last time i wanted to si, i didn't because.......

Oblivion · Post by **Oblivion** » Mon May 02, 2005 7:29 pm

I cut yesterday but managed to stop myself when i was a photos of my fiance. It reminded me of my Spring wedding next year in America. My dress is sleeveless!!!!!!!!!!

falling... · Post by **falling...** » Mon May 02, 2005 8:47 pm

i am worth more. i am going to stop. i am going to get to a month SI free. i am not gonna let 'him' control me no more. i do not deserve to be hurt. he will not win
_________________
Ferrari FXX

pretty · Post by **pretty** » Tue May 03, 2005 7:44 pm

I don't deserve that.
It would be a step backwards.
I like the way sun feels on my skin.
So I got home and made myself a drink and tried to relax and just enjoy being home and safe.

Chessie · Post by **Chessie** » Wed May 04, 2005 12:24 am

because I knew I stronger than to just give in. I knew giving in would only cause me more upset and anger at myself. Plus I've made so long without SI that I didn't want break my record of how far I've made it - getting close to 8 months SI free.

-C.

cb_47 · Post by **cb_47** » Wed May 04, 2005 9:29 am

Because of a deal I made... gotta uphold my part of the bargain.

marylou · Post by **marylou** » Wed May 04, 2005 1:05 pm

Because of the dream I had last night. He was hugging me and I don't want to break that

Koru · Post by **Koru** » Wed May 04, 2005 5:38 pm

Because I don't want to make new scars, because everytime it gets worse and that scares me, because HE is not worth damaging myself over.

kate_ · Post by **kate_** » Thu May 05, 2005 4:25 pm

because i hate going to the gym, and after 15 min my arms start to sting like crazyyyy

iAMsincity · Post by **iAMsincity** » Fri May 06, 2005 3:56 am

last time i wanted to si was actually today during spanish class. i saw a huge half-straightened paperclip on the floor, picked it up, and immediately thought of cutting. i sat in spanish debating on whether i should or not, and finally the promise of not doing it won over. i don't really know why. i just felt i HAD TO. just one. but for me, one turns into many, possibly hundreds. it's been three days since i've cut, and seeing the paperclip made me want to just curl up and cry. but anyway, i'm glad i told myself no. later i stuffed the paperclip up the hand towel dispenser just for the hell of it. and it jammed pretty nicely.

Catylyx · Post by **Catylyx** » Sat May 07, 2005 3:05 am

i didn't cut (and still haven't) because i have a doctor appointment in a couple of days, and i don't want them see or find any fresh marks (i'm already freaking out over my scars)

that and saturday night the band is having a concert and i don't want to risk anything even if i am staying at the merch table and helping sell things, i just don't want to feel guilty when i'm hanging out with the guys and knowing that i had to do this right before their show.......(i don't know that didn't even make sense...*shrug*)

GLaDOS · Post by **GLaDOS** » Sat May 07, 2005 10:04 am

I took some music with me to the bathroom, and it took my mind off cutting. ^_^

fieldmouse · Post by **fieldmouse** » Mon May 09, 2005 3:50 pm

I didn't have the guts. It's too scary. That doesn't really get me anywhere good though.

rainy day · Post by **rainy day** » Mon May 09, 2005 8:43 pm

I had alot of support from people on bus so i didnt si

thanks everyone

Nazgul · Post by **Nazgul** » Wed May 11, 2005 1:50 am

I had an appointment with my therapist in three hours and I didn't want to tell her I SIed.

pretty · Post by **pretty** » Wed May 11, 2005 10:08 am

I knew the feelings would pass in a few hours, and si just wasn't worth it.

P!nk · Post by **P!nk** » Fri May 13, 2005 12:27 am

tuesday because i went to play soccer instead and everytime i became too tired to keep going i kept chanting in my head "I didn't SI because" which was sorta the name of this thread

wednesday because i had some really bad news so I did take more valium then i normally do and headed straight to bed, woke up, watched a movie, took another dose of valium and went back to bed. Had to see therapists supervisor as she is out and i knew she was taking special time out of her schedule to see me & give me all the support i needed so I had to do the same & not SI. &&& it was outta some sorta sense of honour I have toward my normal T.

pretty · Post by **pretty** » Sat May 14, 2005 11:36 am

Becuase I won't let him have that kind of power over me anymore. It's been too long.

nika · Post by **nika** » Mon May 16, 2005 10:50 am

my mom came and I talked to her about whatever was going on (I can't remember now

)

acdcrocker1909 · Post by **acdcrocker1909** » Wed May 18, 2005 2:45 am

because i didnt want to look Brooke, Jenn and Tina in the eyes and tell them i did it again..

Plus, I sat there for half of my next class and talked to Jenn.. and it made me think about how i didnt want to harm myself.. and that i want to find healthier ways to take out my stress..

-dani

mootang · Post by **mootang** » Mon May 23, 2005 12:37 am

i didnt cause TheEnd told me about this and got really excited about quitting again

after that i slept on the couch so i wouldnt go into my room and be tempted

last time i wanted to si, i didn't because.......

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