Things Left Unsaid - Version 3.0 *Language*

red umbrellas · Post by **red umbrellas** » Sun Jun 04, 2006 3:07 pm

you hurt me so much last night...perhaps that is irrational to be so upset...but god it hurt. i wish you could realise just how much, but i dont think you understand.
and i'm sorry to have scared you so badly. i never meant to do that, i just didnt know how to stop...the tears just kept coming, and i was totally out of control...everything just got too much for me. and im sorry you were frightened for me, and scared to leave me alone. truly.

it's just...i love you, and im sorry to hurt you. but right now i'm so fragile and i can't help it x

black_23 · Post by **black_23** » Sun Jun 04, 2006 3:24 pm

(Lang-sorry)

You go to work, come back and fcuk off again why why why what have I done thats so bad? You wont even say sorry for yesterday, told me to go away and deal with the big things then come back to you. Well screw that. Where's all the support gone, you look surprised if i ask for your opinion, we're meant to be a couple and we act so separate from each other it hurts. You been so great for ages I thought we were getting back on track and now you've thrown it back at me when Im most scared and vulneable. I don't understnd you.

~starblaze~ · Post by **~starblaze~** » Sun Jun 04, 2006 6:51 pm

- These are the times
Let's make the best out of our lives
Even if hope was shattered
I know it wouldn't matter
Cause these are the moments
These are the times
Let's make the best out of our lives

Quiet little Angel · Post by **Quiet little Angel** » Mon Jun 05, 2006 8:43 am

i'm not going anywhere with you... you can take that fucking boyfriend of yours and see if he'll go with you... cause i wont... i just wont... you're taking too much, and i have nothing more to give you... find someone else to suck the life out of... and now that i'm at it... how dare you not return my calls... how dare you ask me if you can crash at my place, and then not call me as you promised, so that i'll spend all night wondering if you'll call me to say you're coming? what good did that do you?

i can't begin to say how much i hate you right now... and it's only because you hurt me... deep down i love you... but right now... i'm so hurt i can't seem to see the good in life... and i can only blame you... i'm done blaming myself!

~starblaze~ · Post by **~starblaze~** » Mon Jun 05, 2006 11:04 am

- grrrr its frustrating you havent paid it, i need to use my phone

Please pay it today.

Callisto · Post by **Callisto** » Mon Jun 05, 2006 11:52 am

M:

I actually think that I might hate you. You treat me like child, but not just a child and incompetent stupid child at that. Even when we were up in Glasgow you treated me that way by telling me what dresses to try on without even asking me if I wanted to. What made trying on clothes even worse was the fact that you called me fat too (even though you can hardly talk). That made me feel even more like shit.

Either stop treating me like a child and stop ignoring the fact that he is a part of my life or just leave me alone.

All you ever do is make me feel like shit.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

D:

I'm glad you finally opened up to me a bit. And even though part of me knew some of what you were going to say deep down, it was still better to hear it from you and have you tell me. I'm sorry if you felt like I was pushing a bit too hard, but sometimes in life the only way we can start to get over things is if someone is willing to push us.

There was one thing that stuck with, that scares me. That was what you said about E and the fact that you always pictured being with her in the end. The fact that you've told me before that you've always fancied her. The fact that you told me that she said to you only last week that she's always fancied you but knows not to try anything because you're with someone else. And mostly the fact that you said you have love for but that you aren't sure if you're in love with her.

I'm scared. I'm scared that you don't really want me or that if we stay together, one day you'll dump me for her. I couldn't take that. I'm also scared that I'm holding you back somehow by making you feel obligated to stay with me even though you really want her. I don't think I can stay with you knowing that you really want her. Even though its only 36hours since you told me all this, I've spent most of that time wondering how many times in our relationship you've been thinking about her instead of me and how many times you've wished I was her.

I don't know what to think or do about this.

Forget Me · Post by **Forget Me** » Mon Jun 05, 2006 12:00 pm

z - m & j had sex and it freaks me out, but i can get over that. what i really want to say is that im jealous.

Koru · Post by **Koru** » Mon Jun 05, 2006 7:01 pm

M - why aren't I good enough for you? what makes me 'not girlfriend material'. Am I not clever enough, or interesting enough, or pretty enough, or fit enough? I try, I really do.
Or is it that my family background isn't good enough? That I can't change and wouldn't wish too, not for you or for anyone.

I was good enough to take to bed but not good enough for the daytime have you any idea how much that hurts??

_MessedUp_ · Post by **_MessedUp_** » Mon Jun 05, 2006 8:32 pm

A- I'm sorry for all of this. You try again and again to help me, and it seems i never take notice,but i need you to know i do. I'm so sorry for the things i have done, the things i've said. You have had to talk me out of the worse on more than one occasion and i cannot thank-you enough for that. You've always been there when i have needed you, and most importtantly you have never given up on me. I respect you so much for that. In your position i'm not sure i could do the same. You are the most amazing person i have ever met and everyday i am thankful for your being a part of my life. I'm sorry for makiing excuses, there are things tha tneed to change, and one day i will change them. I ust need to you to stand by me a while longer whilst i get myself better. I love you A, and i always will. Your my bf and my bestest friend. Thank-you.

