before.....

jamie28 · Post by **jamie28** » Mon Aug 15, 2005 3:53 am

i tried doing the before thing a few days ago.

many years ago i used something similar which a previous T had suggested with some limited success. now it just seems ridiculous and made me want to cut even more i don't know why.

anyone have any thoughts on this?

jamie

balletomane · Post by **balletomane** » Mon Aug 15, 2005 4:01 am

Do you find the questions too constraining? Or that they are irrelevant/avoid the real issues? Alternately, do you find that the questions make you focus on cutting rather than working on the feelings or situation?

Just a few ideas.

plantt · Post by **plantt** » Mon Aug 15, 2005 4:21 am

just because something has not worked in the past doesn't mean it won't now. things change.
also simply because something causes urges to increase doesn't necessarily mean it's not an effective thing.
really if i tried to avoid everything that might (or has) caused urges to increase in the past... not only would i be fragilizing myself i'd be really limiting the options i had in life.
i don't think the lists of questions as they're posted are necessarily helpful for everyone. honestly i don't use them as they're posted myself. that does not mean though that i don't think through urges or challenge myself when i do have urges. it just means that answering them in this setting as they're posted... i don't feel a need for.

jamie28 · Post by **jamie28** » Mon Aug 15, 2005 4:26 am

i think i figured it out.

they just seem childishly simple to me. feels like an insult to my intelligence. (which is not to say they may not be useful to someone else). whenever i feel that way my first reaction is to go do the opposite of whatever allowed those feelings to surface. (i hate to say "made me feel that way" because no one and nothing makes anyone feel or do anything.)

anyway, i don't think i will bother with them. thanks for the input!

jamie

plantt · Post by **plantt** » Mon Aug 15, 2005 4:30 am

if you said something 'made' you feel that way i'd question it anyhow

they can seem very simple. really though at least for me... it can be the really simple-sounding things that i discount thoughtlessly. it's not so much a 'hmm i tried & this seriously isn't something i find helpful' it's more a 'pshaw yeah whatEver

' which for me is something that can get me in trouble in & of itself

i at times make things harder. because of course... the more difficult something is... the more valid it is & obviously i need to do everything the hardest possible way

anyhow... i can see why they might not be helpful for you. i do hope though that you're willing to use them if you are looking for various options... & please don't feel that you *have* to answer them exactly as they're posted in order to use this forum...

pandablue · Post by **pandablue** » Tue Aug 16, 2005 2:19 am

Hey Jamie,
I agree with what Plantt said.

It seems if something is too simple it can't possibly work. It took me a while to actually post here.

when I did it helped me focus on where the urge was comming from and the feedback from others helped. It just helped to know someone cared and could relate. sometimes my head is so messed up all i can handle is simple.

I also get in the mood if you tell me not to do something it's the first thing i run to. Depends on my attitude at the time. SI and my need to get out of it has been quite humbling for me.

I hope you're doing ok and staying safe and can find something that helps

bus

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