dissasociated. help?

[heartonmysleave]

I've just gone through something very upsetting. the situation is a little complicated. so I won't even start trying to explain.

but I should be devistated.

but I'm not. just numb. it's like I'm sleep walking. nothing touches me. I can fake all the pretences of emotion. but it's like I'm not even really here.
I don't even want to cut.

I dont want to do anything. I'm just cold.

I want to break this feeling. but I also don't want to. because it would mean feeling all the bad stuff I don't want to.

I don't know what to do.

any advice?

[strmdncr]

I wanted to let you know I read your post. Is there a place you feel safe being in, or people you feel safe being around so that you can let yourself begin to feel....as much as it will hurt to do so? I know that sometimes it's easier to stay away from it all, and maybe for a while that is what you need to do right now just in order to take care of you. If it seems to be lasting for any extended period of time, there might be more things you could do, but it sounds like your possibly at this time doing what you need to do to take care of yourself in a manner of speaking. I hope everything works out for the best for you.

[Licentia Poetica]

It does sound like dissociation.

You need to ground yourself. Focus on the moment. Smell around you, sounds, concentrate on how the floor feels beneath your feet, how the room looks around you.

Make a list of things in the room. Or a list of things you plan to do in the next few weeks.

I often find it helps to listen to some familiar music, or to read a simplistic book that you've read a hundred times. Call someone and just talk about things that are happening. Even the weather.

If you're cold, wrap yourself in a blanket. Or go outside and run around a bit, then lie down and look at the sky.

Concentrate really hard on doing something simple. Like making noodles. Or hot chocolate.

Try to avoid staring at any kind of screen, I find that makes it worse.

[pretty]

This is a great thing I do, it's meant for dissociation, but I use it for more general calming. I read it on here somewhere, but my version might have been jumbled around by my brain. Anyway, it went something like this;

Name five things you can see.
Name four things you can fee.l (like the ground under your feet, the chair under your legs, your tshirt on your skin etc.)
Name three things you can hear.
Name two things you can smell. (or like the smell of, cos you can't always smell two things.)
Name one good thing about yourself. (even something so simple as "I'm trying this exercise").

You can write out your answers, or just do it in your head. I find it really helps me to have a structured way of making myself aware of my surroundings.