Do these boards help or trigger?

kickingmyself · Post by **kickingmyself** » Sun Oct 16, 2005 9:41 am

Hi - I wandered in here yesterday because SH has been on my mind for a while, wanted to see what other people said but remain anonymous. Some of it I find really helpful (the idea of drawing on yourself in red marker pen is great!), but I have to admit that when I start empathizing with some of the posts it's actually creating the urges.

I have quite an obsessive personality (I get obsessed with lovers/CSI/fruit teas/shoes etc) and I think maybe these boards are my latest obsession! Does anyone else find that they're going round in circles when they're looking at them?

Forget Me · Post by **Forget Me** » Sun Oct 16, 2005 9:46 am

sometimes, yes.
these boards are definitely the kind of thing that can be more harmful than helpful for some people.
when i first came here i went through a phase of being a bit worse than i usually was, it may or may not have been related to the board though.
after a while, i levelled out though and now i find BUS extremely helpful and supporting.
if you think BUS isnt good for you, maybe it isnt such a good idea to be here

its up to you.
welcome, though!

onlypurples · Post by **onlypurples** » Sun Oct 16, 2005 2:21 pm

I have to be aware of my limits on the boards and I have to remember the limits of these boards. The boards are posted mainly my fellow survivors and not professionals, however they are monitored.

BUS can either trigger me or help me, depending on what I allow the boards to do. I have to be careful and not read certain things or reply back to certain things because it will only upset me and not help me.

I cannot take responsibility for anything that is posted on these boards but what I post myself. I am very careful what I contribute and I'm very careful about what I chose to read and engage in. I can allow myself to come on here and get triggered and sometimes I get triggered on accident. I know all of these risks before I come on BUS and I weigh these risks carefully.

BUS is incredibly helpful to some people and for others, it only makes their situations worse. It is up to you to decide. Take it at your own pace and you can find your place here.

dbms · Post by **dbms** » Sun Oct 16, 2005 2:42 pm

The board does both IMHO. I have to be careful what I read and my state of mind when I'm reading. I've felt the same urges your describe reading some posts. However, no matter what I read I know I'm the one choosing to SI. Most likely I would SI whether I read or didn't read something on this board.

I'm new here but it seems a comfortable place to be. It's a selfish reason I come here make no mistake. I hope that by coming I learn to want not to SI and to learn more ways of coping with the urges. I understand the board is compelling. I have trouble staying off but it's new and I know I will find a way to build into my life so it's not overshadowing the other things I need to be doing.

Seeing how others who have come before me are dealing with life helps me to gain perspective and shine a light in some very dark corners of my existance. It gives me the opportunity to show some support for people who are also walking in my shoes and need help just as much as I do.

Cheers

marshmallowfluff · Post by **marshmallowfluff** » Sun Oct 16, 2005 3:57 pm

Heyy

Most of the triggering threads on BUS are marked, however some can be triggering without actually meaning to be triggering. BUS used to trigger me ALOT, and it sitll does sometimes, but not as much. On the otehr hand, it helps to beable to talk when im feeling crap or whatever, and when i am feeling triggery, i always find it helpful to post in before and after and that usually helps untrigger me. (sorry about the overuse of the word trigger haha

)

Take care x

Green Beauty · Post by **Green Beauty** » Sun Oct 16, 2005 9:21 pm

I would have to say the boards help far more then they trigger. But sometimes some posts do have the opposite effect, and i do have to occasionaly take a day or two away from here. You just have to be aware of your limits, and the triggers that are put on posts help you to stay as safe as possible.

Alex

kickingmyself · Post by **kickingmyself** » Mon Oct 17, 2005 8:59 am

Cheers everyone for your input. I think partly the issue is that here on these boards we "belong", other people understand us because they're going through very similar things to what we are. But does it follow then that if we stopped we wouldn't feel that we belonged anymore?

