Before

[(*Haven*)]

1. how will this situation or feeling change if i hurt myself?

I feel calmer and in control and I won't have to fight the urge to not hurt myself.

2. what will hurting myself bring to the situation? what will it take away from the situation?

I'll have to hide the cuts. I won't get my two weeks like I want to get. It'll take away some hurt and pain I'm feeling and hopefully I won't panic so much about things.

3. how do i want to feel about this in the long run? is hurting myself likely to get me closer to or farther from feeling that way?

Hurting myself isn't going to solve or fix anything and I know it. I'm going to feel bad about hurting myself in the long run when I know I don't need to do it.

4. if hurting myself seems like my best option right now, how long will the relief it brings last? what will i do then?

I don't know how long the relief will last. Something else could happen to make me feel worse later and I don't want to hurt myself now if it could happen later on.

5. what is something i could do now instead of hurting myself? how will it change the situation i'm in? how long will that change last, and what will i do then?

I could write. I could knit. I could write to figure things out or knit my scarf and get it done and feel really good about that. I can go to sleep too.

6. how will i feel tomorrow if i hurt myself? how will i feel tomorrow if i do the other thing i came up with?

I'll feel bad. I'll have to hide it from my parents. If I do something positive, I'll feel good that I got through an urge.

7. what do i really want to do right now? how can i best honor the self-protective instinct that has me wanting to self-injure right now

I can get through this. I can do my positive things to get through this because I don't want to hurt myself.

[pretty]

It sounds to me like you have the urge in pretty good perspective, and under control for the most part. That's great, but I know it doesn't make it easier in reality, or make it hurt a lot less. I think what I'm trying to say is that I think it's good that you posted even though things sound pretty well under control. Support is still important.

Hurting myself isn't going to solve or fix anything and I know it. I'm going to feel bad about hurting myself in the long run when I know I don't need to do it.

That's a really positive realisation, I hope you can hold onto it. Si doesn't fix anything, and you don't <i>need</i> it.

You're right, you can get through this

[Wandering]

Hey

I don't have much to say, sorry, except...

If I do something positive, I'll feel good that I got through an urge.

Have you thought about keeping a record of each urge you do manage to beat, and how you did so. That way, you can look back to encourage yourself that it is possible, and can also see the most effective ways for you to get through urges in the future.

Take care
Andi

[(*Haven*)]

Thanks for the replies back.

I keep a monthly calendar. I mark down days I've had thoughts of SI or SU or both, and keep track of how many days I make it a month and each day free I get to color in the block. It really helps.

[cb_47]

That's a really awesome idea! What a way to turn something that feels so negative--oh, I thought about SI/SU--into a positive record of successes! Mind if I steal that for myself?

[(*Haven*)]

cb_47, I've PMed you.