Need help coping with mixed feelings (sex)

[Thunder_chey]

I originaly put this in place but i wanted to discuss this and figure puting it in coping is best.


I think that maby i am bisexual. I am atracted to guys but i find myself being atracted to women too. I feel so confused. (like i didnt all ready have a lot of problems)

I guess im scared to really tell anyone. I get discriminated and treated badly because of my dissabilities. I feel like most of my friends tould not want to be my friend if they found out i was bi.

Im scared that maby that will make it even harder for me to adopt children some day. I know im only 26 right now and i dont really want to start a family till im 31 or 32, but i cant deny how i feel. I feel like if i found a good guy i would stay with him, but i feel like the same way with a woman too.

Are there any bi/gay/lesbian people on the bus board i can talk to? How did you finaly decide that being bi/gay/lesbian was just right? How did you tell your friends? How did you tell your family?

I hope i dont sound like shit. It probably came out wrong. I want to explore my feelings but i dont know how to do it safely without trigging myself. I want to go out and meet others like me, but im really scared of going out of my home. I only really go out to do errands or go to work.

Chey

[mallie]

Chey,

Coping is a good place for a post like this

There are quite a few bi and gay people on the board, you should be able to get many different opinions and experiences.

There is a thread on mainat the moment about telling people about bisexuality, it might be useful to read.

Personally, I identify as bi, although I'm not fond of labels and would use it reluctantly. I've known this for a few years, just based on who I've been interested in. Its not something I've gone out of my way to announce to people, although I certainly don't hide it. I've said enough generally that it should be obvious to my family without having to sit them down and say "I'm Bi". When one of my friends found out, it was because I'd been talking about something to do with the queer group at uni and he replied "but you're not gay" and I said of course I'm not, and got him all confused. Then I had to have a big discussion about all of that - he was surprised, and curious, but very accepting.

I was involved with the queer groups at my uni for a while, although I drifted away from that (general withdrawing from people that comes with depression). That was really useful to find people that relate. There are groups around that you could go and get involved in (depending on where you are different things would be available). There are webboards or email groups too (try yahoo groups maybe). And there are people here you can talk to.

I'm sorry that I don't have anything more useful to say, but I am around if you need to talk. Good on you for trying to work through your feelings and sort them out.

- mallie.

[Space_Man]

Im scared that maby that will make it even harder for me to adopt children some day…

I don’t really see why it would; they are looking for evidence of your stability—I would think that your sexuality would be fairly irrelevant (depending, of course, on what kind of adoption agency you were to go through in the first place…might want to steer clear of Catholic-run organizations, for example! ).

[Thunder_chey]

Thanks guys, you are a great bunch


Chey

[ComfortablyNumb]

I know how you feel. I'm finally (thankfully) over that slump you are in yourself. I'm a lesbian, and I've known for awhile. And you don't sound like shit. You sounds like the vast majority of the people trying to figure this out. PM anytime if you want to talk or something.