After

tools to help you assess your urges before you give in to them, and to help you understand and learn from slips after they happen. by posting here, you're saying that you are serious about exploring the feelings behind your self-harm in depth, whether you're ready to stop hurting yourself or not. to request posting access, click usergroups above and join before and after.

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Butterfly.
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After

Post by Butterfly. » Mon Oct 04, 2010 12:25 am

Questions to Answer After A Slip
slips are chances to learn. you figure out what stresses are still too hard for you and you can work on how you'll deal with them next time you run into them. so instead of beating yourself up, take action.
  • have you taken care of your physical wounds? if not, go do that now. we'll wait.
    Yeah
  • what had happened just before?
    I was trying to go to bed. I'd been on msn which had helped me to feel better, then everything just came crashing down again.
  • what were you thinking and feeling?
    Feeling anxious, guilty, upset, tired, overwhelmed. There was a lot of thoughts going through my head.
  • why did you end up hurting yourself then instead of some other time? was there an event that was the final straw? what was it?
    I'd been trying to not SI for at least 2 days. I just couldn't take it any more. I needed to try and calm down, I needed to think clearly.
  • how did the situation get to the final straw stage? trace it back through the events that led up to the last event. look for some point at which you could have made a different decision and not arrived at the final straw.
    Urges had been worse yesterday, although they had been around for a few days. I reached out for help by messaging V late in the afternoon (which brought on the guilt), and then she called me after I didn't reply that quick (which added to the guilt). I spent sometime on the tramp, which didn't help. Parents came home, mum yelled at me for no reason, I got pretty upset by it and annoyed. Talked to Ness on msn which made me feel better, and I thought I was going to be able to get through the night. Things just got out of hand when I tried to go to bed.
  • were there outside factors like drugs, alsohol, being off your meds, lack of sleep, etc? can you address those in the future? how?
    Nope.
  • what other ways of coping did you try besides self-harm? how well did they work?
    Through out the day:
    messaging someone for support - made me feel worse
    elastic band - didn't help at all
    calming music - helped for a bit but then stopped
    exercise - didn't help at all, made me feel worse actually
    writing stuff down - couldn't get it all out, so I just got frustrated
    tried a few other things, all didn't help much
  • in retrospect, are there coping methods that you now realize might have helped? what were they?
    No. I tried everything that usually works.
  • name at least two things you will do to help yourself remember those coping methods if you end up in this situation again.
  • how do you feel about the situation that led to self-harm now? is it resolved? if not, what are some steps you might take toward resolution?
    There's too many little things. I'm less anxious about today now. My head is a little less noisy, and I can think a lot clearer. Emotions are a bit more in check.
  • are you likely to be in that emotional place again? how will you recognize it when you're in that situation?
    Probably not, as it was a build up over days.
  • what will you try before you resort to self-harm if you're in that situation again? list three specific things you will commit to trying.
    I could try reading. Specifically Shakespeare.
    If I can I could come on BUS. I avoided it last night, because it was late, but really I could've come on.
About Opportunities to SI
Opportunity to Self-Harm seems to be a common theme. Think about why opportunities are important to slips and learn why opportunity is important to you.
  • What made that opportunity more appealing than any other?
    Just couldn't take it any more
  • Did you make an opportunity or was it there for the taking?
    I made the opportunity. I had to go out of my way to get tools, and make them accessible again.
  • What would you have done if there was no opportunity, how would you have handled your urge?
    I would have kept trying distractions until I was tired enough to sleep or it was morning.
  • If there had been no opportunity would your urge to self-harm have increased or decreased?
    Increase probably. It had been building for a while.
  • What consitutes opportunity for you? Being alone? having new tools? waiting for the right feeling?
    Being alone, having tools available
  • If your opportunties were taken away, how would you feel?
We're all stories in the end.

Birdie is my pet birdie.

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