: United in the Kingdom
-deep down inside i've never stopped hating myself.
-For ages i lied to myself about having a eating disorder and that im been moving on, but its got worse.
-i act strong and unemotional when really i am weak and long tyo show emotion to people.
-i have sexual feelings for girls as well as guys, but none of my mates know.
-everyone thinks ive stoped SIing but ive just got beta at hiding it.
-For ages i lied to myself about having a eating disorder and that im been moving on, but its got worse.
-i act strong and unemotional when really i am weak and long tyo show emotion to people.
-i have sexual feelings for girls as well as guys, but none of my mates know.
-everyone thinks ive stoped SIing but ive just got beta at hiding it.
"A junkie is someone who uses their body to tell society that something is wrong.”
[PBH] . [Expressions] . [Place]
3 years 2 month // 3 minor slip ups
- mephistopheles
- cow control
- Posts: 24355
- Joined: Thu May 26, 2005 4:40 pm
- Location: London
I will never be thin enough
yes. thank you for signing me up to a program which makes me feel watched all the time. that doesn't fuel my schizophrenic tendencies at all.
yes. thank you for signing me up to a program which makes me feel watched all the time. that doesn't fuel my schizophrenic tendencies at all.
Who is online
Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 212 guests