i need advice! quick.

tips on how to cope: dealing with your feelings, dealing with the consequences of self-harm in your life. share your ideas and maybe pick up some new skills, too. you don't have to want to stop to learn something new here.

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everythingends666
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i need advice! quick.

Post by everythingends666 » Mon Aug 15, 2005 3:44 am

hey guys. youve always been so helpful so thanx a lot. :) ..anyways tho, one of my best friends and i made plans to go to 6 flags (an amusement park for those who havent heard of it) and she just decided to tell me that she invited one of her other best friends, shelby whom i cant stand. For my friends b-day i tolerated shelby and wen we went to the movies saturday. the problem is that last time we were all at 6 flags together, well i hate it wen shelbys around in the first place cuz its like were competing for my friends attention and she will even hang on to her arm which i think is all childish and stupid so i just dont like being near shelby at all (i dont really no shelby but ive heard nothing but bad things about her). so back on track last time wen we were at six flags together i started to feel super empty and left out. i just wanted to cut so bad but i didnt have anything sharp. i like to carry at least a safety pin w/ me wen i no that shelby will be there cuz its like a security blanket to me. so i dont no if i shoud tell my friend that i dont wanna be around shelby and to cancel my plans w/ her cuz i dont want to be tempted to SI, try to be a good friend and go and endure it, or if anyone has any other options, any at all please let me no.

thank u all!!

~jessica

plantt
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Post by plantt » Mon Aug 15, 2005 3:48 am

what about seeing if you can keep a more open mind... see how you feel about shelby without factoring in what you've heard about her? you mention that you don't really know her yet everything you've heard has been bad... maybe see for yourself :)
what could you do if your friend is hanging on to shelbys arm?
amusement parks are usually fairly big things... if you get feeling uncomfortable could you go play a game or go on a ride alone or something?
hope things work out :grnstar:

jamie28

Post by jamie28 » Mon Aug 15, 2005 3:49 am

suck it up and don't say anything yet. go on the trip to six flags and see how it goes.

if it sucks, explain to your friend that you don't like shelby, she makes you uncomfortable, and you would prefer if she didn't invite shelby to do things with the two of you.

don't talk to her about it before the trip because she *may* tell shelby and that would make it even more uncomfortable for everyone. if you are sure she would not tell shelby, then i'd say talk to her now, suck it up and go this once with her since she has already been invited and it would be very rude to "un-invite" her.

jamie

everythingends666
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Post by everythingends666 » Mon Aug 15, 2005 3:52 am

thanx. what would i do w/out this place. u guys had some good ideas.

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roseblum15
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Post by roseblum15 » Mon Aug 15, 2005 4:46 am

I may be the odd one out here, but I dont' think that you should just go and suck it up. If you are uncomfortable about it already, how much fun do you think you will have. There is the possiblity that it will be a great time and you all will have fun. I don't think that you should go though if you are uncomfortable. Tell your friend that someting came up and you just cant make it that day. If she persist to know why then explain nicely that you are not comfortable with shelby.

Basically you have the choice to go and try to have a good time, or stay home and miss out on possible fun, with that come the chance of savign yourself misery also.

guest1

Post by guest1 » Mon Aug 15, 2005 5:00 am

I kinda agree with roseblum15, when that happens to me, and it has, I just say screw it and let them go. I know I would have a miserable time and I dont compete with anyone for friendship.

It's their loss

Although there are times when the 3rd person is needy and you and your friend know it and have already discussed it and you just need to be tolerant and understanding.

.

everythingends666
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Post by everythingends666 » Tue Aug 16, 2005 5:20 pm

actually, i ended up going and it wasnt all that bad. shelby wasnt as cold towards me as she had been in the past, but thanx for all of your replys its helped a lot! :)

jamie28

Post by jamie28 » Wed Aug 17, 2005 12:55 am

glad it worked out so well.

maybe she was just nervous about being around you or something before, but now that she knows you better she is more comfortable.

jamie

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