BDD & Self Esteem & Narcissism

flipflopfetish · Post by **flipflopfetish** » Tue Oct 03, 2006 2:47 am

OK. I've been doing a lot of research on body image disorders lately because I'm a geek like that, and a lot of what I've found applies to me because I have self-esteem issues and think I'm ugly and all that shit. And when I get to the bit on every site where they say people with body image disorders usually truly believe they are ugly and the distorted image they have of themselves is correct because they are seeing this, and my first thought is, "Yes, this is me, but I'm actually ugly" and then I'm like, "But what if I'm not, and this is a disorder" "Emily, hun, you're just blaming your hideousness on a disorder to make yourself feel better" "But really, there's no way of knowing, I might be pretty, right?"
I continue thinking this way for a bit, and then I think how every other person who has BDD is at least convinced of their ugliness and why must I be so narcissistic, and with this post I'm not actually looking for help on my body image (because I don't think it's that horrible at this point) but more reassurance that there are other people who think that way, not just me.

last_day · Post by **last_day** » Tue Oct 03, 2006 7:11 am

I feel that way, too. I truly believe I'm ugly and don't understand how certain people can think I'm pretty/beautiful let alone mediocre. So, yes, I think that way, also.

5th section · Post by **5th section** » Tue Oct 03, 2006 2:30 pm

Sounds like me as well - I end up thinking like this about everything, not just appearance. I don't think it's narcissistic, it's just a struggle when you're convinced of one thing and someone's telling you something else, whether you'd like it to be true or not. I've felt like that many times...am I wrong? are they wrong?...end up going round in circles. It's all too familiar!

recovering4me · Post by **recovering4me** » Tue Oct 03, 2006 7:56 pm

yeah i do the same thing hon.... but lemme see ur pic and i'll be the judge if ur ugly or not

*giggles* im sure you aren't ugly! nobody is.

moo-moo · Post by **moo-moo** » Wed Oct 04, 2006 12:46 am

i rhink the same thing. ppl say i am pretty/beautiful, and i am thinking in my head that they are just saying it to say it and do not really mean it. i get pissed at them afterwards cause i think they r lying.

Licentia Poetica · Post by **Licentia Poetica** » Wed Oct 04, 2006 1:22 am

You know, once in a while (uually when i'm wearing fairly generic clothing) I'll accidentally glance at myself in a shop window or reflection or whatever, and for the split second that I think I'm looking at someone else, my mind thinks "oh look at them I wish I could be them". & then I realise its me & the ugliness & fatness comes back.

It's the strangest thing.

moo-moo · Post by **moo-moo** » Wed Oct 04, 2006 1:27 am

wow. happens to me like 3 times a year, mabe 4?

Skyeler · Post by **Skyeler** » Wed Oct 04, 2006 3:31 am

I've actually been diagnosed with BDD, so I understand... IT takes a lot of work to start to think that the reason you think you're ugly is because what you see in the mirror is ugly to you because you have BDD.

It's confusing as hell, and it's harsh to deal with. And I wis I could say something more constructive, but my brain is dead.

moo-moo · Post by **moo-moo** » Wed Oct 04, 2006 4:03 am

i am srry your brain is dead.

Skyeler · Post by **Skyeler** » Wed Oct 04, 2006 4:05 am

thanks,

flipflopfetish · Post by **flipflopfetish** » Wed Oct 04, 2006 5:04 am

yes. hopefully your brain shall get better soon.

thank you for all of the replies

collide · Post by **collide** » Thu Oct 05, 2006 7:50 pm

yeah i do have body images looks too, and think i am ugly and fat whenever i say these things friends and bf say i am thin and not...but i don't think like someone said that this has anything about narcisstic disorder....if u want to know more about narssictic disorders i can tell u....i know one person, my mom who has all the characteristics except she isn't diagnosed...

collide

SilentFutility · Post by **SilentFutility** » Wed Oct 18, 2006 8:32 pm

erm, this thread is also for people with low self-esteem, i think..anyway does anybody else just go to sleep thinking, what's the point in tomorrow? or what is me existing actually worth to the world? etc..if so..please say? or help

Licentia Poetica · Post by **Licentia Poetica** » Thu Oct 19, 2006 12:08 am

Silentfutility - you are definately not alone.

flipflopfetish · Post by **flipflopfetish** » Thu Oct 19, 2006 4:37 am

nope, not alone

i wish i could help you

SilentFutility · Post by **SilentFutility** » Thu Oct 19, 2006 7:30 pm

hey, thanks everyone.. it's nice to be able to talk to people with the same problem..instead of everyone you know and then they don't understand, or they are ashamed of me..or scared

anyway.. thanks

flipflopfetish · Post by **flipflopfetish** » Fri Oct 20, 2006 1:56 am

well, if you ever need to talk, i'm usually here o.0

it's really cool that a thread i started has survived this long! hopefully i didn't just jinx it though x.X

SilentFutility · Post by **SilentFutility** » Fri Oct 20, 2006 8:55 pm

Oh thank you, and erm, same to you too

i'm watching this topic, and i check it most normal nights, so even if you have jinxed the thread, i'll just help you keep it going when nobody else talks

bus

BDD & Self Esteem & Narcissism

BDD & Self Esteem & Narcissism

i hope this isn't off topic

Thank You

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