before

tools to help you assess your urges before you give in to them, and to help you understand and learn from slips after they happen. by posting here, you're saying that you are serious about exploring the feelings behind your self-harm in depth, whether you're ready to stop hurting yourself or not. to request posting access, click usergroups above and join before and after.

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Maryel42
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before

Post by Maryel42 » Sat Feb 22, 2014 4:55 pm

size=200]Before You Self-Harm[/size] write down the shadow that's hiding behind the urge. look at it. ask yourself:
  • how will this situation or feeling change if i hurt myself?
    I might have more energy, I think I will be better able to forget my current thoughts. Having the pain will just feel good.
  • what will hurting myself bring to the situation? what will it take away from the situation?
    It proves to myself that I'm no better than the urge. I deserve to be hurt.
  • how do i want to feel about this in the long run? is hurting myself likely to get me closer to or farther from feeling that way?
    I want to be comforted. I feel that si will comfort me. The pain is a known. The act is a known. The consequence of this is a known. Not some chance that I don't know and cannot imagine.
  • if hurting myself seems like my best option right now, how long will the relief it brings last? what will i do then?
    I don't know. Going by past experience, maybe six or ten hours.
  • what is something i could do now instead of hurting myself? how will it change the situation i'm in? how long will that change last, and what will i do then?

    I don't know. It feels as though any other option wont give me peace of mind. I know this will. I want to.
  • how will i feel tomorrow if i hurt myself? how will i feel tomorrow if i do the other thing i came up with?
    I will have to hide the injury. Until it heals. And since I wont lie to my t about it, it will be even more exposed.
  • what do i really want to do right now? how can i best honor the self-protective instinct that has me wanting to self-injure right now?

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treasure
forum moderator - workshop & before & after
forum moderator - workshop & before & after
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Location: Melbourne, Australia

Re: before

Post by treasure » Sun Feb 23, 2014 10:42 am

Maryel42 wrote:what is something i could do now instead of hurting myself? ...
I don't know. It feels as though any other option wont give me peace of mind
maybe that is the case but in thinking about options you give yourself more choices, more available ways to cope and might feel more in control of the situation. even if you did si earlier, what else might you have done at that time, in that situation?
treasure
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shiny place or old place

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