before (comments welcome)

tools to help you assess your urges before you give in to them, and to help you understand and learn from slips after they happen. by posting here, you're saying that you are serious about exploring the feelings behind your self-harm in depth, whether you're ready to stop hurting yourself or not. to request posting access, click usergroups above and join before and after.

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before (comments welcome)

Post by Guest » Tue Jul 04, 2006 9:56 pm

how will this situation or feeling change if i hurt myself?
i'd feel something other then what i'm feeling now. i want to feel anything other than this


what will hurting myself bring to the situation? what will it take away from the situation?
it'll make me feel something else, and it'll take away the feeling of loneliness for a little while.


how do i want to feel about this in the long run? is hurting myself likely to get me closer to or farther from feeling that way?
i don't wanna feel like i'm alone anymore. hurting myself may help for a little while, but i know in the end it'll make me feel even more alone, cause i'll need to hide from people for a while.


if hurting myself seems like my best option right now, how long will the relief it brings last? what will i do then?
it'll last hopefully until tomorrow. i don't know what i'll do when the relief goes.

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Wandering
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Post by Wandering » Wed Jul 05, 2006 6:55 pm

Hey, I hope you made it through and you're ok.
i don't wanna feel like i'm alone anymore. hurting myself may help for a little while
Why do you think hurting yourself makes you feel less lonely? What other things could you do that help make you feel less alone? Would doing something like collecting pics of you with your friends or family, and putting them somewhere where you can look at them when you feel bad, be helpful?

Sorry, not very awake right now :roll:
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Re: before (comments welcome)

Post by Smeagol » Sun Jul 16, 2006 12:05 pm

not alone wrote: i'd feel something other then what i'm feeling now. i want to feel anything other than this
Can you name the feeling you had then? Anger, sadness, loneliness? Or just generally, "feeling low". Once you've done that, could you think of an opposite emotion and pick something to make you feel that? In DBT they often talk about acting opposite to how you feel, so if you're feeling really miserable, could you try smiling? Physically smiling I mean. I'm not asking you to magically cheer up. :) But sometimes physically smiling lifts the mood. Similarly, maybe watching a really silly film, or listening to a really silly song can jerk us into a more positive mood that we are now, even if we're not really in the mood for it.

it'll make me feel something else, and it'll take away the feeling of loneliness for a little while.
Like Andi said, why would it take away the feeling of loneliness? If it's because you know other people do it, could you do something else other people do, like listen to some popular music or something? I'm just grasping at straws here; I'd eally like you to elaborate on why hurting yourself would reduce loneliness.
Act in such a way as to make yourself feel capable and effective

The change starts now.

If in doubt, don't

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