Before *ed not si

[red umbrellas]

how will this situation or feeling change if i binge?
it probably won't really....i'll still feel the same but with the added guilt of having eaten things i shouldn't.


what will bingeing bring to the situation? what will it take away from the situation?
it'll bring short term comfort, and something else to focus on in the short term. in the long term, i will feel guilt, and disapoointment in myself for not being stronger.
it will temporarily take away feelings of loneliness. but it will also take away any feeling of control over my own actions.

how do i want to feel about this in the long run? is bingeing likely to get me closer to or farther from feeling that way?
I want to feel strong enough to have got through this week without resorting to unhealthy coping mechanisms. I need to prove this to myself and someone else. Bingeing will probably take me further from that.


if eating seems like my best option right now, how long will the relief it brings last? what will i do then?
Probably only as long as I'm actually eating. Then I'll be at a loss.


what is something i could do now instead of binge eating? how will it change the situation i'm in? how long will that change last, and what will i do then?
Write about it. Go and talk to someone. Call someone. Won't last for a long period, but I will feel stronger, possibly for long enough for it to be time for me to go to bed.


how will i feel tomorrow if i overeat? how will i feel tomorrow if i do the other thing i came up with?
I will probably have nightmares because there will be too much for me to digest. I might feel queasy and bloated. I won't have the satisfaction of having conquered my cravings.
Tomorrow....I know the same will come up. And I have to keep struggling on. I also have a small, fun project which I can start work on to distract me.



I think I can be strong enough....I'm gonna try. Cos in the long one, food won't change the situation. And I've done ok-ish today.

[tattybluetrees]

Hello my dear. Sorry for not having spoken to you for ages. I've been pretty awol.

how will this situation or feeling change if i binge?
it probably won't really....i'll still feel the same but with the added guilt of having eaten things i shouldn't.

Given that you think it wont change, can you try and work out why you want it and why you don't? If nothing changes after you do this, why is it good foor you? What needs is it fulfilling?

what will bingeing bring to the situation? what will it take away from the situation?
it'll bring short term comfort, and something else to focus on in the short term. in the long term, i will feel guilt, and disapoointment in myself for not being stronger.
it will temporarily take away feelings of loneliness. but it will also take away any feeling of control over my own actions.

So it sounds like the things you need to deal with are the short term lack of comfort and feeling lonely. It's really easier said than done to deal with things like that except trhough established mechanisms, but is there anything else you can think of that could woork? If you just focus on those two things, what could help you?

I think it's interesting that you feel doig this will take aay feelings of control, and really good that you realise that.

[quote="glitterflower']how do i want to feel about this in the long run? is bingeing likely to get me closer to or farther from feeling that way?
I want to feel strong enough to have got through this week without resorting to unhealthy coping mechanisms. I need to prove this to myself and someone else. Bingeing will probably take me further from that.[/quote]

Proof is something I really struggle with. I really have problems with the fact that if I don't SI or whatever no one will know what is going on in my head. I need a way to prove to people that this WERE this bad and that I survived them anyway. Is there any other way you can think of to

to prove it to yourself? Is there any way you caan think of that would mark to you what you have felt?

what is something i could do now instead of binge eating? how will it change the situation i'm in? how long will that change last, and what will i do then?
Write about it. Go and talk to someone. Call someone. Won't last for a long period, but I will feel stronger, possibly for long enough for it to be time for me to go to bed.

I had aa really wierd concersation with someone recently where I said "I have to do it because I have to go to sleep" aand she said "what happens if you just go to sleep?" I couldn't answer the question. I think it's got something to do with having to have a marker or recognistion, but anyway it was a question which threw me immensely. I just thought it might be something to think about.


Hope some of what I said is okay. Take care of yourself.

Tatty