last time i wanted to si, i didn't because.......
- Everybody_Else's_Girl
- creating your space
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- Joined: Tue Apr 19, 2005 12:47 am
(1) my t told me that i should not hesitate call if i wanted to hurt myself, and i believe her. i don't want to not call, and then have to tell her that i did something next session. i also desperately don't want to call and bother her. for some reason i especially care that she not feel that i couldn't call (never felt that way with any other t- usually i just went ahead and did whatever i wanted anyway).
(2) i just ordered a dress for an upcoming event and it is strapless. it is my motivation to workout (within healthful limits) and to not si.
(2) i just ordered a dress for an upcoming event and it is strapless. it is my motivation to workout (within healthful limits) and to not si.
i decided to go to practice to get the grrr out instead of staying home and letting the grrr take over & destroy me. tired myself out enough that urge went bye bye for now.
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I've started taking Box-fit classes (like aerobics with boxing moves)!!! It's so good for getting out the urges.
1. Aggression is focussed and let out
2. You get so tired, it exhausts you if you work at it
3. Those hormones go crazy with happiness post-workout
It's amazing!!!
1. Aggression is focussed and let out
2. You get so tired, it exhausts you if you work at it
3. Those hormones go crazy with happiness post-workout
It's amazing!!!
"You loosen my chains and just ask me to trust you. But it's so much easier this way, even though I know that I am bound."
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- one of us
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Because people on BUS sat wih me for a bit and then I went to the gym and worked out and one of my housemates was in when I got home.
Because I have to get changed in front of people to dive tommorrow and to swim and becuase I am not going to let stupid guy issues push me into SI.
Because I have to get changed in front of people to dive tommorrow and to swim and becuase I am not going to let stupid guy issues push me into SI.
- Always look towards the sunshine and your shadows will fall behind you -
- Everybody_Else's_Girl
- creating your space
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- Joined: Tue Apr 19, 2005 12:47 am
1)Because my trigger was missing my friend who will be gone for another 2 months, and I didn't want to have to tell her, "Hey, 2 days after you left I got really lonely and depressed and I cut myself."
2) Because telling her every time I cut is one of my safety valves--I always know that if I do, I'll have to tell her about--so just doing it and not telling her was not an option.
2) Because telling her every time I cut is one of my safety valves--I always know that if I do, I'll have to tell her about--so just doing it and not telling her was not an option.
SI-free since 3/13/05
- berendsenea
- creating your space
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- Location: Ohio
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I was very depressed today about work and my life in general and how i'm not doing a good job of taking care of me. So for a brief minute or two, i thought back to cutting. It didn't last long, it's been so long now since i have, and i usually have a few days like this every year where i dig myself into a hole and i need the jaws of life to yank me out or i spend weeks moping and writing suicidal prose. But getting back to the office, i was glad i didn't. I am not my job, and while i may not have a great support system, sometimes i get the support i need just be happy coincidences or whatever. So, i'm still SI free. Go me.
peace.
beth
peace.
beth
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- settling in
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- Location: Birmingham. West Midlands, not Alabama ;-)
I didn't because the last time I did (yesterday) I did it so badly that I terrified myself, and so whenever today I felt urgy, I thought back to how scared I was when I saw what I'd done - and I also looked at the horrible wound, and that stopped me. And now I never want to do it again, because I felt so awful and scared. And I'm determined I won't.
Determined to get better.
- Eric_the_Red
- building community
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- Joined: Thu Apr 28, 2005 8:37 pm
- Location: Carbondale, Illinois
Tuesday: because I thought, "Do I reall want to throw 8.75 years of recovery away?" And because I started an sewing project I'd been meaning to do . . . and no, I don't count the occassional stab in the thumb with the needle as SI, I call that suffering for my art.
Eric L
SI free 10 years and counting!
It is better to be hated for who you are than loved for who you are not
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SI free 10 years and counting!
It is better to be hated for who you are than loved for who you are not
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- sassy koala
- awe-inspiring
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- FairydustSparkles
- settling in
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Because I went out and bought a punch bag eysterday (a small one but still) and it's now in my room at uni and i can just kick the s*** out of it!
Beauty Queen of only 18
She had some trouble with herself
He was always there to help her
She always belonged to someone else...
~where fairies dare to fly~
Wake up, wake up, you've got to believe, wake up, wake up...life keeps going on without us, long after we're dead and gone.
The hardest part is not finding out what we need to be, it's being content with who we are
She had some trouble with herself
He was always there to help her
She always belonged to someone else...
~where fairies dare to fly~
Wake up, wake up, you've got to believe, wake up, wake up...life keeps going on without us, long after we're dead and gone.
The hardest part is not finding out what we need to be, it's being content with who we are
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