Gan-Gan-I know you may never see this. You're in heaven now, but i need you to know that i love you very much, and i miss you everyday. I'm so sorry i never said good-bye. I was too scared to. II know it was in 2001 that you left us, but it still feels like yesterday. I'm sorry that i cried at your funeral. I had tried to be so long for everyone else, but seeing you then, knowing it was real broke my heart. I'm sorry if i wasn't dstrong enough. I promise to look after mum and dad and the brats. And i'll look after nan and B too. You were my pillar of strength and the nearest thng i had to a real dad (aside from M obviously

) I will never forget you, you were a remarable man, a loving father and husband, a great friend, and the best grandad ever. I love you. Please be in peace.

M&D- i have put you thugh so much in the last few years. the OD, the SI, you stood by me, and i know that must have been so hard for you. I'm so sorry if i have failed you by being weak. Uni worked out to be more stressful than i thought. I have had a lot of low points but the thought of you keeps me going. I just want you to be proud of me. i know you love me, but i fel i have let you down so many times before, and i need to make up for that.I promise to try my hardest, and try to stay string though the hard times. I love you (and my brats) and i promise i will never leave you.

bexy · Post by **bexy** » Mon Jun 05, 2006 11:56 pm

S - I'm sorry. I would be more supportive, but a tiny part of me wants to hate you for it. I'm jealous because you survived and you've come out completely unscathed. You're so happy, you have so many friends, you've got everything I want right now. And you're saying you wouldn't change a moment of it and i want to ask if maybe you'd change what happened with me.

barnabygirl · Post by **barnabygirl** » Tue Jun 06, 2006 12:42 am

I understand why you keep that distance.. and in a way it makes me feel safe.. but you saying it makes me feel sorta closed out,,, it makes me feel as you are affraid to love me.. incase you loose me, or incase i reject you,, ,, or you think i am to much of a hassle to put feelings into,,

right now i feel as if i dont fit into ur job or into ur life,, a part of me hates you now, and a part of me loves you..
a part of me depend on you.. a part of me wants to stay far away

i dont know how i can trust you right now,,,

bexy · Post by **bexy** » Tue Jun 06, 2006 1:25 am

you hurt me tonight. but at the same time i enjoyed myself because before that it felt like everything was back to how it was before.

~starblaze~ · Post by **~starblaze~** » Tue Jun 06, 2006 10:13 am

- its quite funny really how i know that every time i see you log on, and i change from appearing offline, that you will log off. Did you know i call you my old best friend now? i wouldnt even call you a friend of mine still and id be lying if i said it didnt hurt.

_MessedUp_ · Post by **_MessedUp_** » Tue Jun 06, 2006 5:37 pm

- i can't forgive you for the way you made me feel. i will never forgive you for how you shouted at me, how you tried to blame M, how you lied about everything. you are not a good father. and i can't pretend to be ok anymore. this is is, i dont want you to be a part of my life anymore

Quiet little Angel · Post by **Quiet little Angel** » Tue Jun 06, 2006 6:02 pm

i was so close to telling you yesterday... but i didn't... i cut instead... what would you say if you knew? would you scream or cry... would you even care?

btw i think you should tell him... keeping him in the dark is only going to hurt him even more... you know i adore you... but he's a friend and a very dear one at that... how do you expect me to keep up this pretend? i can't and wont lie to him... so i suggest you tell him before i do... cause i will... i wont see him hurt again... not like this...

sorry...

whypie · Post by **whypie** » Tue Jun 06, 2006 9:05 pm

I can't believe how fucking stupid I'm being. All the time I thought it was me but it's her. Probably because it's fine now. I should have known this wasn't really happening.

(*Haven*) · Post by **(*Haven*)** » Tue Jun 06, 2006 11:05 pm

H~I'm scared about telling you the "things" on Friday....

bexy · Post by **bexy** » Wed Jun 07, 2006 12:01 am

i miss you. i miss how things used to be

Scatterbrain · Post by **Scatterbrain** » Wed Jun 07, 2006 1:53 am

J~ OMG. I cant believe that you just told me you are a lesbian. It isnt an issue for me, and I'm glad that you felt you could tell me. Thanks for listening when I mentioned SI. I cant believe that you knew... Actually, looking back it makes sense that you know considering your mom is a therapist... Thanks for being cool with it. I know that you werent happy to hear that I'm not getting help, but thanks for not pressing the issue, at least right now. I love you and am always here if you need to talk. We have a lot more in common than you realize, in terms of family and other issues we face...

Quiet little Angel · Post by **Quiet little Angel** » Wed Jun 07, 2006 11:04 am

thank you... i'm glad i have your permission to tell him... deep down, you know, i really do love him...

bus

Things Left Unsaid - Version 3.0 Language

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