Secrets(inspired by PostSecret)-Please Stay Safe!
- flipflopfetish
- awe-inspiring
- Posts: 6119
- Joined: Sat Nov 12, 2005 3:49 am
- Location: People's Republic of Berzerkley
- Contact:
My friend's friend attempted suicide yesterday and is at the hospital.
I'm mad at her because I've seen how bad my friend is feeling and I wouldn't want to wish that on anyone.
But that's not even the worst thing (because I don't truly believe anyone would care that much about me)
I'm second best now. So what if I SI? She's tried to kill herself and besides, she has more problems than me (and yes, that is how my friend would react). And anyways, if I killed myself I'd be the second person to try, not the first. It's embarassing and I don't like admitting in
And I don't even know this girl
I'm mad at her because I've seen how bad my friend is feeling and I wouldn't want to wish that on anyone.
But that's not even the worst thing (because I don't truly believe anyone would care that much about me)
I'm second best now. So what if I SI? She's tried to kill herself and besides, she has more problems than me (and yes, that is how my friend would react). And anyways, if I killed myself I'd be the second person to try, not the first. It's embarassing and I don't like admitting in
And I don't even know this girl
- Place -- please visit me!<br>
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"I'm just a little bit heiress, a little bit Irish"~ Rufus Wainwright
art by P!nk Elephant
zombie emily
- _MessedUp_
- meeting the neighbors
- Posts: 410
- Joined: Thu Dec 09, 2004 3:20 pm
Comments Ok-PM
I play sad songs to make myself cry
I drink to forget, but deny that
I smoke, and have done since december last year (may not seem much of a secret-but i hide it from everyone including my bf and family)
i'm jealous of the fact that lifewise my boyfriend has been through so many bad things, yet has come out a stronger person thatn i can ever be
OD Trig
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I wish i'd never taken the OD, cos i can never forget the look in my mum's eyes when i told her. I hurt her so much and i could see that in her eyes. That look, that memory will haunt me forever
I play sad songs to make myself cry
I drink to forget, but deny that
I smoke, and have done since december last year (may not seem much of a secret-but i hide it from everyone including my bf and family)
i'm jealous of the fact that lifewise my boyfriend has been through so many bad things, yet has come out a stronger person thatn i can ever be
OD Trig
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I wish i'd never taken the OD, cos i can never forget the look in my mum's eyes when i told her. I hurt her so much and i could see that in her eyes. That look, that memory will haunt me forever
"Life is like a beautiful melody only the lyrics are messed up"
My Place
<a href='http://www.livejournal.com/users/_messedup_/'>My LiveJournal</a>:redstar:
my cow
days SI free
My Place
<a href='http://www.livejournal.com/users/_messedup_/'>My LiveJournal</a>:redstar:
my cow
days SI free
Im hurt that i havent been included. It makes me sad to know that ill be the only one that doesnt get a special big thing for them made on my birthday like everyone else has got. I try to pretend it doesnt affect me and i wont be bothered by it...but i know i will be if come my birthday no one has done anything like they have this year for people's 18ths which i know they wont
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- building community
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- Gender: f
- Location: washington dc
- Contact:
- DecemberLivy
- just plain inspiring
- Posts: 7474
- Joined: Tue Sep 21, 2004 10:38 am
- Location: London
i'm jealous of her
<center>my walpole cafe
"My life's a mess"
"That's the way it's supposed to be" - soap -
</center>
I think I'll paint roads
on my front room walls
to convince myself
that I'm going places.
"My life's a mess"
"That's the way it's supposed to be" - soap -
</center>
I think I'll paint roads
on my front room walls
to convince myself
that I'm going places.
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- unpacking boxes
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- Contact:
comments are okay go ahead and pm me
***MAY SI/SU TRIG***
-i told my sister i stopped siing but really i went deeper
-i hate myself for being such a loser
-i feel like nobody wants me around
-i have no friends
-i want to die
-i love him but im afraid he'll never accept me for who i am
-i'm afraid that my parents will send me away if they find out i si
***MAY SI/SU TRIG***
-i told my sister i stopped siing but really i went deeper
-i hate myself for being such a loser
-i feel like nobody wants me around
-i have no friends
-i want to die
-i love him but im afraid he'll never accept me for who i am
-i'm afraid that my parents will send me away if they find out i si
Gotta love guys with eyeliner!!
