A question

[kurdt_kobain]

my mom and me got into a huge fight. i yelled at her for some inane reason and didn't say anything so i kicked the wall and she came up and grabbed me and slapped me and called me a bitch and a retard and threw a tack at me and told me to cut myself. i deserved it, because i was bad and i yelled at her. she's my mom i need to respect that. i am a bitch.

i cried when my dad came in and said shit to me like 'nice going. you're real cool.' and stuff and my mom came in and was like 'what are you donig besides keeping me up?' i said 'sorry.' she said, 'stop making so much noise. and see that laundry? clean it up.' i said sorry. she said, 'do you have anything to say to me?' I said no. she yelled at me and left.

my dad was mad at me and said, 'take your meds.' i said, 'okay.' and i took them from him. he said, 'take them while i watch you. i don't trust you.' i go, 'what?'

i wanted to cut really badly all night but i couldn't because my mom had thrown my tack at me and told me to 'cause that's what i seem to like.' i didn't know what to do.

how am i supposed to cope without yelling or cutting? could someone tell me?

thanks.

[Lyndsie]

What other coping skills work for you?

When i can't think of any I try making a list. It sometimes helps.

~Take care of yourself~



Lyndsie

[littlethings]

oh god, honey that sounds like a terrible situation.

You do not deserve that sort of treatment (and now I'm beginning to understand why you have such a bad self-image).

Even if you were out of line, your mother has no right to tell you to cut yourself or hit you. She also should have enough self-control not to call you names, but unfortunately it would appear she does not.

Your dad also handled the situation very badly. Even if he has a reason to believe that you are not taking your meds (I don't know if he does or not) that was a terrible way to deal with the situation.

If you do have problems with communication (like yelling for silly reasons) it appears likely that you learned them from your parents, and either way it doesn't make you retarded or a bitch.

That was absolutely wrong of her. No one ever has a right to do that. Do you understand? I know I keep saying it, but you need to know that.

No one should ever ask you to hurt yourself. She was very, very wrong.

It sounds like you never learned(or were taught) how to express anger in a healthy way, therapy could help with that in the long term. Some short term solutions are things like slamming a pillow against the floor or a bed (sounds silly, but I've done it and it does help) or throwing ice or eggs in a tub, scribbling wildly on posterboard...all those sorts of things.

I hope that you're okay right now.

JoAnna

[whoareyou?doyouevenknow?]

i agree wiv littlethings u dont desver any of it
is there anyway maybe u could go out for a run? or call someone u can tlk to u?

[strmdncr]

I wanted to say something, but seem to be at a loss for words so I'll just let you know that someone has read your post and cares. That sounds like a really uncomfortable situation and I'm sorry to hear that it happened to you. I offer you gentle caring thoughts.

[XclippedXwingsX]

I wanna say something but can't... It kinda reminds me of my family life every single day. *sighs* But I agree with littlethings. I hope everything gets better. I'm sorry your being treated like that. You deserve so much better than that!

xXx Charm xXx

[Sad Poetess]

first of all i'm so sorry that you had to experience that. no one should have to go through what you went through.
i admire you for not cutting when your mum told you to (at least i don't think you did...) if i was in your situation i can totally see myself screaming, 'fine, i'll cut your name into my arm so i will forever have a scar with your name to it.'
but you didn't. and i admire that.
i think you have to come to an understanding that your parents don't have control over what you feel. only you do. as elanor rosevelt said, 'no one can make you feel inferior without your consent'. you can choose to accept it, or you can reject it. it's up to you.
but as for ways of coping, i really don't have many answers other than the usual list of things (i'm sure you're well aware of those). i wish i could give you a magical thing that would make it all go away...sorry, yet to be invented *mentally puts that on the 'things to do' list*
but you will be okay. i know that. i know that you are a fighter and a survivor and you will get through this.
*hugs to you*