cowardly *si*

midnight fantasy · Post by **midnight fantasy** » Wed Apr 20, 2005 8:04 am

people who have found out i have been visiting bus for help with my *si* have been saying im cowardly coz im not brave enough to get help from people i can talk to in person and i have to go to strangers to do it. are they right? i just dont know anymore.

mallie · Post by **mallie** » Wed Apr 20, 2005 8:16 am

You aren't cowardly for seeking help where you can get it. Ultimately, IRL help is probably something to aim for, but not being able to do that yet does not make you cowardly. I'm not sure I understand why people would say that to you. Doesn't sound very supportive or useful.

sug160489 · Post by **sug160489** » Wed Apr 20, 2005 9:00 am

hey no u arent cowardly - in fact even admitting stuff on the net to complete strangers is pretty scary

i no that theres certain stuff that i could never tell my parents and its taken me 5 years to even think about seeing a counsellor but i dont consider myself a coward because of that

i think that strength comes from the ability to seek help where u feel comfortable and u are not a coward just because u feel like u cant seek help IRL yet u r strong because u can hold on thru all of this and seek help where u feel comfortable

Love Sarah

NobodyToYou · Post by **NobodyToYou** » Wed Apr 20, 2005 7:37 pm

I think that is a very unhelpful way to look at it...
Is it cowardly to tell your best friend something and not be comfortable telling someone you just met? I don't think they would say it was...but it is really the same thing. It just means you are comfortable talking about different things in different situations. If you are more comfortable talking to us on the computer than people IRL, there is nothing wrong with that...I am a lot more comfortable here too.
Try not to worry about it. I am not saying that you shouldn't talk to people IRL, but at least you have found a place for yourself that you feel comfortable. That should be a good thing, not a bad thing. Don't close other people out because of us, just let this be another support for you.
Sorry if this doesn't make sense. I don't have time to read back over it.

kate_ · Post by **kate_** » Thu Apr 21, 2005 12:55 am

thats COMPLETE bs. i've tried to get help from doctors and stuff....trust me it's waaaaaaaay harder than you can even imagine. most people who dont do it dont understand it. you're lucky you found somewhere to find help and comfort rather than dealing with it alone

balletomane · Post by **balletomane** » Thu Apr 21, 2005 5:44 am

Asking for help, of any kind, requires enormous amounts of bravery. It requires that you recognize and admit that you have a problem. It also requires that you acknowledge the fact that you are not all powerful, that you can't always fix everything on your own. Taking the time to reflect on your life and your self and recognizing and admitting that you could use a little help is bravery. Not cowardice.

b

limestone · Post by **limestone** » Mon May 09, 2005 8:49 pm

i think they are right in a sense. it is way easier to sit down in front of a computer and describe how your life is not right etc etc. but to actually talk to your parents or siblings or teachers or friends takes a lot because it's embarrassing and ultimately more difficult and complex. But, I think what they are trying to say is that computer talking is a form of what they see as running away from the supportive people you already have. It's not so much being a coward but choosing to say you're in pain but doing it in a tiny whisper so that nobody can hear you in real life and so ultimately you don't have to do anything about the consequences of saying I'm in pain. It's great if the PC can be used to help deal with pain but often it doesn't. And that is what they mean I think: maybe just review how much time you spend and what you're saying online and then really think for you, why you do that i.e. is it because you're afraid (which is perfectly ok to be) or is it because it's easier (which is also ok to do) etc? talking about si is a great way to not live your life. don't fall into that trap. when you come online ask yourself what is your purpose and how will you know once you've achieved it? what will you take away afterwards? will being online make it easier or harder to interact with others afterwards?
anyway, just my thoughts.

midnight fantasy · Post by **midnight fantasy** » Mon May 09, 2005 9:30 pm

mallie wrote: Ultimately, IRL help is probably something to aim for, but not being able to do that yet does not make you cowardly.

cal me stupid but whats an IRL???

plantt · Post by **plantt** » Tue May 10, 2005 12:00 am

irl=in real life. people you know face-to-face

RG · Post by RG » Tue May 10, 2005 1:19 am

I don't believe you are a coward. It takes alot to talk to people face to face and that only comes with time. It is also nice with bus that these people, know what your going through in which people in real life don't understand. So personally I don't think your a coward I think you are brave for getting some kind of aide all together. Keep up the good work and take care

forevercryingtears03 · Post by **forevercryingtears03** » Fri May 13, 2005 4:35 am

u are not a coward just because u seek help. even help over IRL or AIM is also good...just having an outlet, having someone to listen to u and give u advice. once again..ur not cowardly...take gentle care

-Aryn-

midnight fantasy · Post by **midnight fantasy** » Mon May 30, 2005 11:10 am

forevercryingtears03 wrote:. even help over IRL or AIM is also good...

-Aryn-

whats AIM

jaded melody · Post by **jaded melody** » Mon May 30, 2005 11:24 am

AIM = AOL Instant Messenger

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