Help, i feel so alone

tips on how to cope: dealing with your feelings, dealing with the consequences of self-harm in your life. share your ideas and maybe pick up some new skills, too. you don't have to want to stop to learn something new here.

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Spottykins
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Help, i feel so alone

Post by Spottykins » Fri Sep 17, 2004 3:11 pm

i've self harmed on and off for the last couple of years. most of the year i can keep control of it and dont have the urge to do it. but about once every 6 months i get really low and i can't see any other obvious answers. these periods sometimes have an obvious trigger but most of the time its not clear.
all my close friends are just about to leave to go to uni, im in the year below them so i'm being left on my own. im trying to be happy for them, but im scared of being alone again. i feel like im constantly fighting to protect my self against me. normally i would feel i had suport when i started to get low (before it got to far) but with all my friends so far away there only me to protect me and i dont think im strong enough.
i did cut my self yesterday but i mangaged to stop before i did too much damage. i dont want to go back to doing it again, but its so hard not to.
i hate feeling so alone, and so pathetic. but im just to tired to keep fighting against my self.

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limestone
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Post by limestone » Fri Sep 17, 2004 7:06 pm

Do you have a student counsellor at your college? That might be a source of support whilst your friends are at uni.
take care :star:

Spottykins
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Post by Spottykins » Sat Sep 18, 2004 12:39 am

ironically, i am a voluntary student 'listener' at my school so i cant really get help there.

Unfortuantly no form of proper help is provided, since i go to a very english school, and the english dont talk about their probeblems.

my friends given me some information about concilling in my area though.

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Bathelina
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Post by Bathelina » Sun Sep 19, 2004 11:13 am

Hey, I'm Hannah.

I know how you feel. It's tough.... all my friends left me too when I was at my old school, but I've made a new start in secondary school. I'm now in year 8 with quite a few friends.

I have similar probelms. I've been able to cope for the last 2 or 3 years without SH'ing, [those were quite bad years for me, I take the smallest things very badly] but a couple of days ago I did. That was when I slipped and lost focus.

I do feel really pessimistic a lot, and depressed, but I push these thoughts right to the back of my head: they don't matter. My main priority is staying happy. And though, yes, it is hard at times, it's something I have to do.

I think you need to be positive too. Push those negative thoughts away. Try to think on the bright side: you'll still keep in touch with your friends, and you can make new ones. Just b/c they aren't your old friends doesn't mean they won't understand.

Tell a counsellor or school nurse or something about how sad you are about this. And also, tell your friends that are going how upset you are. They will understand, I PROMISE. They will give you support and call you a lot anyway, but if they know how upset it's making you and what it's making you do, it'll be better. Seriously; please try this.

Even if you have to be a little selfish it doesn't matter. What does matter is that you're happy and people that are close to you know how you feel. Only then can they help you.

Stay positive, focused on being happy, distract yourself from any negative thoughts and tell them. It will help.

LOTS of love and best wishes,
Hannah :):):):):)
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