Kaelyns+Log

what_if · Post by **what_if** » Fri Sep 30, 2005 11:09 am

Congrats on getting the assignements done!

(And all the other positives are great too

)

Hehe i just noticed your busses had changed aswell! I was wondering whether they were pink before

Kaelyn · Post by **Kaelyn** » Sat Oct 01, 2005 11:41 pm

saturdays pozzies

sat opposite a mother with baby in the train... suddenly the baby looked at me and gave me the biggest smile i'd ever seen...like even his eyes were smiling.. wow.. it made me smile too. every time the baby looked towards me he started smiling again.. sooo cute

met up with a friend I hadn't seen in at least four or five months, and we walked (while talking) for 5 hours

felt really good.. tired now, but satisfied.

Kaelyn · Post by **Kaelyn** » Sun Oct 02, 2005 12:47 pm

sunday:

yay!! the sun is shining!!

going to eat "hutspot" with friends tonight

(hutspot is some weird dutch dish... cooked potatoes and carrots, mashed and mixed...

)

Lynn · Post by **Lynn** » Sun Oct 02, 2005 8:06 pm

Sun?? It was raining here!

I guess you're lucky.

I'm not so fond of hutspot myself, I do like zuurkool-stamppot (talking about dutch dishes)

I know a pozzie for this week:
- there won't be any rain!

Kaelyn · Post by **Kaelyn** » Sun Oct 02, 2005 8:26 pm

really, no rain the coming week??

thats good

didn't go to the hutspot-"appointment"... flu is bad..
but I've got another positive instead.

was very urgy today, but I managed to keep myself distracted by posting a lot on BUS.. so didn't cut.. which is good

Kaelyn · Post by **Kaelyn** » Mon Oct 03, 2005 9:44 pm

had fun on the zombie threads

took a walk, good for me. healthy. aaaah fresh air.

balletomane · Post by **balletomane** » Thu Oct 06, 2005 12:09 pm

This log makes me really happy.

Kaelyn · Post by **Kaelyn** » Sat Oct 08, 2005 9:27 pm

thank you B.. It makes me happy that it makes you happy

some positives for today:

went to an art fair... it was huuuge (500 artists!) but I picked up some great ideas I definately want to try

I feel like painting again... after months and months of feeling "bleh" (maybe its because the meds are starting to work, but either way - its good that I feel like I might enjoy painting again)

went out for dinner with mum/dad/sis and for once we were not arguing that much. I daresay it was enjoyable

amyfairy · Post by **amyfairy** » Sun Oct 09, 2005 1:22 pm

Kaelyn · Post by **Kaelyn** » Mon Oct 10, 2005 4:36 pm

I talked to myself yesterday (by replying to my own posts) and it was actually quite a relief... I mean, I told someone what was bothering me - but without having to worry about the response because that someone I told, was me. (does that make sense? probably not

)

Today I sat in the sun for a while and for a few minutes, I felt completely happy.

Lynn · Post by **Lynn** » Tue Oct 11, 2005 6:12 pm

Today was another sunny day

You know, my T gave me homework. I have to write down something positive I did every day. Reminds me of your log

Kaelyn · Post by **Kaelyn** » Wed Oct 12, 2005 8:47 am

hey Lina.. I just read your place.. you could make a log too

yesterday R hugged me... not once but twice (hence the two stars) and I didn't even have to ask for it.

Kaelyn · Post by **Kaelyn** » Thu Oct 13, 2005 12:22 pm

I felt really bad last night when talking to a friend, and then I fell silent... suddenly she came over and held me (like a hug, but different). It was really reassuring. (and again I didn't have to ask). It was a really good thing though I was having a sad moment.

Went to the movies with two friends and forgot what was bothering me for a while.

It is sunny weather today... and my cat decided to jump on my lap, so I could stroke him for 20 mins. (he never stays that long, normally)

Kaelyn · Post by **Kaelyn** » Fri Oct 14, 2005 4:14 pm

Today I got up and went to college. When I actually didn't feel like going.
I'm proud that I did go instead of giving in to my laziness.

Kaelyn · Post by **Kaelyn** » Mon Oct 17, 2005 2:30 pm

I opened up to a friend about recent thoughts (and planning) of SU. I was kinda scared about it, but she took it ok I guess. So I'm glad that I found the courage to do that.

Had a great weekend, went clubbing with some good friends. Oh and we watched "mr and mrs Smith"... really funny that one. I love my friends. And for one of them I have really deep respect.. and I'm more thankful for her being there than she'll ever realise.

Kaelyn · Post by **Kaelyn** » Sun Oct 23, 2005 7:38 pm

got a nice letter from a friend on wednesday. (people do actually care about me?

)

I did all the dishes this morning (and it was a lot!). yay! it proves that I can still be useful.

Lynn · Post by **Lynn** » Mon Oct 24, 2005 2:42 pm

Hi Anne, I just *had* to read your log because it always makes me feel better. *emotional sob*

It's really courageous that you could open up to a friend. I'm glad you did that.

Yes people care about you! I care too!

Kaelyn · Post by **Kaelyn** » Mon Oct 24, 2005 9:57 pm

went painting today.. and its almost finished.. hopefully I'll be able to finish it next time

I managed to scrape up enough courage and call the people of the daytime-treatment centre.
(I was soo scared of doing that.. but I did!! me=proud of myself

)

Kaelyn · Post by **Kaelyn** » Tue Oct 25, 2005 2:46 pm

-- copied from the "top 10 things you are glad you did" post on main --

I am glad that I:

Have friends that actually seem to care about me

Can paint and draw to express things

Got my bachelors degree with quite good grades

Can learn quite well

Have climbed mountains - now I know my limits

Live near the sea

Joined BUS (despite my T saying that I shouldn't

)

Have kept in contact with certain friends (after some quarrels)

Managed to ask for help (which is a difficult thing for me to do)

Found the courage to open up to my T (even though we don't always agree)

Kaelyn · Post by **Kaelyn** » Wed Oct 26, 2005 7:09 pm

todays pozzies:

I cleaned the living-room when I really didn't feel like doing it. That is good because it shows that I am able to do things that have to be done without too much problems.

I thought about asking R if she wanted to tell how she feels about what I told her last night. That is a good thing (to ask) because I am not being selfish then (I can listen to other people and how they feel too)

I came to an important insight today. (ah! that proves that my brain's still working!

)

I felt a bit better today. And despite having a lot of urges, I am now two days SI free

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