- ioa
- creating your space
- Posts: 160
- Joined: Thu Jan 08, 2004 12:42 am
- Location: Louisiana, United States
- Contact:
* triggers/si/su*
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I've successfully decieved my therapist into thinking I'm OK - that I don't SI or even think about it anymore.
I think about killing myself at least once everyday.
I am 18 years old and have never kissed a boy. Mostly because I'm afraid to admit to myself that I'm a lesbian.
No one knows I had a lesbian relationship for 6 months with a schoolmate when I was 13, and I hate myself for ruining it.
I'm a senior in high school and I spend most of my weekends alone. Not out of choice, simply because of my lack of friends.
I honestly believe the only way I will ever get better would be to be hospitalized for an extended period of time - and that scares me to death.
I have no idea where my life is going.
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I've successfully decieved my therapist into thinking I'm OK - that I don't SI or even think about it anymore.
I think about killing myself at least once everyday.
I am 18 years old and have never kissed a boy. Mostly because I'm afraid to admit to myself that I'm a lesbian.
No one knows I had a lesbian relationship for 6 months with a schoolmate when I was 13, and I hate myself for ruining it.
I'm a senior in high school and I spend most of my weekends alone. Not out of choice, simply because of my lack of friends.
I honestly believe the only way I will ever get better would be to be hospitalized for an extended period of time - and that scares me to death.
I have no idea where my life is going.
- mephistopheles
- cow control
- Posts: 24355
- Joined: Thu May 26, 2005 4:40 pm
- Location: London
comments ok.
I think the voice that screams in my head is me. But I can't remember what is was that made me scream like that.
I think I'm anorexic. But if I tell anyone I'll have to stop.
I wish my Mother was dead instead of Eva and Alexei.
I don't want to know what happened to me that makes me dissociate at least once a day.
I think the voice that screams in my head is me. But I can't remember what is was that made me scream like that.
I think I'm anorexic. But if I tell anyone I'll have to stop.
I wish my Mother was dead instead of Eva and Alexei.
I don't want to know what happened to me that makes me dissociate at least once a day.
- BlackKat13
- sprouting branches
- Posts: 1147
- Joined: Tue Aug 13, 2002 3:32 am
- Contact:
PM comments fine
I have been single every valentines day my entire life. So on this day, I buy chocolates, and roses for my single friends. I even buy pink roses to give to single girls I meet that I don't know....I just want them to feel special.
But, there is no one to make me feel special.
I just wish I had someone to buy me flowers...
I have been single every valentines day my entire life. So on this day, I buy chocolates, and roses for my single friends. I even buy pink roses to give to single girls I meet that I don't know....I just want them to feel special.
But, there is no one to make me feel special.
I just wish I had someone to buy me flowers...
Wounded and empowered
I gaze to the sky
And say beneath my breath
"Never injure what cannot die."
I gaze to the sky
And say beneath my breath
"Never injure what cannot die."
- _MessedUp_
- meeting the neighbors
- Posts: 410
- Joined: Thu Dec 09, 2004 3:20 pm
PM'S ok
I'm sat in a computer room surrounded by stangers. I have tears in my eyes. But i know i can't let them see me cry.
PM'S OK
I'm sat in a computer room surrounded by stangers. I have tears in my eyes. But i know i can't let them see me cry.
