What to do when others say that you are a danger?

[scorpioscar]

Has anybody had a close friend turn on you telling others that I am a danger to them, members of my family as well as myself. She went so far as to say that once I finished cutting myself I would cut my grandchild. I have been cut free for over 18 months and now she is mad at a situation she created but is blaming me. I am so upset about this alegation and am using all the coping and DBT skills I can to just write this all down in my journal and come to this site for some input. HELP PLEASE

[Spidey]

Could you give her any information about SI? Either from Deb's site (selfharm.net) or if you're seeing a professional who knows and can deal with it any information from them?

If you're not comfortable, you don't have to refer them to the forum (although the friends and family sectionw ould be very helpful), but print off information from the selfharm.net site, or direct them to there?

Welcome to BUS! Have a welcome !

[strmdncr]

I agree with MercySnow, you could possibly print off the information for your friend. It sounds like you've done a lot of work for yourself and I'm sorry to hear that this person has said something so disturbing to you. I hope things get resolved in as best a manner as possible for you.

[VowsOfSadness]

Once, after I got out of the hospital I wasn't allowed to see my baby cousin because the thought I might cut her. I know it's hard but you just have to educate these people and tell them how well you have been doing w/o si!

[black_23]

My b/f once tried to say that to me when my cutting was getting out of control, that I couldn't be trusted. I think it was a scare tactic as much as anything (well I hope so). I agree with everyone else its a really hard comment to take and deal with, try providing them with as much info as poss about it, you've done so well dont lose sight of that. Take care x

[tai-dah67]

I know how you feel I lost one friend that thought I was a danger to her child. Even after trying to explain my problems. Some people will never understand and that is a deep hurt. I have a grandchild that stays with my parents because they say they are afraid of my panic attacks but I know it has a lot to do with si. People or family think you are just unpredictable and will go crazy at a drop of a hat. It should be me raising my grandson. But I'm not" mentally stable enough" for anyone. This addiction is personal, private as if I would even endanger a child. It still pains me when I'm not asked to babysit. It makes me angry and sad. To me there's just not enough said on the subject to educate more people its not just a young person just going through a thing. I started when I was thirty five. People are afraid of what they don't understand...

[plantt]

to be blunt.... have you ever given them any reason they might think that? eg. getting explosively angry? throwing things? yelling? threatening either to hurt yourself or others?

i know nothing about you. & can imagine that it'd be really tough to have someone say you're a danger to others.
especially after going 18 months w/o hurting yourself.

i'm wondering if the friend has any reason for thinking that you might be a danger.... or if it's simply meanness.

[scorpioscar]

Thank all of you for your helpful and understanding input. I am still at the point that I think that anything I do will be taken and used against me, as the other person has done nothing more than escalate her verbal anger towards me. My son has been a blessing trying to explain to my granddaughter that I am not the monster her mother is saying I am. I am finding strength in this website and the understanding help that is offered here. I do find myself dwelling on how I felt when I was SH'ing at my worst and know I am no where near that point now. But it has still crossed my mind that maybe one small cut or burn might make me feel better, but I haven't acted out on those impulses. Thank God for all of you and great DBT therapy.