I don't know, ramblings of an unbalanced girl!! Going to have to think about whether I should come here or not

DJ_CJ · Post by **DJ_CJ** » Mon Oct 17, 2005 10:06 am

It doesn't matter to what degree you SI, if you seek refuge here YOU BELONG HERE. Everyone's advice and support is welcome and valued whether they SIed last year or this morning. Hard times are not easily forgoten and the lessons stay with you forever.

kickingmyself · Post by **kickingmyself** » Mon Oct 24, 2005 8:52 pm

Just in case anyone was wondering, I've made the decision only to come onto these boards when I am feeling ok and am able to make rational decisions, I've worked out that if I'm emotional or down then they're not a good thing for me. Also, when I feel like that all I do is go on about myself, whereas when I'm feeling ok I can make constructive and hopefully helpful comments that might help other people (maybe!).

Right now I feel amazing as I have just done some yoga by candlelight, whilst listening to Tibetan chanting. Feel cleansed, you should all try it.

dbms · Post by **dbms** » Tue Oct 25, 2005 5:32 pm

Good for you. Sounds like you have a good plan that will work for you. I do hope to see you on the board from time to to time but understand completely that sometimes it is too much. Glad your feeling well.

SpecialBlend · Post by **SpecialBlend** » Tue Oct 25, 2005 6:41 pm

I really like the board because it gives me aplace to vent out my thoughts and feelings about SI and SU without scaring or worrying the people around me. The people here give me support and make me feel safe and loved. And for the most part thats all i need when i am triggery. When my lifelines arnt around (they never are anymore) I turn to the boards for help.

kickingmyself · Post by **kickingmyself** » Tue Oct 25, 2005 7:08 pm

dbms wrote:Good for you. Sounds like you have a good plan that will work for you. I do hope to see you on the board from time to to time but understand completely that sometimes it is too much. Glad your feeling well.

Cheers! I do realise however that this means I am going to be one of those annoyingly chirpy people everytime I'm on this board, since I have to stay away when feeling low, so apologies to everyone in advance if I get on your nerves.

Right, I'm off to see an 80s style electropop band, very excited! Live music is the ultimate antidote to SI impulses.

Post by **sine nomine** » Tue Nov 01, 2005 1:22 am

if you stop, you can stick around and help the people who haven't yet. i've been doing that for a long time. it feels good.

deb

toXic · Post by **toXic** » Tue Nov 01, 2005 4:36 pm

for me it seems to be more helpful than harmful... there are times where it does make me feel a little down, and if thats the case i'll just log off and go do something else...

the thing i like the most is that it's a place where i'm not afraid to talk about my problems, because i know there are others going through the same things as me.

Smeagol · Post by **Smeagol** » Tue Nov 01, 2005 7:10 pm

Finding a community is important. Maybe the trick is to find one which is making progress so you belong there, and as you find it easier to stop to move over to "life after" and join the community there. that way your community can be the people who have stopped but hang around to help.

HakunaMatata · Post by **HakunaMatata** » Tue Nov 01, 2005 9:47 pm

I definitley have to make sure I'm in a positive enough mood to log on, and stop myself from reading posts that are triggered- as they do 'trigger' me. However I find people on this site friendly and easy to talk to- and it's so nice to know I'm not alone with self-harm. R-Q.xXx.

kickingmyself · Post by **kickingmyself** » Wed Nov 02, 2005 11:26 pm

You're all fab x

kelly_girl · Post by **kelly_girl** » Thu Nov 03, 2005 4:44 am

I find alot of things very triggering..but its a helpfull community and I need somewhere to talk where I won't feel judged.

_MessedUp_ · Post by **_MessedUp_** » Wed Nov 16, 2005 2:07 pm

kickingmyself wrote:Hi - I wandered in here yesterday because SH has been on my mind for a while, wanted to see what other people said but remain anonymous. Some of it I find really helpful (the idea of drawing on yourself in red marker pen is great!), but I have to admit that when I start empathizing with some of the posts it's actually creating the urges.

I have quite an obsessive personality (I get obsessed with lovers/CSI/fruit teas/shoes etc) and I think maybe these boards are my latest obsession! Does anyone else find that they're going round in circles when they're looking at them?

i don't find it triggering when i'm already down. if i'm not down/SI'ing then i don't come on BUS as i possibly would be triggered. However in time of ned i come here cos its the only place i can turn where others understand what i've done and why i've done it.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Mon Dec 19, 2005 6:15 am

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Do these boards help or trigger?

Do these boards help or trigger?

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