bus

Before:

Before You Self-Harm
write down the shadow that's hiding behind the urge. look at it. ask yourself:

• how will this situation or feeling change if i hurt myself?
  I feel as if hurting myself will ease the stress and anxiety.
• what will hurting myself bring to the situation? what will it take away from the situation?
  It will bring fulfillness and relief. It will take away my hurt and feelings.
• how do i want to feel about this in the long run? is hurting myself likely to get me closer to or farther from feeling that way?
  I feel like this will pass eventually. Hurting myself would get me farther from feeling like everything will pass.
• if hurting myself seems like my best option right now, how long will the relief it brings last? what will i do then?
  It will last a few days. I will try and find something else to do to help myself.
• what is something i could do now instead of hurting myself? how will it change the situation i'm in? how long will that change last, and what will i do then?
  Reading or journaling. It will last maybe an hour. I will still want to hurt myself, I'm not sure if I would give in or keep trying to busy myself.
• how will i feel tomorrow if i hurt myself? how will i feel tomorrow if i do the other thing i came up with?
  I will be satisfied if I hurt myself, but I will think about it the entire day if I don't.
• what do i really want to do right now? how can i best honor the self-protective instinct that has me wanting to self-injure right now?

I really want to hurt myself. I've wanted it most of the night.
I could
-read
-journal
- listen to music
-treat myself to something nice

urges aren't necessarily the enemy. they happen for reasons, and they're an expression of a desire to stay alive and stay sane and keep coping. remember that.

More Before Questions To Answer

• Why do I feel I need to hurt myself? What has brought me to this point?
  These last few days have been a wreck. With stress from parents and added stress of myself feeling abandoned by others, I am at my breaking point. The depression is taking a toll and I'm so down. I want to feel satisfied for something.
• Have I been here before? What did I do to deal with it? How did I feel then?
  I have and I harmed or cried myself to sleep. I never felt better and had to dig myself out of a hole.
• What I have done to ease this discomfort so far? What else can I do that won't hurt me?
  I have played games, distracted myself, watched tv, wrote, got a bath, read, searched dog breeds. I'm going to try reading and music and videos and journaling.
• How do I feel right now?
  I'm so down. I'm done. I feel useless. Depressed
• How will I feel when I am hurting myself?
  Satisfied
• How will I feel after hurting myself? How will I feel tomorrow morning?
• Can I avoid this stressor, or deal with it better in the future?
  I don't know
• Do I need to hurt myself?

I don't know


Remember you don't have to answer all the questions if you don't feel up to it.