bus

This post is about a slip yesterday

have you taken care of your physiacl wounds? if not, go do that now. we'll wait.
About to go clean them, BRB, okay, done.

what had happened just before?
my mother was being her usual self

what were you thinking and feeling?
thinking that i can never do anything right and feeling like a complete failure

why did you end up hurting yourself then instead of some other time? was there an event that was the final straw? what was it?
because the tools were available then and they haven't been available for over 3 weeks; my mom told me that I would have to clean the entire house today because we are having company tomorrow (Sat.)

how did the situation get to the final straw stage? trace it back through the events thatled up to the last event. look for some point at which you could have made a different decision and not arrived at the final straw.
1. She yelled that I left the light on. 2. She yelled that I hadn't done the laundry. 3. She yelled cuz I left the light on again. 4. She yelled that my room was a mess. 5. She told me I had to clean the house. I prolly could have stopped at any of the first four but the last one just set me off. After that, I had no choice, in my mind.

were there outside factors like drugs, alsohol, being off your meds, lack of sleep, etc? can you address those in the future? how?
no drugs ever, alcohol occassionally, but none last night (tonight is a different story), been on my meds regularly for 5 days now, and get plenty of sleep

what other ways of coping did you try besides self-harm? how well did they work?
tried journalling, but it did nothing to help the urges; i had already gone over that edge

in retrospect, are there coping methods that you now realize might have helped? what were they?
I could have come here, seeing as I was home but it didn't cross my mind.

name at least two things you will do to help yourself remember those coping methods if you end up in this situation again.
1. Carry my backpack to whatever room I am in (It has my coping stuff in it) and 2. can't think of anything else.

how do you feel about the situation that led to self-harm now? is it resolved? if not, what are some steps you might take toward resolution?
it's resolved, and the house is clean, for now

are you likely to be in that emotional place again? how will you recognize it when you're in that situation?
I get into that place alot, but she normally doesn't set me off like that. If I get that way again, I start thinking about pain and blood and stuff like that, so I guess that is how I can tell.

what will you try before you resort to self-harm if you're in that situation again? list three specific things you will commit to trying.
1. coping questionaires in my backpack 2. post here 3. distractions (I have alot of websites that I go to that can distract me really good)


Hope I did this right......

Emily

((((Hugs)))) I understand about slips like that; they happen. I'm sorry things got so hard for you and I hope they are better now.

Susie

Thanks for the reply. Things are slightly better now.

Emily