PM'S OK
"Life is like a beautiful melody only the lyrics are messed up"
My Place
<a href='http://www.livejournal.com/users/_messedup_/'>My LiveJournal</a>:redstar:
my cow
days SI free
My Place
<a href='http://www.livejournal.com/users/_messedup_/'>My LiveJournal</a>:redstar:
my cow
days SI free
- marshmallowfluff
- forum moderator emeritus
- Posts: 16914
- Joined: Tue Aug 16, 2005 11:52 pm
- Gender: Female
- Location: South Yorkshire, UK Age: 26
- red umbrellas
- beyond inspiring
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- Joined: Mon Mar 01, 2004 8:50 am
- Location: Sydney
i don't know if it's really what i want
and i'm fucking terrified of what the consequences might be.
and i'm just confused about everything.
and i'm fucking terrified of what the consequences might be.
and i'm just confused about everything.
And excuses and excuses and excuses
Hold On To Yourself - Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds
"We paint a picture of a scenario - and then we become afraid of it" - Andrea Fella
- jaded melody
- forum moderator emeritus
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- Gender: Cis Woman
- Location: London
now that she's gone, i think im going to die.
Im so ashamed of how dependant i am on her
and if i dont take my own life, ana might.
I love it when people hold my waist or hips because they always say how thin i am.
I went a year cut-free. Now i cant sleep until I've hurt myself.
And i have no help any more. I want nothing more than to run to the clinic and cry and tell her how awful things are.
People keep saying it'll get better but it hurts all the time. I dont think i can cope or stay alive any more.
I dont think i could get help from anyone but her. I want her back so much it makes me want to cry every second of the day.
And i just want to die.
I WISH I had been completely starving myself but im not doing well enough and im no longer satisfied unless i eat nothing. Actually, nothing is still too much.
Part of me wants this to kill me.
And nobody cares any more.
(PMs fine)
Im so ashamed of how dependant i am on her
and if i dont take my own life, ana might.
I love it when people hold my waist or hips because they always say how thin i am.
I went a year cut-free. Now i cant sleep until I've hurt myself.
And i have no help any more. I want nothing more than to run to the clinic and cry and tell her how awful things are.
People keep saying it'll get better but it hurts all the time. I dont think i can cope or stay alive any more.
I dont think i could get help from anyone but her. I want her back so much it makes me want to cry every second of the day.
And i just want to die.
I WISH I had been completely starving myself but im not doing well enough and im no longer satisfied unless i eat nothing. Actually, nothing is still too much.
Part of me wants this to kill me.
And nobody cares any more.
(PMs fine)
"Between two worlds life hovers like a star,
twixt night and morn, upon the horizon's verge."
- Lord Byron
twixt night and morn, upon the horizon's verge."
- Lord Byron
- silenceBROKEN
- awe-inspiring
- Posts: 6860
- Joined: Sat Oct 30, 2004 5:49 pm
- Location: Pennsylvania, USA
PMs are fine.
I claim to value honesty, but I continue to lie to myself.
I wish I had the strength to end my life, for living it isn't seeming to get me anywhere.
When I was younger, I used to flush the toiler when my dad was in the shower. I hoped that I would burn him so bad that he couldn't hurt me anymore.
A couple of months ago, I did actually believe that the abuse wasn't my fault. Now, I'm back to blaming myself.
I can't stand it when others judge people. I hate being judged because of my sexual orientation. And yet, I'm slightly racist.
A part of me enjoyed the abuse.
A classmate of mine passed away in a car crash earlier this year. I cried the entire day at school. What people don't know though is that I cried because I wasn't the one who died.
I claim to value honesty, but I continue to lie to myself.
I wish I had the strength to end my life, for living it isn't seeming to get me anywhere.
When I was younger, I used to flush the toiler when my dad was in the shower. I hoped that I would burn him so bad that he couldn't hurt me anymore.
A couple of months ago, I did actually believe that the abuse wasn't my fault. Now, I'm back to blaming myself.
I can't stand it when others judge people. I hate being judged because of my sexual orientation. And yet, I'm slightly racist.
A part of me enjoyed the abuse.
A classmate of mine passed away in a car crash earlier this year. I cried the entire day at school. What people don't know though is that I cried because I wasn't the one who died.
I want life in every word to the extent that it's absurd.
SI FREE SINCE FEBRUARY 27, 2008.
one slip in November 1010.
SI FREE SINCE FEBRUARY 27, 2008.
one slip in November 1010.
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