new and struggling

Jen · Post by **Jen** » Mon Jan 16, 2006 5:01 am

Hi everyone, this is my first post here, but I was a member of the BUS e-mail list some years ago. I am 28 years old and I slipped back into SI in october after stopping for nearly seven years. I was inpatient for psych issues, depression and SI, over Christmas and have been out two weeks tomorrow.
Both my therapist and my medical doctor have put limits on me, saying they will not see me if I hurt myself or end up in the hospital. I know they obviously want the best for me, but I also feel I need my vices, badly.
Over the past three days, it has come to light that the move I was planning may not happen due to differences in medical coverages in the two states. For this, I feel like a huge huge failure. My anxiety has spiked way up and I want to cut sooooo much. I can't though, because Jen has to be perfect now.
Is it possible to have withdrawals from cutting, because as I sit here writing this, I feel like there are bugs crawling all over my skin. I want to cut, but I can't. I'm sorry for being a bother.
Jen

balletomane · Post by **balletomane** » Mon Jan 16, 2006 5:38 am

You are not being a bother at all.

Welcome to bus. I'm sorry things are so tough at the moment. I don't really have any constructive advice, but I wanted to let you know that I read.

Also, do you like the doctors you are working with? If not, can you work with someone else? I think I would find that kind of agreement really stressful.

Anyhow, take care.

guest1 · Post by **guest1** » Mon Jan 16, 2006 5:44 am

yes - you can have withdrawals from cutting. It can be like an addiction and what you are feeling is real. I know - I went through it where I wanted to SI just because it was calling me. I also went through drug (illegal) withdrawals years ago - and there wasn't much difference. I have been drug free for years now.

You are no bother - you can pm me if you want to talk about it more.

hang in there

*sending strength*
.

collide · Post by **collide** » Mon Jan 16, 2006 7:59 am

hey jen

welcome....and not much to say but sorry u are having a rough time with SI/hospitalization...and slipping...i wish i could help u but all i can say that those doctors are cruel to say that to u...i mean, i have BPD and DEPRESSION and i know what it's like to SI...on top of having to deal with BPD issues...and a lot of psychiatrists and therapists have dumped me and hurt me even more...

i wish those doctors can see that your SI is part of your BPD and taht you are/were getting better and that u slipped....hopefully they will realize that...if not i hope u can find better doctors and therpists that will be able to treat u without those STUPID THREATS...

viewtopic.php?t=89417 (my POETRY)
viewtopic.php?t=88288&start=420 (my PLACE)

collide

disastercake · Post by **disastercake** » Mon Jan 16, 2006 9:15 pm

I don't really have a lot of advice for you, and I've never quit for even a year, 7 is great! And the feelings you've described are ones I've had myself, and I do think it's possible to have withdrawls from cutting.

I wish you all the best

new and struggling

new and struggling

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