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I fought my urges, by hearing news that something bad happened to someone who wronged me, which made me happy. It wasn't dire, they killed the club at our school because of their stupidity. I guss my question is has this ever worked for anyone else, and how do you get the I win fealing without someone else having something bad happen to them, which I realize is unreliable. Trust me they soo deserved it. How can you keep the feeling that the world is working out the way it should be to keep you from SIing?

It sounds like you basically just heard news that made you happy, so I guess you need to focus on ways of making yourself happy, e.g. by thinking of good things in your life, of future plans, of things you've achieved/are proud of, or by doing something you enjoy doing.

I agree with Gwylan. Try to find ways to create that "I win" feeling from your own victories rather than external events. Ultimately you need to take control of your own happiness rather than leave it up to chance.

What other things make you feel happy?

balletomane wrote:I agree with Gwylan. Try to find ways to create that "I win" feeling from your own victories rather than external events. Ultimately you need to take control of your own happiness rather than leave it up to chance.

What other things make you feel happy?

My own happiness, that sounds easier then I think it is. I guess if I'm less hard on myself that is a start.

Being kind to yourself is always a good start. And happiness doesn't mean you have to feel fantastic. There's a lot of gradience in "happiness" and something which lifts your mood a little bit is still good. It might not make you feel fine, but it could still help with urges.

Thanks for all you advice, I know that being nice to yourself is soo obvious to some people, but unless I remind myself about it, it doesn't come naturally. I tend to have a hard time thinking about myself, when all I do it seems is to think about others.